Splintered Reflections
by BrokenAndDiscarded
Summary: The Rugrats are in high school and a few things have changed since their younger years. The couples are TL, PK, and CA. Please read & review. - Chapter TEN is up. Holy jeeze, double digits already! -
1. Chapter One: Here Comes High School

  
Author's Notes:   
  
Hey everyone! I've always been a Rugrat fan and after watching the All Growed Up Special I felt the urge to write a fanfic based on the Rugrats entering high school. I myself just got over being a freshman so I am familiar with all the stresses and simple weirdness that goes along with entering a new school and a new peer pool... Well, its a rainy day out and I have nothing else to do so I figured why not go ahead with my idea!   
  
The relationships that will form in this fic are Kimmi/Phil, Chuckie/Angelica, and Tommy/Lil (I know some people prefer Tommy/Kimmi but I just don't see them going together, probably because Lil is by far my favorite ^_^). Please don't complain about my couplings, I hope that even if you disagree with my choices you will see that they work within my fic.   
  
Thanks so much - please review - enjoy -   
  
  
  


**Homecoming Queen**  
  
By *Jasmine*  
  
  
**Chapter One: Here Comes High School**  


  
So its my first day of high school. Swarms of talking kids all drift into the large brick building and I hesitate for a moment. I've been waiting for this moment all summer and yet I still don't feel completely prepared. I'm not exactly scared, after all, I'm Tommy Pickles. I've never really been afraid of anything. But its so different, I know high school is going to change my life forever... and I'm not exactly sure if I want it to.  
  
I might have turned around right then if it wasn't for my best friend and experienced sophomore, Charles Finister a.k.a. Chuckie, who stood by my side. The 15 year old boy had flaming red hair that was always wild and out-of-place and a pail face covered in freckles. Usually I was the one giving him encouragement but today it was the other way around. "Come on, Tommy, high school isn't so bad. But we better not be late and get detention on our first day," Chuckie said and he offered up a smile of consoleless at my fright, revealing his new metallic braces that lined his buck teeth grin.   
  
I nodded my spiky black haired head, realizing what a baby I must look like, and replied, "Yea your right. Lets go." Hefting my black backpack up on my back, I followed Chuckie into the school and the main entrance way. The smell of freshly mopped linoleum mingled with a hundred muddy sneaker soles filled the air, just like in middle school, and calmed my nerves a bit. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all.   
  
Glancing at the glass that separated the main office and a wrinkled, senile secretary answering the phones from the rest of the school's population, I checked my reflection over quickly. My new outfit of baggy dark denim jeans and a blue shirt that Angelica bought with me (Since she thinks she is so fashionably advanced then the rest of us common people) looked fine and just the right amount of style. I had dark black eyes and black hair that was spiked, I wasn't exactly the handsomest guy in school but not exactly a dweeb either, kinda average. Once I was satisfied, I turned to face my best friend.  
  
"We better get to homeroom before the bell rings. The teachers are usually strict about tardiness here. Who's homeroom do you have?" Chuckie asked, towering a full two inches above me. He always worried about things like that.   
  
I quickly recalled it from my memory and said, "Ms. McDouglas. You?"  
  
"O rats! I have Mr. Bourbon. Well, go down this hallway and take a left and there is Ms. McDouglas' classroom. See you later, Tommy," the redheaded boy directed and then dashed off, his yellow backpack loaded full with all sorts of school supplies that he would probably never need sagging behind him.   
  
I sighed and then headed down the hallway. People were walking and talking all around me; some familiar faces and other not-so-fimiliar faces. Suddenly I heard a loud voice call out, "Yo, Pickles! Long time, no see!"   
  
I recognized the voice immediately and turned around to see my friend, Phil DeVille, pushing through a crowd of people. The brown haired, brown eyed freshman boy seemed not at all nervous for his first day but that was usually the case with this wise-guy.   
  
"What are you talking about Phil?" I asked. "I just went over your house yesterday to play basketball, remember?"   
  
Phil laughed, "O yea, but your image was kinda blurry with all those circles I was dribbling around you."  
  
I chuckled and retorted, "Yea right, you just couldn't see right because I blinded you with my amazing basketball skills."   
  
Both Phil and I received playful shoves and looked over to see a short Asian girl standing beside us. "You both are wrong. It was me who dazzled you all with my many baskets and beautiful smile!" Kimi chortled and flashed a grin.   
  
"Hey Kimi," I said. After all this time she was still the same adventure-seeking tomboy we had first meet in Paris. The girl wore a light blue tanktop and worn jeans and her shoulder-length black hair was held up in a messy bun. Not exactly the best dresser in school but then again, no one really cared.  
  
"Beautiful smile? I don't think I was that blind..." Phil said teasingly and was answered by a punch from Kimi.   
  
Kimi, Chuckie's sister by marriage, glared at the DeVille boy and said, "O great, I can't believe I've got to share Mrs. Howard's homeroom with you for the rest of the year, Mr. Smart-Mouth!" Of course she was just kidding, Phil just had that way with girls that made them instantly both like him and hate him all in one.   
  
"O then I guess you guys aren't in my homeroom with Ms. McDouglas," I groaned.  
  
Phil shook his head and patted his friend on the back. "Nope, sorry. Looks like you won't be lucky enough to listen to my witty early morning comments this year, pal," he joked and then glanced up at a clock hanging on the hall wall. "O no! Its already 7:13! The bell rings in 2 minutes! Catch you later, Tommy!" he exclaimed and ran off.   
  
"Yea bye Tommy," Kimi said and then chased after Phil.   
  
I decided it was probably a good idea to start heading to my homeroom so I walked a little further down the hall until I came to a door with a sign over it that read 'Ms. McDouglas'. I took in a deep breath and entered the classroom just as the bell rang out.   
  
A room full of eyes all stared at me and the petite old woman sitting at her desk peered out under thick coke-bottle glasses. "What is your name, young man?" she asked sharply.   
  
I tried not to sound too intimidated since I had identified a few football players and upper classmen in the crowd of onlookers. "Tommy Pickles, ma'am," I responded.   
  
"Well, sir Thomas Pickles, you were lucky today," the teacher said snidely, "But a warning to you and all the others, I don't accept tardiness in my classroom and the penalty for being late is sever. Now take your seat, Mr. Pickles."   
  
I could feel my cheeks flush with color and I scanned the room to find somebody to sit by. There in the center row was Angelica, my older and snobby cousin. I quickly hurried over to an empty seat by her side and she glowered at me. Angelica was wearing a pink dress and platform sandals and her blonde hair brushed the tops of her shoulders. She'd often gone on about how popular she was in high school but I doubt any of that was true; she's too mean to be liked by very many except those who were snotty and fashion-obsessed.   
  
I could hear one of her friends sitting beside her giggle and whisper, "Is that freshman related to you, Angelica?"   
  
My cousin snorted, "As if! A freak like that could never be related to me."  
  
The teacher went on about school protocol and rules and it put most students to sleep. Angelica turned to me and her heavily makeup caked face was distorted in a scowl. She hissed softly at me so no one else could hear, "Nice going dweeb. Just to let you know, don't ever sit near me again. The fashion-handicapped and people such as myself can never mingle, got it geek?"   
  
I grumbled back, "Fine. Its not like I want to be your cousin anyway."   
  
As the teacher droned on and on and Angelica continued to pout and make hissing noises similar to an angry cat, I realized this was going to be a _very _long year.   
  


*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*   
  


Lunch was even more crowded then I had expected. Teens all swarmed around talking, fighting over the scarce chairs, and chomping on greasy school food. I made my way through the crowd until I saw Chuckie sitting at a table with Phil and Kimmi. I grabbed a chair and sat down beside Chuckie.   
  
"Hey guys," I greeted and took out a bag containing my lunch.   
  
"Hi Tommy. How are you classes so far?" asked Kimmi as she picked at the oily school food sitting in front of her on a bright yellow tray.  
  
I took out my sandwich and sighed, "OK I guess. None of the teachers have killed me yet if that's what you mean."   
  
Phil snorted, "Lucky. I have Mr. Garrison next for Wood Shop and I just know I'm not gonna make it out of his class alive."   
  
"Mr. Garrison? The scary bald guy who can chop threw a cinder block with his bare head? You don't have a prayer, not with your big mouth anyway," Kimmi giggled and the two went about playfully fighting again over their trays of school food.   
  
I turned to my best friend Chuckie and asked, "So how are your classes, Chuckie?"   
  
"OK I guess. There has not been one bully in all my classes so far," the Sophomore boy said proudly and bit into a carrot, causing one of his brackets to fling off. "O great, now I have to go back to the dentist to fix my braces. I hate it there, the drills scare me," he sighed.   
  
I took a bite out of my sandwich and said, "I wish I could say the same about not having any bullies in any of my classes, but unfortunately I have Angelica in my homeroom. Talk about bad luck."   
  
Chuckie looked up suddenly at the mention of Angelica's name and spluttered, "R-Really? Did she mention anything about me?"   
  
I gave him a weird look and said, "... No, she didn't even want to talk to me and I can't say I was exactly thrilled to see her either... Why?"   
  
The redheaded boy flushed the shade of his hair and pretended to be preoccupied with his lunch. "No reason at all, I was just wondering," he mumbled.   
  
I shrugged and turned back to Phil and Kimmi, interrupting their quarreling, "So where's Lil? She won't have a chair if she waits much longer." There was only one seat left and it was near me (that wasn't on purpose, no not at all ^_^).  
  
Phil and Kimmi both looked at me as if I was the Ninth Wonder Of The World and Kimmi said softly, "You don't know?"   
  
I gave a confused expression and said, "What are you talking about? I don't know what?"   
  
Phil looked sad as he grumbled, "Dude, look over there. It will explain everything," and pointed at the door to the cafeteria.   
  
I turned my eyes towards the doorway to see Lil DeVille come strolling in. Actually, it didn't really even look like Lil except for the pink bow in her hair. She was wearing a short blue denim skirt and a pink tank top adorned with a flower print. Her just-past-the-shoulders light brown hair almost looked blonde in the cafeteria lights and her brown eyes shimmered. Lil wasn't the same little worm-eating tomboy I had remember... now she was beautiful!  
  
Overcoming my initial shock, I called to her as she passed by, "Hey Lil, I saved you a seat!" I gestured at the chair by my side and smiled at her.   
  
The girl turned her head to me and looked surprised to see me. "Uh Hi Tommy..." she began and then offered up a dazzling smile that looked a little fake. "... That's nice of you... but I was thinking of sitting at another table." Her voice was high pitched and sweet, just like I remembered. At least one thing had stayed the same.   
  
I looked down and said, trying to hide the shock and hurt in my voice, "... O... OK. Well, see you later then."   
  
She nodded and said, "Ya, I guess so. Bye Tommy." Then she turned around and sauntered off on her platform sandals over to Angelica's table. A bunch of cheerleaders all sat around giggling and when my bratty cousin saw Lil, she exclaimed shrilly, "Lillian! I absolutely adore your outfit!"   
  
I turned away to face my friends, feeling like a complete idiot. "What happened to her?" I asked. It gave me the creeps to even think one of my best friends could possibly be another Angelica-in-the-making.  
  
Phil sighed and shrugged. "All I know is that one morning during the summer she told me she wanted to go to cheerleading practice with Angelica and that's when I knew she had changed... for the worse."   
  
"You are too dramatic Phil! Maybe she just wants to try a different scene for a while, ya know how it is starting at a new school," Kimmi said and smiled.   
  
Phil shook his head and grumbled, "Ya well you try to be Mr. Sunshine when you have an Angelica Twin running around your house talking about clothes and boys all the time. I can't stand it anymore!"   
  
Kimmi and I laughed at this and Chuckie said quietly, but not quit quiet enough, so that everyone at the table could still hear, "... I wouldn't mind it..."   
  
Three faces turned to him with wide eyes and exclaimed, "...What!"   
  
Chuckie turned a deep scarlet and looked down at the table, wishing he could melt into a puddle and slip away, "Did I say that out loud?"   
  


*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*   
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Chapter Two: One Smile And I’m Yours

Author's Notes: Ok I revived this story from an admittedly long coma. This is a story that was previously titled "Homecoming Queen". I changed the title as well as the concept just a little to up the originality. My first chapter was written long ago and I am hoping I can come back to it. Also its no longer written from Tommy's POV so I can show thoughts and a balance of emotions from each character. Please read and review! Thanks to everyone who reviewed before! +::.::Splintered Reflections::.::+ 

**By Jasmine**

Chapter Two: One Smile And I'm Yours 

*****

The school bus screeched to a halt and the door slid open, allowing a trickle of students to sprint down the steps. Phil and Tommy exited the bus, breathing in the thick wafts of engine emissions, and began the trek to the Deville's home. The vivid afternoon sun lit the suburban neighborhood and crested over the roofs of the identical houses, vivid unadulterated blue seeping into the horizon. Somewhere close by a dog barked urgently against his chain and a sprinkler system ticked away. 

         Tommy brushed a hand through his raven spiked hair and questioned, tugging at the straps of his pack absentmindedly, "So... what's first? Our Chemistry homework or a game of hoops?" His denim pants and dark blue tee shirt hung relaxed on his well-defined body.

         The boy beside him, who was an inch shorter and a little sturdier in build, shrugged nonchalantly. "Tough call. We really need to start our homework but being smart is so over-rated. I say I kick your butt at basketball; it won't take that long anyway," Phil boasted teasingly. 

         Tommy blurted out a dry laugh and trumpeted, as was the usual routine of taunting, "Ha! I'll take you on so I can shut that over-sized mouth of yours!"

         The boys came to Phil's house and tossed their backpacks haphazardly on the cool cement. Phil wrestled his basketball from were it was wedged between the adjoining crack of his house and the garage. He set up at the end of his drive and questioned as the game got underway, "So you check out any hot high school babes today?" Phil darted towards the basket only to be halted by Tommy, defending the net. The young boy matched his gaze with Tommy's and his lips turned up in a knowing smirk. "Your cousin was looking awfully fine if I do say so myself."

         Tommy's face blanched and he exclaimed in aghast horror, "Ack! No, don't say so! Don't tell me the terrible Angelica beast has struck again? Alas, Phillip, I knew ye well." However the dark haired boy had been thrown off guard and Phil charged foreword. He outstretched his arms and the ball left his grasp, making spinning arcs in the air to finally glide into the net with ease. 

         The young man narrowed his dark chocolate eyes and scowled, "So sneaky, dude!"

         Phil laughed and grinned cheekily. "Ah well, you're just jealous you're not as crafty as mui. Besides we all know Chuckie was practically going into asthmatic shock over Angelica, if he stared any longer he would have needed his inhaler," he said and tossed the ball sharply to Tommy. It ricocheted off the cement and Tommy snatched it into his hands, his frustration at his friend's antics all too apparent.  

         Tommy set up at the back line and began to dribble down the court. "Yea well..." he said and the tone of his voice was dry and unreadable. He continued, meeting Phil half way down the parking lot, "Your sister was looking pretty hot today too."

          The boy came to a screeching halt, his stomach churning. "Dude, that's like my sister you're referring too! And you've known us since we were fetuses so she's technically your sister too," Phil balked, unable to stand the taste of his own medicine apparently. Tommy merely chuckled and swiveled around him, making a dunk into the basket, the ball rolling off his fingertips. He whirled around, a triumphant grin on his handsome face. Phil grimaced and whined in a dead pan voice, "That was low, buddy, really low."

         The Pickle's boy shook his head softly and sighed with a smile, "Karma just kicked your butt." Then, as Phil wiped his hands on his baggy khakis to signify he was ready to get down to business and pull out all his punches, a thought struck Tommy and he inquired as innocently as possible, "And how is Lil technically my sister? She's not even close."

         Phil took his place and his hazel eyes were slits flecked with determination and a bit of annoyance. "And be thankful of that! She runs around practicing all these stupid cheers and making me lift her into cheering stands. And its 'Lillian' now, she thinks Lil sounds too childish. Why do you care? You better not wanna date her or I'll so have to enforce my big brother duties and kick your butt," Phil snorted and then put the ball in play, throttling down the driveway, driven on by frustration.

         Tommy recognized the shifting of Phil's mood, they'd been best friends for so long that they knew every sign, every little flinch, that meant the other was nearing the brink of an argument. For Phil, Tommy knew this meant anything dealing with Lil and her sudden change. The dark haired boy snatched the ball away and dribbled it in place a moment, commenting, "Relax, I was just wondering. Forget I even asked."

         The brunette haired boy nodded and relinquished a smile, his breath catching ragged in his throat. "Sorry, its just hard having Ms. Pep as a sister. You don't know the half of it, Tommy. Its like someone stole my sister away from me over the summer," he admittedly ruefully and stared at his green and white laced sneakers. 

         Tommy blinked into the sun and stared for a moment, realizing Phil probably didn't want to talk about it, even saying what was really on his mind helped a lot. So the tall boy swiveled around him, bouncing the ball towards the basket. Phil chased after him and jumped in front of him just as he took a shot, catching the ball in mid air. Then, with his back to Tommy and the hoop, the young man said wistfully, "Its too bad Kimmi couldn't come hang out. It's not the same without having her here to wreck."

         The boy covered Phil's back and smiled smugly. "Does someone have a crush on a certain tomboy?" Tommy responded.

         Phil exclaimed defensively, "What? I definitely don't! I just missed making fun of her, that's all!" He turned to try and dribble the ball past Tommy but the black haired boy intervened, stealing the ball away again. 

          Tommy laughed and replied in a drawn out tone, "Uh hu sureee..."

         The shorter boy with the chestnut hair and sun-kissed complexion shot his friend a flat gaze. "Shut up and play already," he grumbled.

         They continued playing; gaining ground before the other quickly evened the score. The gilded afternoon sun was on their backs and a thin film of perspiration lined their brows. Finally, Tommy was the voice of reason, as his eyes darted to his sports watch. "It's already four. I have to leave at five so we better go start on our homework," he said between shallow, torn breaths. 

         Phil trumpeted braggingly, "And leave it as a tie? I don't think so! You just wanna quit because you know I'm one second away from scoring the winning point." To prove his point he lined up the basket, squinting his eyes, and took a shot. The ball pelted the backboard and fell back to earth harmlessly, Phil's shoulders slumping with disappointment. 

         Tommy laughed and teased sarcastically, "Wow, you really figured me out. The whole thing about homework is really just some master ploy to stop you from winning. How'd you know, o wise Dalai Lama of smart-ness?"

          Phil, ever the master of dead pan humor, commented, "Hardy har." The two boys began to walk into the Deville's home, striding past the brightly decorated living room and the snoozing large yellow tabby cat. They climbed the stairs and reached Phil's room, the walls all a deep shade of aqua and his wooden floors coated in layers of clothing and discarded soda cans. Phil plopped down on his bed, the blankets creasing in, and dropped his backpack at his feet. He brightened with a proposition and offered, "Hey maybe we should call Chuckie! He's a wiz at all this science stuff."

         "Phil, we can't just cheat off Chuckie all year!" Tommy exclaimed, extracting his notebook and Chemistry book from his bag. 

         Phil's husky voice trailed off comically, "And that would be wrong because..."

         Tommy rolled his dark chocolate eyes and sighed, "Because we need to learn this stuff for ourselves and not slack off."

         Phil shown with a look of horror and he chortled, "Learn stuff for ourselves? Not slack off? You're talking crazy, man!"

         The raven haired boy said, "Come on, this is easy..." His eyes roved over their homework and the numbers blurred together in an unintelligent heap. "You just... Um..." he said weakly, trying to make sense of the formulas. 

          Abruptly they heard the sounds of the door swinging on its hinges down stairs and feet hitting the floor. The steps heaved under a slight weight and a body moved along the hallway. Lil came into view then, a glass of orange juice clutched in one hand and a deflated gold pom pom in the other. Her pleated white skirt, splotched with a few grass stains, brushed the middle of her thighs and her long slender legs stretched out beyond the hem. Her long light caramel hair tumbled down to mid back and was tucked safely behind her ears, her high cheeks flushed and kissed by the sun. "Hey, annoying loser a.k.a. Phillip," she greeted playfully and then her brown and emerald gaze fell to Tommy. She smiled slightly, a fracture of perfect dazzling teeth, and his heart swam up into his throat. "Hey, Tommy," she said simply and his name danced over her petal lips. He wondered to himself why he was losing his breath all of a sudden, why just the sound of his name over her tongue made him feel dizzy. 

         Phil feigned a smile and retorted in fake warmth, "O great, it's my darling sister back from cheering practice. Did they finally happen to drop you on your head yet?"

          The tall petite girl propped a spindly arm on her hip and questioned, sweeping her long eyelashes with mock sugary sweetness, "No. Have you finally hit puberty yet?"   

         The brown haired boy glanced out the window just as a crimson jeep rollicked over a bump and turned sharply out of the driveway, thumping with an intense base. "Whose red jeep was that that pulled out of our driveway?" Phil probed nosily. 

         Lil took a long sip of her juice and responded casually over the lip of her cup, her wide eyes sliding up to meet ours, "Bret Johnson's. His parents got it for him for his first car; I told him he was officially a spoiled rich kid now."

         Phil's eyebrows knitted in disgust and he plummeted deeper into his bed, resting an elbow into his spaceship pillow. "Bret? Gah, give me a break, sis! You're not dating that dumb jock are you? I might just have to tell mom ya know," he wallowed. 

         The lithe beauty narrowed her lustrous hazel eyes dangerously and snapped humorously, "You do, you die, little bro. I don't want to hear that 'birds and the bees' speech ever again."

          Tommy found his voice then, it was shaking and a little unsure but still there. "Yea well it's better then the 'flower and water hose' lecture I got. I can safely say I'll never be able to look at a watering hose the same way again," he added and shivered jokingly. He could feel Lil's gaze on him, the way their eyes would meet for the matter of an instant and shift quickly, as if in embarrassment. 

          Phil smirked and questioned, "Maybe I should go to your next practice, huh little sis? I can teach them some cheers." Then he poorly imitated a girl's high pitched voice and chorused pitifully, a beaming smile on his face, "Rah rah! Our teams gonna win, our teams the best. We're peppy and we have small chests! Gooo team!"

         Lil rolled her eyes and leaned against the doorframe, hovering just within his room, one long sinewy leg bent behind the other. "God, Phillip, I bet you stayed up all night thinking of that one too. How can you hang around such a loser, Tommy?" she sighed in exasperation. 

         The dark haired boy shrugged and forced down his anxieties and secret bliss at being in her presence. Tommy responded jokingly, as if Phil wasn't even in the room and sitting beside him, shooting him dirty glances, "I don't know, he sort of grows on you after awhile and I feel bad for the poor guy."

         Lil laughed a little, bubbled laughter spilling faintly from her mouth, and suddenly the phone bleated a few course rings downstairs. They heard as the Deville's mother heaved her footsteps along the kitchen tiles to answer the whining phone. Then their mom's voice drifted up to them as she barked loudly, "Phil, its that little girl, Kimmi, on the phone!"

         The boy leaped from the mattress with unhindered joy, a smile flying to his lips before he had a chance to bridle it. "Be right there!" he called in his deep, raspy voice, tinged with excitement. 

         His sister's face remained in collected place as she questioned mock innocently, "Kimmi? Wasn't that the name you were saying this morning in your sleep when I found you making out with your pillow and slobbering all over it?"

         Phil's cheeks burned with a flush and he quipped, "Yea because that **really** happened too." Then, turning to stare at Tommy, the light brown haired boy joked to conceal his humility, "Be right back, Tommy. If you don't look directly into her eyes I think you'll be OK." Then he walked towards the door, his gate quicker then usual. As he passed by, Lil playfully punched him in the arm and he merely chuckled. 

         Lil watched him go and then with a sly smile, she tilted her head behind the doorframe and called after him, "Better run, you don't wanna keep your lover-girl waiting!"

         Tommy watched and saw her turn to him then, finally allowing herself to reveal the interest she had been harboring for him all along anyway. She was hanging around her brother's bedroom door and it certainly wasn't to trade insults with Phil. The girl fingered the rough hem of her cheerleading uniform and walked across the treacherous mounds of clothing, the toes of her sneakers clinking against aluminum drink cans. Lil smiled absentmindedly and slid down beside Tommy, the boy sucked in his breath reflexively at the feel of her warmth against his side. The beautiful girl reached up and stroked a strand of long light chestnut hair behind her ear. She was peering over his book now that rested on his lap and turrets of her breath were on his neck. "So what's this?" she asked in her sweet rich voice.   

         The boy tried to gulp down his nervousness and responded, "Chem and its kicking my butt. I guess my plans to become a mad scientist one day will have to go on hold." She laughed at this and he did too, only his was a little taut and preoccupied with other thoughts.

         Lil looked over at him and said, not boasting but instead mechanically and automatic, like a statement, "I can help you. I was in it last year as an advanced placement and got straight A's." 

         Tommy couldn't hide the shock in his face, his eyebrows rising into twin peaks. "Straight A's! You're a geek in hiding aren't you?" he inquired, his anxiety overcome by his astonishment. 

         The young woman smiled, her lips turning up and causing her warm green eyes to crease with flecks of laughter. "You found me out! I'm a member of the Chess Club and everything," she joked and then continued, "It's really not that hard. Here, let me see it." Her long tan arms reached out to pull the textbook into her lap and she stared down at the pages, falling strands of hair collapsing across her torso. Tommy tried to concentrate on the jumbling of words but his eyes wavered upwards, to her soft flush lips as they silently read, to her tapered fingers as they pushed back silken locks behind her ears, a reflexive habit she had. He noticed the graceful sloping of her earlobe and then the line of earrings all along her ear, small silver hoops and tiny studs. There must have been four in each ear, including one at the top of her ear, a silver cuff earring. It was a little aflame and red, freshly pierced. 

         "Is that a new piercing?" he asked finally, forgetting he was supposed to be focusing on Chemistry problems.

         Lil looked up suddenly, her feathered eyelashes brushing over the crests of her cheeks as she blinked. "O..." she said as if she just became aware of the slight throbbing at the peak of her earlobe. "Ya. Yes it is. I got it last weekend; I haven't even shown my mom yet," she went on guiltily. 

         Tommy was a little surprised Lil would do anything without telling her parents first; she seemed like Ms All-American. First he found out she was a genius and now a slight rebel. Maybe she wasn't as cookie cutter as he had thought... "How'd you get it then without your parent's consent?" he asked. 

         She lifted a hand and lightly fingered the small etched clasp. "Me and Jill know this under the table parlor. They'll do tattoos and everything, they really don't care. It's a little dirty though and the guy that does it taught himself. Angelica thinks I'll get some infection and it'll travel to my brain. But hey, me and Jill figure you have to die sometime right?" Lil reasoned with a grin. 

         The boy laughed and watched the tip of her finger trace the edges of the cuff. He admitted, "Well I like it. I've been thinking about a tattoo but I know my mom would dismantle me. I don't know what I'd get though."

         Lil's face lit into a wide smile, showing the caps of her perfect teeth, and she chortled, "Shut up! So have I!" Her body was close to his; she made him feel comfortable, like he was talking to a friend. "I wanna get a little outline of a star on my foot, near my pinky toe," she continued, her foot swaying back and forth, bumping haphazardly into his.

          He nodded softly, realizing how close his limp hand was to hers on the mattress. "Cool. We'll have to go together sometime so we don't chicken out," he responded.         

          The girl met his dark gaze and said faintly, "Ya, ok..." She could feel the space between them shrink and grow paper-thin. Lil shifted her stare self-consciously back to the book on her lap and stated, "Well let's get back to this homework here. I won't give up until you understand it."

         Tommy allowed his attention to once again be pulled to Chemistry. He commented grimly, "If you really make any sense of this stuff to an idiot like me then I'll be in official awe of your brilliance."

         Lil smiled, her auburn and jade eyes roving over the paper, and said in agreement, "Ok, be prepared to be awed. Now, all you have to do is carry this over and then take this and square it." Her pencil moved in a flurry as she scribbled down formulas and numbers, her thoughts almost visible as they churned. 

         Try as he must, Tommy's gaze slowly drew back to her face, to the pink purse of her mouth as she fell deep in thought, to the end of her pencil littered with teeth marks. "Uh hu," he mumbled under his breath. 

         She kept writing as she questioned with knowing, "Are you watching what I'm doing?"

         He wasn't, he couldn't. Her skin looked too soft and peach to wonder about Chemistry equations, it was humanly impossible. He murmured, trailing off, "Uh hu..."

         Lil's wide eyes turned upwards at him, the lashes sweeping outwards, and a soft upturned smile glided along her face. She cried out, "You're not, you liar! How are you going to learn if you won't pay attention?" Even in her frustration, giggles spilled from the corners of her mouth and she pushed him teasingly. 

         Tommy's deep eyes clashed against hers and he grinned faintly but it was lost in thought. He wanted to tell her he couldn't concentrate with a beautiful teacher like her, but he couldn't say that. Instead he laughed a little and noticed a smudge of gold along the high rise of her cheekbone. "You have something... on your face, right here," he said barely above a whisper and touched his own face to show her the location.

         She blushed softly and reached up instantly. "Oh, it must be some of that gold face paint. Right here?" she questioned and her slender fingers moved across her skin, below where the gilded splotch was.

         The boy let his hand move out, almost cautiously at first as if he didn't have a right touching her. "No..." he began and his strong fingers found her face, the gentle slope of her cheek. He brushed the paint away and it came off easily onto the tips of his fingers, coating them. Tommy could have pulled back but right then he didn't want to, he wanted to feel her warmth like this and be caught in amber thickness. Her cinnamon scent filled his nostrils and her eyes searched his, curious and vulnerable. He knew the distance was disappearing, any moment it could happen, they might end up kissing. "Right here," he finished in a hushed tone. Her eyelashes swept lazily over her skin, slowly until they weren't moving upwards anymore, they had stopped and her eyes were pressed closed. Their faces moved closer, he watched her bottom lip. 

          A voice called boisterously, "No worries, the great P man is..." Phil swung into the open doorway, smiling broadly, and his face abruptly faltered. He cocked an eyebrow and he continued in surprise, "Back. Woah, what went on in here?"

         Lil and Tommy instantly retracted back to their original positions; Lil pulled the book back into her lap and thumbed through the pages, Tommy clasped his hands together across his knees. The rouge across their cheeks spoke of their guilt however. Lil responded sharply, "Nothing! Nothing, I was just helping him with his homework."

         Phil grinned knowingly and insinuated, catching the burn in their faces, "So that's what they call it these days."

         His sister flashed him a disgruntled glare and snorted, desperately pushing the attention away from her and Tommy, "Shut up! What did your girlfriend want, butt hole?"

         The young man came to plop down beside Tommy on the bed, the mattress springs sighing under his weight. "She's not my girlfriend! Kimmi told me there's going to be a Boxcar Racer concert at the arena next month," he exclaimed with eagerness. 

         Lil's face brightened and she squealed in jubilation, "You're kidding! I definitely wanna go!"

         Phil's face went blank with shock and anger; Tommy however ignored him and turned to Lil. "You like Racer?" he questioned, his eyes showing cautious relief. He couldn't believe how wrong he'd been about her. 

          The young woman smiled and commented nonchalantly, "Ya, doesn't everyone. You like them too?" She brushed back a strand of pale ash hair and her foot careened against his. 

         He nodded his head of dismantled dark hair and spoke, "For sure. We should all go then."

         Phil interjected then; interrupting them, "Hold up just a minute. We - as in, Kimmi, me, you, and my **sister**? Aren't there like laws against that or something?"

         Two faces turned to him like harvest moons and regarded him with exasperation. Tommy quipped, "Come on, Phil, stop being a jerk."

         Lil added with a sigh, "Impossible."

         The boy went on in his logic, giving his friend a pleading stare. "If we all like the band why don't we all go together? It would be stupid not to," he said. 

         Phil rolled his forest eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. "Fine, fine. Since it's two against one I guess I have no choice, but I'm not going to pretend to be happy about this. Let it be known that I will sulk!" he pouted. 

         Tommy brimmed with an electric smile and spouted joyously, "Fine, its known." Then his eyes darted to his wristwatch and he chortled in surprise, "O great it's ten past five! My moms gonna kill me; she nearly bit my head off the last time I was late for dinner. Alright, I guess we'll have to finish our homework on our own. Thanks for your help, Lillian." The young man stood to his feet and collected up his book bag and books. He glanced at Phil and then Lil, hoping he'd see a fleck in her eyes that read she wanted him to stay as much as he wanted to. 

          Lil smiled at him smoothly, her hands sliding over the blankets and pressing down the folds, feeling for his lingering warmth. Her long shins made slow arcs in the air and she responded simply, "No problem, Tommy."

         He stood there for a moment too long, staring and grinning no doubt like an idiot. Then he nodded again and said, "Ok bye." He turned and left Phil's room.    

*****

         Students mulled about the hallways, groggily preparing for the day ahead and yawning as they slouched against their lockers. Phil and Kimmi strolled into the freshman corridor together as usual; Mr. Finster drove the car pool and brought Phil, Kimmi, and Chuckie to school each morning in his minivan. 

         Phil shoved his hands into his sagging jean pockets and joked, blinking his hooded eyes against the bright ultraviolet lights shivering overhead, "Wow, so a six A.M. really exists? I heard about it but I thought it was a myth." He wore a tan shirt over his sinewy form and new suede shoes, his light brown hair neatly combed.

          Kimmi grinned good-naturedly and commented, "Yup, believe it or not there's this thing called 'breakfast' too. It's usually before lunch." Her medium length jet black hair brushed against the rises of her shoulders, flat and pin straight. She wore red corduroy pants that hung off her slender hips and a white graphic tee with scarlet lettering. Her red flip-flops padded softly against the linoleum flooring. 

         The young man gasped comically and exclaimed audibly, "You don't say! I'll have to write this stuff down!"

         They came to Kimmi's locker and halted, as was the usual schedule. The petite Asian girl fidgeted with her lock until it clicked open in release and then she struggled to shove notepads and books into the top compartment of her locker, inclining on her tipy-toes. She attempted to shove a heavy binder up there and it slid from her grasp, plummeting to the ground. Kimmi balled her fists in annoyance and snapped between gritted jaws, "Grrr! I hate having a top locker! I think top lockers were invented just to frustrate short people."

         Phil knelt down and swept up her binder into his arms. "It's not my fault you're freakishly short. Maybe you should buy stilts and extra long pants. Then everyone at school can call you 'Stilt Girl', that would be awesome," he said, trying to lighten her mood. He handed the small girl her binder and smiled down at her. 

         She laughed and nodded her head, strands of dark hair falling into her deep onyx eyes. "Good plan. Or I could just sit on your shoulders all day," she offered in agreement. 

         The boy reached a hand out without thought and grasped her tiny, petal soft palm, pulling her foreword. "Come on, midget, you can have my locker. It's better for the vertically challenged," he told her and led her along farther down the hallway where his locker was located. 

          Kimmi glanced at the locker and cooed happily, "Awww thanks." Then she turned to Phil again and narrowed her eyes. Her hands flew to her hips and she questioned suspiciously, "Hey, what's going on here? You're... being all decent and stuff... like a normal person. Is it my birthday or something?"

         Phil reacted with mock indignant and gasped, "Can't I do a nice thing for a friend?" 

         The young woman smiled up at his loaming form, her heart shaped ivory face aglow with a creasing of her peach lips. "No," she responded curtly and with a lacing of laughter.

         He smirked and suddenly neared closer to her, making Kimmi take a step back and her spine was pressed against the cold metal of the lockers. "Alright what I really wanna do is you. Right here, right now, against these lockers," he joked in a seductive voice, placing an arm by her shoulder and peering down at her. 

         Kimmi took a moment to regain herself and raised a slender dark eyebrow. She finally retorted, "See, much better. That I believe; that's the chauvinist Phil I know and love."

            They stood there for a moment, staring and unable to move. The smiles grew fuzzy and faint, falling slightly from their lips just as a voice cried out to them, giving them a reason to look away, "Hey guys! What's up?"

         Phil reeled back on his heels and snorted in response, "Hey, look who it is! The guy who practically made out with my sister in front of me and on my bed might I add!"

         Tommy reached them then and stopped before the pair, tucking his thumbs behind the straps of his bag. He was adorned in faded jeans and a black tee shirt, his hair standing on ends and perfectly disarrayed. "No way, she was just helping me with my homework!" he objected although the goofy grin on his handsome face told otherwise.

         The young brunette boy nodded and commented with a sky wink in his throat, "Sure, sure. All I know is the Angelica-bot doesn't hang around my room unless you're there." 

         Tommy merely laughed and shook his head in reply. "Whatever, dude."

         Kimmi spoke up just then at Phil's side, commenting in reluctant support, "Hmmm so our good buddy Tommy has it in for Lillian? Hey if little pom pom twirling snobs are your thing, man, then I'm happy for you."

         The boy instantly came to Lil's defense, saying, "Lillian's not a snob! Just because you don't like cheerleaders, don't take it out on her..." Then he added, his tone less believable then he meant it, "And how many times do I have to tell you guys I do not have any sort of thing for her." 

         The small-framed girl shrugged and responded with a knowing smile, "Alright, we believe you." 

         Phil began to grumble, "Speak for yourself..." However Kimmi's pointed elbow colliding with his rib cage changed his mind and he countered with a wince, "I mean, yea sure we do." He continued to rub his torso and glare at Kimmi. "You didn't have to do it so hard," he whined under his breath. 

         Kimmi rolled her eyes and sighed, "Don't be a big baby."

         Tommy began to drift over to his locker and was followed by his friends. "So when are we getting tickets for the Boxcar Racer concert?" he called over his shoulder.

         The Asian girl's face lit up and she exclaimed, clutching her notepads against her slender chest, "That's what I wanted to tell you! I heard on the radio the tickets are going on sale on Sunday. Since, pathetically, I have no life and have no plans on Sunday, I'll get you guys tickets if you give me some cash." Strands of black hair slipped into her eyes and she let it stay there, she didn't care. 

         The boy continued shoving books into his locker. "Alright, thanks, Kimmi! This is gonna be awesome, I heard it's a great show," he informed joyously. 

         Phil raised his backpack higher on his shoulders; he always carried it around with him since he heard once that all the muscular big football players at their school did it to build up their strength. He ran a hand through his pale brown hair and said nonchalantly, "I'll go with you on Sun, Kimmi. I don't have plans but its only because I had too many dates to choose from and decided to cancel them all so I wouldn't hurt those poor girls' feelings by picking just one."

         Kimmi snorted and retorted, "I'm sure they're grateful."

         Tommy finished jamming things into his locker and slammed it shut, turning around. His eyes went from his friends, their begrudging scowls and secretive glances at each other, the way they reflected in each other's eyes. He knew the way they felt, it was obvious. Why couldn't they admit it to themselves already? Then the boy's eyes scanned over to where Lillian had just strolled into the hallway. She wore white form fitting pants that fell low on her hips and a pale green tank top with a white butterfly pattern. Her long light brown hair was pulled half up and she was chatting with some friends and the dreaded Angelica, leaning against a locker. She laughed a little, fake and hollow, and nodded her head at appropriate intervals, feigned interest. Her hazel eyes slid past her friends, to where Tommy was standing, meeting his dark eyes for a fleeting moment before returning back to the girls as they talked incessantly about clothes and boys.      

          The boy blinked and then started past Kimmi and Phil. "There's Lil. I'm going to go tell her about the concert," he stated and even he was overwhelmed by his braveness. He didn't know why, but suddenly standing here and not taking a chance was worse then staying safe. He needed to put himself out there; he was Tommy Pickles after all. 

         Kimmi snapped in alarm, her oval eyes swelled wide and brimming with doubts, "No! Tommy, don't." 

         Tommy halted and gave his friends a lopsided smile, trying to calm their panic. "Wow, I didn't know this was so life threatening. I'm just going to ask her if she wants us to pick a ticket up for her..." he responded calmly.

         The short girl chewed the inside of her cheek apprehensively. "Are you sure? I mean, Tommy, like we said, Lil's changed," she inquired, not wanting to see her friend devastated. 

         He couldn't disguise the frustration in his tone as he shouted in exasperation at their dramatics, "No she hasn't! I'm starting to wonder what's the matter with **you** guys!"

         Phil's moss green eyes narrowed dangerously and he turned to Kimmi. His voice was cold and annoyed as he instructed flatly, "Just let him. He'll find out on his own." Tommy gave them a curious look and then began to walk over to where the giggling cheerleaders stood, Phil's gaze burning behind him. 

         They didn't even notice the approaching boy, the little huddle of girls laughing and making rude comments about what others were wearing that morning. Tommy stood a few feet away and questioned, his voice more shifting and unsure then he wanted it to sound, " Uh Lillian?"

         Six sets of eyes all turned on him and a blush spread self-consciously into his cheeks. The girls gave him dismissive gazes and hoped he hadn't been speaking in their direction. After all he might have been cute and on the football team but they only dated seniors, a rule set in place by Angelica and never really declared, yet each girl knew it was expected of them.  

         His cousin scowled at him and glared with venom. She wore a dark denim mini skirt and tan boots that stretched up to mid shin. The slender fashion snob was adorned in a scoop necked deep brown top and dangling feather earrings. Her flaxen hair was set in perfect uniform curls that spun against her shoulder blades and framed her oval face.  Angelica inquired in her scornful high-pitched voice, "Did you say something, freakazoid?"

         Tommy wanted to spend as little time speaking to** her **as possible. He shot her back an equally as loathing stare and he said evenly, "Not to you. I need to talk to Lillian for a minute." As he spoke, his gaze switched over to Lillian, she was watching him and there was a slight regret hazing in her eyes.  

         Angelica's nostrils flared slightly with anger and she flickered her long mascara clumped eyelashes. "Whatever you have to say to Lillian you can say in front of us," she declared.   

         The boy pushed a hand into his pocket and gave up all hope of speaking alone with Lil. She wasn't making any attempts against Angelica either so he sighed and gave up. Then Tommy questioned hopefully, "Those Boxcar Racer tickets are going on sale on Sunday. Did you want Kimmi to pick one up for you?"

         Angelica's voice piped up, her fuchsia painted lips curving upwards with menace, "Boxcar what? That's not one of those whiny punk groups is it? God, you have got to be kidding me! You are just pitiful, asking Lillian on some lame date! Why, it's preciously pathetic!" She shrieked with calloused giggles and soon all the other girls except for Lil were rocking with soft laughter, covering their mouths with their hands. 

         Tommy's temper rose and his eyes turned to angry slits again. "Don't you have somewhere to be, Angelica? Like under some little kid's bed or in a closet somewhere?" he shot back. 

         "Tommy, right now's not a good time."

         Lil's voice broke through his anger and he looked over at her, his face awash with shock and confusion. She met his gaze and her faint jade eyes reached out to him, begging him to go away, and he wanted to believe it was a lie. "But I... thought you said you wanted to go with me - I mean us," he stammered, causing another rupture of laughter to gurgle from the girls.  

         The young woman looked saddened and continued softly, "I changed my mind. I'm sorry."

         Angelica was grinning her Cheshire cat smile, riffling with glee at his embarrassment. "Don't you get it, loser? She's turning you down softly! Now take the hint and disappear back into your world of geeks!" she snorted. 

         Tommy couldn't believe it, he couldn't. He looked from Angelica and the sea of smirking girl faces and then to Lil. She clutched her hands together and blinked against the faint sheen threatening to take hold of her. Lil bit her bottom lip softly and then looked down to the floor, hoping she wouldn't have to see the hurt pass across his chocolate eyes. The young man turned and walked away from them, their chorus of peeling laughter ringing behind him. 

         "Tommy..." Kimmi said softly, her eyes small and compassionate. 

         The young man didn't say anything; the anger drawn across his face spoke enough. He stalked past his two friends, the betrayal sinking in.

         Phil watched him walk over to his homeroom and called after him, not boasting but merely stating, his tone laced with despair, "We told you, man." 

*

**End Notes: **Well that's it for Chapter Two. I know its been ages since I added a new chappie to this series and to tell you the truth I had no plans to continue. Renewed interest and a swift kick in the behind however sparked my creativity and viola! Well next is Chapter Three, so please look for that soon! ^_^ Thanks for reading this, please take one itsy-bitsy minute to review! 

O ya and I like Boxcar Racer. Sorry if you don't but please don't flame me if you have different taste then mine. I like all sorts of music but I think their songs will fit well with the fic. If you've never heard of them I suggest you check 'em out!


	3. Chapter Three: Deception Is Your Game

**Author's Notes: **Wow, again I just lost interest in this story and it was finally regained now. I was getting distracted by other fan fics and my original stories and well, just forgot about it. Sorry. I just think I was putting way too much detail into my last chapter so it felt like such a... chore. I'm cutting out a lot of the unnecessary detail now so hopefully these chapters will just start flying out of me. Ok, now please read and review!

**Splintered Reflections**

By Heather [TinySweetHeart]

--

Chapter Three: Deception Is Your Game 

"You've got them all convinced,  
And I know it so well.  
That you have missed your friends  
But you can count on them.  
Hold it now, you've got everyone convinced   
That you're alright.  
No one else is quite as wrong with it."

-- "So Beautiful" – Dashboard Confessional;

--

         Tommy walked into the Freshman hall, wishing it was summer again already. Not even a full week into school yet and he already hated it. He knew why, he just wouldn't admit it to himself, because he didn't want a girl to affect him that much. And not _that_ girl anyway. He was dressed in loose jeans and a long sleeved blue shirt with a 7 on the back, his dark hair still slightly damp. He'd been a little later then usual getting ready for school. Not on purpose of course, just he'd had too much on his mind. And he hated the fact that everything he had on his mind had a lot to do with _her_.  

         Phil was at his locker too, he must have got to school late also. He was wearing a red shirt and dark jeans and he looked over at Tommy with a groggy grin. "Hey, Tommy my man! What's up?" he called and slapped Tommy with a high five.

         Tommy smiled back and responded, "Nothing. Just trying to remember what it felt like to sleep later then 6:00 o'clock."

         The shorter boy snorted and said, "You and me both, amigo. I think my brains on Mexico time or something, although I've never even been there." Then, still smiling slightly, he turned back to his locker and tried to say nonchalantly over his shoulder, "So, uh, yea that's good to hear anyway. After what happened yesterday, I just wasn't sure -"

         Tommy cut him off sharply, his eyebrows raised. "I'm fine. Just because Lil was a witch to me doesn't mean anything. I don't care. Really," he stated.

         Phil looked less then convinced but he nodded his head. He replied, "Oh ok, well just checking. Because I called your house a few times yesterday and Dil kept saying you were busy."

         Tommy laughed and countered to change the topic, "That's because I _was_ busy, Phil. Homework, remember? That thing you never do."

         Phil glanced back at him with furrowed eyebrows and said, "Home? Work? What is this crazy thing you speak of? Those are two words that should never be put together. Ever."

         Tommy grinned and shrugged. "Don't worry, Phil. You'll figure it out soon enough when you start getting the 'F's," he joked.

         Phil laughed and shook his head. Then, still brushing through his mess of a locker, he admitted relieved, "Just glad to hear the Angelica clone didn't wreck you, that's all."

         Tommy forced on a smile and raised his arms up. "Wreck me? Come on, this is Tommy Pickles you're talking about. Has any girl ever wrecked me?" he boasted. Then the grin drifted into a scowl and he held at the straps of his backpack distractedly. "You were right though, you know. She has changed, for the worst. I don't even recognize her anymore," he went on, quietly harsh. 

         Phil finally finished rummaging through his locker and slammed the door closed. Looking over, he nodded and responded ruthfully, "Yup, I couldn't recognize her the day she actually told me "Jeeps were so last season". Honestly, like there was never meant to be so much air in one person's head. But I gotta go, I'm sure I'll be getting in enough trouble this year without having to be late too."

         Tommy just laughed and said back, "So, see you later, man."

         Phil grinned and started walking off, joking, "Yea, bye, dude. Gotta go give Kimmi a booster chair so she can see over her homeroom desk."

         Tommy smiled to himself and called after Phil, "You have it bad for her!"

         Phil turned to walk backwards and glower at him. "Shut up!" he shouted back and then turned around again, continuing down the corridor.

         Tommy shook his head and went over to his locker, fishing through his stuff. Just 366 more days left, he sighed to himself. He could do that right? He could avoid _her_ all year if he had to, I mean, it wouldn't be that hard. She probably didn't want to see him as much as he didn't want to see her. Well "didn't" was the optional word in this case. Because for as much as he tried to convince himself, he also knew he was trying too hard to tell himself that. Because there was still that part of him that felt electric and excited when just thinking about her. God, it was going to be a long freaking year.

--

         The lunchroom was echoing with shouts and laughter. Phil and his friend, Kimmi, made their way from the lunch line, swerving to the closest available table. Phil plopped down and Kimmi tucked a leg under herself and sat down by him. She was wearing slim jeans and a baby blue and white-stripped tee shirt. Half her hair was held back in a clip while the rest fell straight to brush her shoulder blades. 

         Phil started picking up his slice of pizza and said, "Mr. Garrison held my head near a buzz saw last period and threatened me with bodily harm."

         Kimmi didn't even look up at him as she responded flatly, feigning disinterest, "Huh. Really. Did you see my new sneakers? They're so awesome." She rose up a leg to show him her new blue basketball sneakers. 

         Phil cocked his eyebrows before looking at her again and repeating dramatically, "Ok, maybe you didn't hear me. Mr. Garrison, the school psychopath who I'm pretty sure spent ten years in prison, almost killed me."

         Kimmi planted her foot back on the ground and rolled her dark eyes. "You know he was never is prison, that was just a rumor. And yea, I'm pretty sure you deserved whatever you got, Phil," she retorted, use to his problems that typically resulted from him saying something rude or stupid.

         The boy raised his arms up and cried, "No, I was just an innocent victim, I swear! Although I did say he bares a striking resemblance to Mr. Clean. But come on, he does."

         Kimmi started picking at her macaroni and cheese, or well, her yellow goop. "See, one of these days your big mouth is going to get you in trouble. Or, in this case, your head cut off with a buzz saw," she stated.

         Phil glared at her before stuffing his face with food. "You know, I'm so glad you're sympathetic about this. _Really_ am," he sighed sarcastically.

         Kimmi just laughed and continued, "So anyways, this is me changing subjects. I'm so excited to go to a Boxcar Racer concert! It will be like the highlight of my life. And you don't have to tell me that's pathetic, I already know it is."

         Phil grinned at her lopsided and commented, "Well as long as you know it." Then he added genuinely, "Yea I can't wait either. I just hope Tommy still wants to go."

         The girl nodded her head firmly and replied bitterly, "He does. I mean, he wouldn't let... what happened yesterday affect him that much. Right? That was pretty brutal though. I mean how can Lil treat him like that? We use to be so close." She still had a hard time thinking about how Lil had turned on them, as much as she tried to convince the guys otherwise. It was like all those years of growing up together and playing in each other's backyards didn't matter to her anymore. That hurt because Kimmi had to face the facts that maybe, they had really just grown too far apart to ever be close again.

         Phil groaned and looked down at his plate plaintively. "I know, I seriously think Angelica gave my sister a lobotomy, that's the only explanation. Because I swear, she's missing half her brain now. And I'm afraid I'm going to wake up one morning and the other side will be missing too and she'll be running into walls and stuff," he responded.

         Kimmi looked down too and then bit her lip nervously. _Nervous_? Why was she nervous? It was just Phil, why did she care what he'd say or think? Still, when she spoke again, her voice sounded soft and timid. "But we're still going. Right? To the concert, I mean. Even if Tommy can't go," she said, averting her eyes back to him.

         The boy glanced over at her curiously and smiled slightly. "Sure thing. Hey, if I didn't know any better I'd think you were asking me on a date, Ms. Finister! I see how it is, my undeniable charm and good looks has finally gotten to you," he teased.

         Kimmi had to blurt out a laugh and scoff, "In your dreams, _stud_." But there was a jolt in her stomach she just couldn't stand. Because, Phil was Phil, and that's all he'd ever be. Her friend. Just like Tommy or Chuckie or... Ok, not really, because for some reason, over the summer and now, during school, she and Phil had been spending a lot of time together. It was usually all of them eating pizza or her, Tommy, and Phil playing a game of hoops. Still, lately they'd just been hanging out together because the rest of the guys were busy for some reason, and well, it had been _nice_. She never thought she could get along with Phil so well, because he was, well, Phil - a little obnoxious and sort of stubborn. But she could be that way too and they just seemed to click so well. It was weird and unexplainable and she was sure it was against some law of Physics. And yet, here they were, laughing and goofing off and she just couldn't stop that sinking vague feeling from swelling up.

         Phil stared over at her and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. "You have no idea..." he responded comically.

          Kimmi pretended she didn't just feel a little sharp intake of breath in her throat or her thoughts swim to places they shouldn't. She wrinkled her nose and shoved him playfully. "Sick, didn't want to know that," she snapped with a laugh.

         Phil just winked and added with a smirk, "I was kidding. In my dreams, there is usually you, me, and mud wrestling."

         Kimmi faked choking on her food and spluttered, "Big flirt. And I don't know if you noticed but I'm trying to eat here so I'd appreciate if you didn't make me gag." She had to remind herself that was a joke, that her heart should not be shivering so hard in her ribcage. She swallowed down her feelings and then questioned, recalling something, "Hey, Izaac Pomelin was calling me "Mary" today. What's that mean?"

         Phil tried to stifle his chuckles and he responded, "You don't know? That means you're like a prude, you look like a goody goody."

         Kimmi's face flushed pink and she exclaimed angrily, "What! That creep! I'm so going to punch him in the stomach the next time I see him." She couldn't believe it, that really hurt. Because she was almost certain it was true, and that was the worst pain in the world. When someone said something that hit far too close to the real thing. Because she always had done well in every class in school and really only had one boyfriend her entire life, in the third grade so that didn't even count. Because she'd always just been considered one of the guys and that sort of put her off limits to most boys. She blinked over at him, trying to hide the doubt in her tone when she questioned, "You... you think I'm all goody goody?"

         Phil could tell she was really feeling hurt by what Izaac said and shook his head, angry at the idiot who had done that to her. "No, Izaac's just a jerk," he responded with a scowl. She smiled back faintly and looked at him thankfully. Then he added with a grin, "Anyone can tell you're a slut."

         Kimmi laughed and punched him on the shoulder roughly. "Awww thanks. You always know the right thing to say," she responded sarcastically. He really did though, even if he did always end up making everything into a joke. 

         Just then Tommy came over to their table, just having grabbed his lunch from his locker after forgetting to do so this morning. "Hey, guys," he greeted the two with a smile.

         Kimmi looked over and grinned back. "Hey, Tommy. We saved you a seat," she chortled and patted the chair near her other side.

         Tommy nodded and put down his lunch and backpack. "Thanks. I'll be right back," he told them and then headed towards the vending machines to buy a drink. His mom always forgot to pack him one so he usually ended up buying one. He headed over to a soda machine and started glancing over the choices before finally pressing for a Slice.

         "You hate orange soda."

         He turned to see Lillian behind him, having stepped in line in back of him sometime while he didn't notice. He had a feeling this wasn't a coincidence, that she wanted to talk to him and needed an excuse. She could just act like she needed to get a drink and no one would suspect she was talking to a guy her friends didn't approve of because he didn't happen to be a popular Senior. 

Tommy glared at her blankly and replied a little too coldly, "Yea well, things change."

Her hazel eyes looked hazed with regret and she nodded softly. "I guess so. So, uh, about yesterday -" she began to say, looking down at her hands. 

She looked so beautiful, he thought absently. Her caramel hair was all down and wavy and she was just wearing fitted jeans and a green and pink stripped tank top, but somehow she looked better then ever to him. God, why did he have to think that? It just frustrated him even more and he interrupted sharply, "Don't. You said what you said and hey, so what. No big deal."

Lillian gazed up at him through her eyelashes and smiled slightly. "Ok, good. Because I'd like to be friends still, Tommy. Just like before," she replied gladly.

         Stop it; stop trying to make me like you. Stop trying to make me think you're who you use to be, when I know you're not. When I know you've changed and it will never be the same. "Yea a friend huh? A friend you can pretend you don't know in public? I don't want a friend like that," he responded with a frown, his face fighting to stay stone and hard.

         Her eyes swelled and she started to object, "What? No, it wouldn't... I wouldn't -" But it was true and she knew it and the words blistered with sour pain in her throat.

         Tommy stared at her and his eyes were edges of sadness and hurt. "Then how come you keep looking back to see if Angelica and her friends aren't looking over here? I get it, Lil. Just don't try to talk to me anymore and I'll do you the favor and pretend I don't know you," he said evenly. He turned and grabbed his soda can. Then he walked off, brushing by her without even giving her a second glance.

         Lillian couldn't help but watch after him, her lips parted and her mind reeling. She didn't want to hurt anyone, she never meant to. It was just something that was expected of her now that she was a part of a selected group. Why couldn't they understand that and be happy for her? Why did everything feel like a jumbled lie? She turned her head and saw Angelica watching her from their table, scowling at her with an arched eyebrow. Lillian quickly whirled around and punched in for a Diet Coke. Still, why did it have to hurt so much to hurt _him_? 

--

         It was 4:15 when practice finally was over. Tommy walked into the parking lot, his breath torn and he was sweating still. He approached Chuckie's beat up old car and slid the rusted door open. "Hey, Chuck. Thanks for picking me up, man," he greeted and threw his football equipment in the back before slipping into the passenger's seat.

         The red head looked over at him with a smile and replied, "No problem. What are older friends for?" He was dressed in a plaid shirt over a white tee shirt and jeans, his arm resting on the open window. "Buckle up, Tommy. Because if I get pulled over by a cop and get a ticket, my parents will really kill me and take away Betsy," he said, patting his car fondly. 

         Tommy nodded and tugged the harness over him. "Alright, alright! Safety belt on and secure. Anything else? You got a helmet for me to wear too, maybe a body armor suit?" he remarked sarcastically.

         Chuckie rolled his eyes and remarked, "Ho ho ho. Always the kidder you are. Believe me, one day you'll be thanking ol' Cautious Chuck for never getting your brain splattered on the road."

         He started up the car and it purred to life. Chuckie started putting out of the school parking lot when they passed Angelica by her black BMW, screeching something indefinable and slamming her foot into the bumper angrily. Chuckie pushed on the brake and stopped by them. Suddenly a girl stood from the curb, brushing off her cheerleader skirt, and Tommy realized with regret that it was Lillian. 

"Uh hey, guys," she said with a smile in their direction, her eyes passing from Chuckie to Tommy.

Chuckie stared at Angelica as she passed huffily and asked, "What's the matter with your car?"

         Angelica didn't even pause from stomping back and forth, glaring at everything around her. "Ugh, can you like not speak to me right now? Because I'm not in the mood to pretend to be nice to losers," she snapped.

         Tommy leaned back into his chair and stared ahead, not wanting to lock eyes with either of the girls. "Huh, you're never in the mood," he couldn't resist retorting. 

         Lillian said, her smile already dissipating to a frown, "Angelica's car is having engine trouble. She called the tow company already and they said they couldn't make it out here until two hours from now."

         Angelica stopped walking long enough to throw her hands up in fists and shriek, "Yea, freakin' great! I mean, like really, what else are they doing all day except sitting around on their lazy asses and eating donuts? I mean, I'm an **important** person. Important with a capital **I**." 

         Tommy glared over at his cousin from the corner of his eyes and smirked. "You said all this and they still couldn't get out here any sooner? How surprising," he replied.

         Her hard ocean eyes darted to him and she growled, "Can it, Pickles. I am not in the mood for your back talk either."

         Chuckie was staring at Angelica hopefully and his cheeks were already burning. "We can... uh, give you guys a ride if you want. I mean, we all live around each other. Why not, right?" he offered, stammering like crazy.

         Lillian's face brightened and she smiled, saying, "Really? Thanks! You guys are our heroes." She walked over to the back door, opened it, and sat down.

         Angelica's eyebrows raised and her features were set in aghast horror. "What! Well fine, but I am so ducking if I see anyone I know," she grumbled and then plodded over to the passenger's side. Opening the door, she gestured with a hand and said flatly, "Hey, twerp, move."

         Tommy narrowed his eyes at her and argued, "What? Are you kidding me? Unlike all your other dumb followers, I don't just jump when you snap your fingers, Angelica."

         Angelica rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "Ha! Move or I'll tell my mom to tell your mom you were so cruel to her poor unfortunate niece after she was having car trouble that she actually cried," she replied sneakily.

         Tommy glowered at her and then mumbled, "God, fine. You're really evil, you know that." He stepped out of the car and went around to the back, slamming the door behind him.

         Angelica shifted daintily into the passenger side seat and smiled slyly. "Yes. It's a gift, I know," the cheerleading captain responded mock sweetly.

         Chuckie started to drive out of the parking lot and stole glances at the girl by him. Finally he managed up enough courage to begin to say, "So, Angelica -"

          Angelica had her blonde hair pulled up in a ponytail so the curls bobbed with the car. "Look, Finister, just don't think you doing me this favor is reason for you to talk to me," she responded coldly and didn't even look his way.

         Chuckie felt his face grow crimson again and he stuttered, "Uh, ok. I was just going to say -"

         The girl cut him off quickly, still not looking at him. "Don't care. How do you change these radio stations anyway? This is like an eight-track player from the 70's or something," she snorted and leaned foreword to start pushing random buttons on the radio. Anything to avoid having to speak to this loser, she really didn't need him thinking they were all chummy all of a sudden or something because they'd shared one car ride. As if.

         The awkwardness seemed to be contagious in the car. In the backseat, the two teenagers sat inches apart, staring out the window self-consciously. The silence was thick and isolating like a weight on them. Lillian tucked a strand of hair behind her ear anxiously and looked over at Tommy hesitantly. "You were really good today on the field," she said first.

         The boy looked over, surprised to hear the quiet broken, and shrugged modestly. "No, I wasn't. I'll probably be stuck on the bench again next game," he responded, trying not to meet her eyes.

         Lillian smiled faintly and replied, "Well that's just because your coach is an idiot. I mean, anyone can see you're getting really good. Like even better then a lot of the Seniors."

         Tommy couldn't believe she was complimenting him and in his shock he let his eyes turn over to lock with hers. "Uh thanks. You were... uh, good too. I mean the... handstand thing. Good," he replied, stumbling for words. Great, now she'd know he was watching her. Just _great_.

          She laughed and her gold-flecked eyes were creased with a smile. "Thanks. You don't have to pretend to think cheerleading is interesting or anything. I know its not," she responded.

         Tommy raised his eyebrows and shook his head. "What? I never said that. I think cheerleading is... cool," he said and sounded less then convincing.

         Lillian laughed again and it sounded really... perfect. He distantly thought she should do that more often, when she was with her friends anyway, it always sounded so empty and fake. She replied knowingly, "Could you at least try to be a better liar, Tommy? I know you guys all think I'm insane for being a cheerleader and well, don't tell anyone, but I use to make fun of it too. Only its nice, you know, to be a part of something now. I feel like I'm actually _doing_ something in high school. And it turns out, I'm actually ok at it."

         Why did she need to a part of them? Why wasn't it enough just to be a part of her old friends? The group of friends she use to have, instead of all the shallow snobs she needed to submerse herself in now. It was like she just told him they weren't good enough, they didn't make her feel important enough or something. It wasn't her just being a cheerleader, it was _everything_. He turned to stare out the window again, hiding his feelings.

         There was that solid pressing silence again collapsing on them. Lillian bit at her lip and rubbed at her bare legs. Finally she was the first to speak again, probably because she felt guilty and she knew it. "So uh, how'd the Chemistry go?" she questioned.

         He looked over at her again and rolled his shoulders nonchalantly. "Ok I guess. I got a D so that's a grade above failing," he replied, remembering how she'd tried to help him with it a few days ago.

         Lillian grinned and said, "Good to see you're a 'glass is half full' kind of guy."

         Tommy smiled too wirily and responded, "Thanks, I'll try to remember that when my parents ground me for life."

         The girl winced and gave him a sympathetic gaze. "Ouch, that bad huh? All you need is the right teacher. I'll come over if you want, help you study. When's your next test?" she asked.

         "Friday," Tommy informed, wondering why she suddenly cared so much.

         Lillian nodded, chestnut hair tumbling over her shoulders, and replied, "Ok well, I'll come over after practice on Thursday and help you cram. I guarantee a B or higher."

         Tommy knew it was dangerous, he knew he was asking for trouble. He didn't need to let himself feel anything more for her, friends or anything else. That would only end in pain and more probably then not it would be him who ended up hurt. Still, he just wanted to be with her a little longer. What was so wrong with that? He knew the answer - _everything_. He replied in spite of his doubts, "Really? Cool. If you can even get me a C I'd be your slave for life."

         Lillian laughed and the car jerked to a halt. "Don't say that, I'd really take you up on that offer. Well, see you later, Tommy. Don't forget, Thursday we have a date!" she exclaimed with a smile before opening the door and sliding out, unfolding her long spindly limbs.

         Tommy watched her go and said, "I won't." He still couldn't stop from smiling and he knew he was getting into trouble and somehow he didn't care.

         Upfront Chuckie smiled over at Angelica as she unbuckled herself and he said politely, "So uh, nice talking to you -"

         The side door slammed in his face as the girl quickly bolted from the car and up her driveway, to her door with Lillian in tow. Chuckie watched her go with a sigh as he finished coldly, "Angelica. Do you ever get the feeling you've just been completely used?"

         Tommy nodded and looked at Chuckie's back. "Yea but for some reason, I think you didn't mind it all that much," he suggested with a slight smirk.

         Chuckie shoved the gear into reverse and tore out of the driveway. He was glaring at Tommy through the overhead mirror when he countered angrily, "What's that supposed to mean! You weren't here last year but let me tell you something, as a Freshman Angelica never once said hi to me. She didn't even act like she remembered who I was, the guy she's known her whole life. I'd get pushed around right in front of her and she'd just walk by like she didn't care. So, I'm not in the Angelica fan club, ok. And I definitely don't like her."

         Tommy's dark eyes faded with understanding and sympathy. "Sorry, Chuck, I know my cousin can be a mean snob. I didn't mean to say anything that was out of line," he replied sincerely. 

         The older boy just sighed and ran a hand through his unruly hair. "No, you didn't. Whatever anyway. I don't care what a self-absorbed Princess has to say about me or if she acts like I don't even exist. I'm use to it by now, I've got a thick skin already," he replied, trying to convince himself. Even when he knew he did care and it always did sting a little sharper each time.

         Tommy nodded and smiled. "Well, that's good to hear. Because, I mean, she's Angelica. I think if I ever had to see her real face from underneath all that make-up crap I'd be scarred for life. I bet she really does look like Danny DiVito or something," he said, trying to crack a joke and make his friend feel better.

         Chuckie stared off out the windshield and his eyes grew wistful. "Yea. She's still pretty... In a shallow, egotistical way, of course," he relinquished.

         Tommy sighed inwardly. He didn't want Chuckie to like Angelica, it wasn't fair to him. She'd just keep crushing him and he'd get his hopes up again only to have them smashed down each time around. He knew his cousin; he'd seen her in action before with other boys. Never mind Chuckie was a little weak around her as it was, she'd kill him if Chuckie didn't start making a change. "You know, you should try sticking up for yourself to her. I know you're really smart and could give it as good as she does. Just let her have it one of these days, man. She deserves it," Tommy offered.

         Chuckie drove the car into the Pickle's driveway and shrugged dejectedly. "Yea, well, maybe. I don't know why I'd even bother. It's not like she'd even care what I had to say. But bye, Tommy. See you tomorrow," he responded.

         Tommy opened his door and got out, saying, "Bye, Chuckie. Thanks for the ride." He grabbed his equipment from the backseat floor.

         "No problem," Chuckie replied and then Tommy closed the car door. Chuckie drove away as Tommy walked over to his front steps and into his house. _She_ was there in his head and he wondered silently if he really wasn't that similar to Chuckie in a way. Because as hard and as much as he tried to forget her, she was lingering in him and he couldn't help it.

--

**Closing Notes: **The next chapter will be done like tomorrow I swear! Ok, so anyway, I know I focused in on how Kimmi felt about Phil more this time around but next chapter it will be more how Phil feels about Kimmi so no fears. Yes, and Izaac Pomelin was very much mentioned for a reason and you'll find out next chapter. I know Angelica seems like a raging B word right now but believe me, it won't always be that way. Maybe if Chuckie finally gets a backbone... Hee. And why is Lil acting all cold to Tommy in public and then warming him up when everyone's not around? Because she wants to have her cake and eat it too, that's why! She's also feeling bad now and wishes they could still be friends. To me, their relationship sorta reminds me of Ephram and Amy on "**Everwood**" in the beginning of the show, only Amy isn't embarrassed to be seen with Ephram. Ok well, I'm popping this next chapter out really quickly! ::Type, type, type.::  


	4. Chapter Four: This Bitter Pill

**Author's Notes: **Ok, well I do not own **Rugrats**, only **Nick **does. (A Guy Named Nick: Woo hoo! I do? Me: No, not you, idiot. The television channel!) This story is about what happens when the group enters high school and they've had to grow apart. In Lil's case, she's turned into another Angelica! Ok, now please read and review!

**Splintered Reflections**

By Heather [TinySweetHeart]

--

Chapter Four: This Bitter Pill 

"This medicine is just what you deserve.   
Swallow, choke, and die.   
And this bitter pill is leaving you   
with such an angry mouth."

-- "This Bitter Pill" -- Dashboard Confessional

--

            Chuckie and Tommy sat in the cafeteria, eating their sandwiches as other students swirled around them. Chuckie looked over at Tommy and smiled, revealing his metallic brackets. "Hey, guess what? I'm getting my braces off in a month! Isn't that awesome? I finally talked my dad into getting me those clear ones you can't even tell someone's wearing. So yea, the ladies should be lining up any day now," he said excitedly. He was wearing a dark green shirt and khakis.

            Tommy glanced over at him and grinned. "You're starting to sound like Phil," he replied. Tommy was dressed in jeans and a gray hoodie sweatshirt, having not felt like really dressing up that much this morning.  

            Chuckie blanched and his eyebrows rose nervously. "Don't say that, that's scary. Besides I was joking. With or without my braces, I'm still Freckles Finister," he resigned with a sigh.

            His friend shot him a weary glance and responded, "That's not true, man. You try what I told you to do? You know, tell Angelica off?"

            Chuckie shook his chaotic scarlet hair and admitted, "Haven't had a chance yet. Well that's not true, in the hallway she yelled out, "Red headed freak". But I uh, just walked away."

            Tommy met his stare and instructed, "Chuck, pal, you have to listen to me, ok. Girls like Angelica only know one way of communicating – insults. You really need to just start sticking up for yourself; I think she'd notice you then. In a good way."

            Chuckie shrugged and sighed, "Ok, well, I'll try. But she's scary."

            Tommy cracked a lopsided smile and agreed, "You're telling me."

            Just then Phil plopped his tray down next to Chuckie and slid into his seat. "I'm starving, I think I'm gonna have to go up for seconds," he said as a way of greetings.

            Tommy laughed and shook his head. "You always do anyway, Phil. The lunch ladies hate you," he replied.

            Phil started digging into his food and commenting through mouthfuls, "That's just because they aren't use to someone telling them their hairnets are sexy. But hey, I like what I like ok. Don't judge me."

            Tommy suppressed another laugh and tried to sound serious when he said, "Man, you are gonna get in trouble for harassing people all the time."

            The dark hair boy wearing khakis and a black shirt rolled his eyes. "You sound just like Kimmi. Speaking of the feisty midget, where is she? She wasn't in homeroom or anything. She sick?" he questioned, trying not to sound too interested. 

            Chuckie blinked at him and said, "You didn't hear?"

            Phil knitted his eyebrows together and responded, "No. What?"

            The boy told him, "Kimmi was suspended for the day."

            Phil's eyes swelled wide with shock. "What! Why!" he cried.

            Chuckie shrugged and replied, "For beating the crap outta some guy yesterday, Izaac Pomelin. He was bruised up pretty bad. The only reason they didn't suspend her for longer was because I guess she had a good explanation."

            Phil's face darkened in anger and he narrowed his eyes, thumping a fist against the table. "That punk! I know him from the basketball team, he deserves everything he gets. Did she say what happened?" he went on to ask.

            Chuckie shook his head and said, "No, she wouldn't tell me. She locked herself in her room; my parents are grounding her anyway. Put it this way, if she ever sees the light of day again that will be too soon for them. They really flipped out on her."

            Tommy cringed and sighed, "That's tough. Poor Kimmi."

            Phil nodded his head feverishly and was still clenching his jaw. "I know. I'm gonna make Izaac pay even more during basketball practice. He'll come to hate me," he sneered.

            Tommy was looking at his two friends when he saw between their heads, the door to the cafeteria swing open and a trickle of girls pour in, all giggling. A little to the back walked in Lillian, sauntering beside Angelica and smiling. She had the most beautiful smile. O God, stop it. Stop it! Because you're supposed to be worried about Kimmi, not some girl who won't even give you the time of day. Still, he couldn't stop himself from watching her, he felt like the seconds were dragging by in slow slipping moments. Lillian breezed in, light brown hair collapsing down her shoulders, dressed in a black skirt and a white long sleeved shirt. There was that smile and then, it happened. She looked at him and her warm moss eyes clashed into his and they just stared. She was moving and all the girls were not noticing, but she was staring at him and the white petal smile wavered slightly and faltered breathlessly. Then she blinked, once, twice, and turned her head to say something to Angelica and the moment was gone. 

            "What the Hell was that, man!"

            Tommy darted his gaze back to his friends, catching his breath. "Huh? Wha?" he questioned, winded.

            Phil was staring at him with hard, inquiring eyes and replied, "You got all like quiet and weird..." He turned his head to look behind him and see the gaggle of girls trailing in. Phil turned back to look at Tommy and smirk. "O well, figures. It's my sister. If I didn't know any better I'd think you had the hots for her," he said knowingly.

            Tommy swiped away the dazed glass from his eyes with his eyelids and hurriedly retorted, "Are you joking? You saw what she did to me! Like I'd actually like her anyway, she's just as bad as my cousin."

            Phil shook his head dejectedly and snorted, "Say what you want but you and Chuck-a-roo over here are pathetic. Turning to mush over girls who aren't even worth it."

            Chuckie glanced over at him and smiled slightly. "As opposed to what? My sister who is _totally_ worth it?" he scoffed in return.

            Phil glowered at him and exclaimed huffily, "Shut it, Finister! I don't like your sister. Get it? N-O."

            Chuckie just laughed and then looked to Tommy, raising his eyebrows. "Riiight. The young man doth protest too much, I think," he replied teasingly.

            The brown haired boy glared at both of them in turn before snapping, "Ok, what does that mean? I don't care. Let's talk about something else already besides girls. Sports. Yea, sports." They each began an empty forced conversation about football, basketball, and in Chuckie's case, golf. All the while each pretending they would never think about _her_.          

--

            Lillian felt like she couldn't breath. What had just happened? She'd been walking into the cafeteria, talking amongst her friends. And then she saw _him _and the whole world seemed to pause on its axis. _Him_, with his mused black hair and dark onyx eyes and warm adorable smile. God, why did he have to be so cute? Why did she even care! He was just there and she should be able to ignore him. Only when her eyes were flickering to his, it felt impossible. Because when he stared at her and she saw flecks of wanting and happiness in his eyes and the torn air rose in her throat, it all just felt _right_. 

            "Ew! What was that?"

            Lillian blinked and turned her head around, dazed. Angelica was glaring at her and crinkling her nose. "Huh? What was what?" Lillian answered innocently. Just deny it, deny how good that felt and no one will have to know but you.

            Angelica was digging her eyes into her as she snipped, "You know! That totally lovesick gaze you just gave him. O my God, you like him! You like..." She grabbed her lower arm and made her pause behind so the others would walk off and not hear. "My cousin," she finished in a whisper, her eyes wide with horror. She was dressed in a dark jean skirt and a jean jacket over a blue tank top, her flaxen hair straightened now and tumbling down her back. 

            Lillian's eyebrows shot up and she shook her head hastily. "What! You're crazy, Angelica. We're not even friends, the only reason we were even talking yesterday was because I was stuck in the backseat with him," she responded coldly.

             Angelica seemed a little satisfied by that but still crossed her arms over her chest and stared at her hard. "And you're going over his house today after school. Sounds like a date to me," she replied, tapping her foot.

            Lillian just rolled her eyes and sighed, smiling slightly. "Shut up, it is not! Its called studying, Angelica. I'm just going to help him out. We owe them that much after they drove us home and basically rescued us when we were stranded," she reasoned.

            "Yea, so, I'll buy them a fruit basket or something," Angelica snorted back. Then she pursed her lips and added, "I still don't see why we have to let them drive us home again today when we have so many of our less socially challenged friends who are able to drive us. Not to mention Brett..."

            Lillian gave her a pleading look and replied, "I know but please, Angelica. I have to go to Tommy's house so we might as well. Just don't tell Brett."

            Angelica sighed and unfolded her arms, huffing, "Fine, I won't. Just don't make it a habit. We wouldn't want this getting out in the open now would we?" She was staring at her with calculating tidal eyes and Lillian knew what that meant, if Angelica ever found out she was hanging with Tommy or the others again she'd spread it around to all their friends.

            Lillian nodded and responded softly, "No, you're right. This will be the last time."

            Angelica smiled and said, "Good. Now come on, our seats are waiting." Then she swiveled around on her heels and waltzed over to their table, Lillian following. 

            As they took their seats, Lillian slid down near a blonde haired boy. He was tall and lanky, pretty built. He wasn't a Senior, he was just a Junior, but he was such a good football player and almost every girl thought he was gorgeous so he already was pretty much the most popular guy in school. He glanced over to her as she sat down and smiled. "Hey, babe. How was your day?" he questioned.

            Lillian shrugged and crossed her legs. "Ok. Boring, I guess. Yours?" she responded.

            He replied, "Fine." Then he grinned at her again before turning his head and continuing to talk with his buddy about football. 

            Lillian sat there, running a hand through her hair and staring off. Angelica was busy chatting up a boy near her and giggling at every stupid thing he said. Lillian wondered how much fun she could be having right now, if she was back with her old friends, if she was sitting at that table and across from Tommy and he was smiling at her. Instead of sitting here with Brett's arm over her chair and feeling so... _alone_, like none of these people even really knew her.

--

            After Chuckie dropped Lillian and Tommy off at Tommy's house, he started towards Angelica's house. The afternoon was skimming with white sunlight and the streets stretched out in front of them. Chuckie was in a good mood and he smiled as he tapped his fingers against the steering wheel to some radio beat. Looking over at Angelica, sitting stiffly by him, he began to ask, "So how was school -"

            The blonde stared ahead, glaring, and cut coldly, "Look, I thought we already established this. You, don't talk to me. Like, ever." 

            Chuckie felt his good mood shrinking and the smile flatten into a line. What was her problem anyway?

            Angelica looked out ahead for another few minutes before leaning over to grab the dial and switch it from this God-awful rock music. 

            "Don't touch that," Chuckie suddenly said and Angelica paused to look up at him, her eyebrow raised.

            Still frowning at him, she questioned, "What?"

            Chuckie took in a deep breath and steeled himself. Do what Tommy said, grow a backbone. "I said, don't touch that. Do you suddenly have a problem hearing?" he snapped. Wow, did that feel good! A little too good, he felt a tinge of satisfaction leaking in him.

             The scowl increased and she crossed her arms over her cheerleading uniform. "Excuse me, Finister!" she spat, fully looking at him now with a death glare.

            He didn't know what was coming over him but it was a rush. Suddenly he'd let some of his anger out and it was flooding now, too overwhelming to even filter what he was saying. "Again, did I mispronounce anything? Because I'm pretty sure I didn't. And another thing, besides what you might think, I was only trying to be polite and start a conversation with you while you were in _my_ car, getting a ride from _me_. I am _not_ trying to talk to you because I worship you or think you're the most beautiful creature on the face of the planet. If you want to know the truth, I think you're the most self-absorbed, stuck up, whiny, bitchy girl I've known. Ever," Chuckie shot back. Holy God, did he just say all that?

            Angelica apparently was having the same thought because she pressed her back into the chair, blinking dumbly. Her lips parted open to gasp and she said in shock, "O. My. God. That did not just happen."

            Chuckie smiled thinly at her and responded, "I believe it did. You might want to close your mouth; you look like a real idiot. Wouldn't want any of your friends seeing you like that now would we?" Wow, once he started he just couldn't stop. It was just such a relief to finally let her know what he really thought about her.

            She was staring at him, bewildered, when he drove up her driveway. Chuckie parked and watched her as she opened her door numbly and stepped out on the asphalt. Holding the door open, she narrowed her eyes at him and tried to retort something back, "You... You... You..." Ok, so she wasn't that use to people actually talking back to her and it had knocked her for a loop.

            Chuckie grinned and replied, "Close the door, I'm feeling a draft." She scowled then at this and growled before slamming the door hard. He watched her stomp up to her door, grumbling under her breath. Chuckie just chuckled to himself and wondered why he'd never tried that before.

            Angelica climbed her stairs to her fuchsia bedroom and tossed down her pom poms, toppling onto her canopy bed. Lying on her stomach, she gripped the pillow in a rage and strangled it. Now if only this was Chuckie's head. Ok, wait, why was she getting all upset over _him_? He was a loser, a nobody, a Sophmore! Turning over and smoothing out her pin straight hair, she stared up at her canopy top pattern. What was the matter with her? Who cared what a silly nerd thought about her? She knew the answer – _she_ did. Because as hard as she tried to pretend, there was a reason she had slipped into that passenger's seat the other day and practically forced Tommy out, and it wasn't just the extra legroom. She'd always known Chuckie could have some guts, if he just tried. And then, BAM, he just had and completely torn her a new one. And now she was reeling and collapsing, as much as she tried to act like she wasn't. Because there was something about Chuckie Finister that just got under her skin, where no other boy had.   

--

            Kimmi swung the door open, stepping onto her porch. The afternoon was melted with a setting sun like puddles of crayons, oranges and reds all smeared on the horizon. She was wearing longer jean shorts and a white tee shirt, her hair down. When she saw Phil there she smiled awkwardly and said, "Hey."

            Phil looked down, feeling nervous. _Nervous_? He was Phil DeVille, he had never been nervous in his life! Still the reason he had run over here after supper slipped his mind and he responded simply, "Hey." Again, a one-word reply? Ok, he wasn't like himself for some reason.

            Kimmi ran her hand up her arm and smiled slightly. "So what you do so my parents would let me out of the house? Beg? Bribe?" she laughed.

            Phil glanced over, resuming his cockiness, and arced an eyebrow. "Told them if you tried to attack me I could defend myself better then Isaac did," he replied.

            The girl rolled her eyes and said flatly, "Funny. Hilarious even."

            Phil smiled back now and shrugged. "No, really, I just said I needed to talk to you. Your parents love me," he responded.

            Kimmi shot him a look and snorted, "I know, they're insane."

            Phil just chuckled and said back, "Now I am happy you were only suspended for a day or else I'd have to go without that sparkling wit. So what happen? For you to practically kill Izaac, I mean?"

            God, this was so embarrassing! She really wished their school wasn't so small so that gossip wouldn't carry quite as fast. She darted her eyes around to not meet his. "Look, I don't really wanna talk about it. Let's play basketball alright," she offered. Then she headed over to the court by her driveway, snatching up a ball.

            Phil followed, calling, "Fine but if I win you gotta tell me what happened."

            Kimmi dribbled the ball a few times in place. "And if I win?" she questioned.

            Phil grinned and replied, "I'll make out with you."

            Kimmi laughed and then shook her head. "How about I just don't have to tell you?" she countered.

            The boy nodded and said, "That works too."

            Then they started to play, pretty much an even match. Even if Kimmi was a girl, and therefore in Phil's mind less athletic, she was the best on her all girl's team. Phil was pretty much the best on his team as well, so when they played they usually ended up tied to the last basket, with Tommy left somewhere behind in the dust, because Tommy was a football guy and not very good at basketball. Soon the light was dying against the skyline, outlining them in blue and black. 

Kimmi shot and scored the final and winning basket. She leapt in the air and swung a fist up. "I won, I won! I am the queen of the world!" she whooped.

Phil was panting, his arms bent at his sides. "I let you win," he retorted.

Kimmi rolled her eyes and quipped, "You always say that." She was trying to catch her breath too and sat down on the basketball, keeping it in place with her feet.

            "And it's always true," he shot back with a smirk.

            Kimmi grinned up at him smugly and scoffed, "Shut up and admit a girl can wipe the floor with you already."

            Phil slid down onto his butt; his legs sprawled out and bent in front of him, his hands resting on his knees. "Fine, you win. You are the queen of the world. You happy now?" he sighed, rolling his eyes.

            Kimmi smiled and responded, "Very. You hungry or something? My parents could order us pizza." 

            The boy just shook his head and replied, "No I'm fine. Besides, you think that's wise asking for food after the stunt you pulled in school? Only bread and water for you, missy. And it's dirty water, and its all crusts."

             Kimmi stifled a laugh and raised her hand exaggeratingly into the air. "You creeps!" she joked. Then the smile slid from her face, as she looked off, at the darkening sky heavy with the vague shape of a yellow moon. There was a fluid silence surrounding them before Kimmi started, her voice soft, "You know what happened? I saw Izaac in the hall and I went up and told him I'm no Mary and he can go shove it. Well he said, "You are. All you do is play sports and hang with guys all day, I'm pretty sure you're just a boy with longer hair. You get straight A's so I'm pretty sure you don't have a life either. And then there's the way you act like you're so pure when you're just a prude. I mean, you've probably never even kissed a boy before. Have you? Have you?" And then he said something about wanting to show me how it was done or something, but I had it by then and I just... I just punched him so hard in the face his nose starting bleeding and he started crying." 

            Phil could feel the anger in him surfacing and he grinned spitefully. "You made him cry? That's my girl," he replied.

            Then she was looking up at him with her wide chocolate eyes and her face looked regretful and sad. "But, its true isn't it, Phil? I am. I mean, look at me. All I ever do is play sports or work on my homework. It's like, I'm a boy! I mean, I never go to the mall or paint my nails or do anything girly," she admitted. 

            Phil didn't know what was going on, this wasn't like the Kimmi he knew. The Kimmi he knew was quietly self-assured and always right and never let what others' thought affect her. For some reason, he could tell this was different; this was something she'd been thinking about for a while, even before stupid Izaac had made his dumb comment. "Hey, I like you the way you are! At least you're no airhead," he responded protectively, his eyebrows knitted.

            She smiled bitterly and breathed, "Nope, not that. Never. I'm the tough firecracker with the funny comments and always up for a game of b-ball. I'm the girl every boy wants for a friend and _just_ a friend." 

            Phil was searching her face now, looking confused. "What's so bad about that?" he questioned in his raspy voice.

            When Kimmi gazed over at him he couldn't believe he saw her tearing up, her eyes flickering like glass. When she spoke again, she didn't think she should be saying it, she was letting out too much, but she just couldn't make herself care anymore. Kimmi shouted, "Because I want it! I want what the airheads have, what every other girl except me has! I want the longing glances and the walking on the beach and the holding hands and the kisses! I've never even been kissed, Phil! Ever. I've never been kissed -" 

            And then, just like that, Phil kissed her. Before she even realized it or had a chance to react, his lips were pressed to hers and the air was incited with little electric currents like hot wires. Kimmi stared ahead, surprised, and then her eyelashes slid closed and she just kissed back. He was leaning over now and his hands rested on her bare knees and her arms ran nervously up to his shoulders. She didn't know what to do and then, it didn't matter, because everything just felt natural. Like his nose and his lips were made to fit hers, and her thoughts and doubts all stopped slurring in her brain. 

            Phil's lips parted from hers and he sat back, staring ahead. He was breathing heavy and his eyes were wide now. "I uh, gotta go," he spluttered quickly and then shot up, taking off in a run towards his house down the block.

            Kimmi sat on the basketball, staring ahead, pressing her lips together. There was everything swimming in her dazed head, shock and wonderment and... a _warmness _she'd never felt before. Phil was Phil, yes, and they were just friends. But she knew after today, she'd never be able to believe that again.

--

            The light in Tommy's room was still glowing, the night sky collapsing outside. Lillian was sitting at a chair by his desk, looking over a textbook and facing him. She was still dressed in a black skirt and a long sleeved white shirt, her hair falling over her shoulders. "Ok, we just have one more group of formulas to go over so I'll write you up some flash cards ok," she said business-like and then looked up from the book at him.

            Tommy was sitting on the edge of his bed, crumpling paper into balls to shoot at his wastebasket. He was wearing jeans and a dark blue shirt. "We've been studying for hours! Isn't it time for you to leave yet?" he said sarcastically and missed a shot. It wasn't like he didn't want to spend time with Lillian, of course he did and honestly probably more then he should have. It was just that they'd been at this for a long time now and really had only been talking about Chemistry until his brain felt like mush in his head.

            Lillian rolled her eyes and smiled slightly. "Well, gee, thanks for enjoying my company. And studying for hours is a good thing, at least we'll be sure you get a good grade on this test," she retorted. 

            Tommy gave up trying to sink paper baskets and lay back on his bed, his hands under his head. He sighed grudgingly, "Good grades are overrated."

            The girl gave him an understanding but stern stare and responded sharply, "Tommy."

            Tommy nodded his dark hair, admitting, "Ok, you're right. And while you're doing that I'll just rest a little bit." Then he closed his eyes, football practice always made him feel tired. He usually went to bed at 8:00 during game season, which was embarrassing to admit, and it was already 8:15.

            Lillian still stared at him and couldn't help but grin. Her lips parted when she exclaimed, "You're going to sleep!"

            With his eyes still closed and a smile spreading on his face, he remarked, "No I'm not."

            The girl laughed and shouted, "Your eyes are closed!"

            Tommy remained with his eyes pressed shut. "I study better that way," he responded, knowing he was mocking her now. And so what? Maybe he wanted Ms. Perfect to drop the Chemistry for a while and act human, like she had those days ago at Phil's house. Even if it was just in private and tomorrow he'd be invisible to her again, when she sauntered around with her airhead friends.

            While he was waiting for a reaction, a pillow suddenly collided with a thud against his head. Tommy's eyes snapped open now with shock and he looked over at Lillian, who was smiling innocently. "Uh oh. You sure you wanna do that? Because then I won't be responsible for my actions -" he began to warn, propped half up on his elbow.

            Lillian merely smirked deviously and throttled another pillow from the chair at him, hard. He managed to catch it and raise an eyebrow, grinning. "You did it now! It's on!" he exclaimed and tossed it back at her. It pegged her in the chest gently and she gasped with laughter before snatching up another pillow and hurling it at him. Tommy shifted his head and dodged the flying pillow. Wow, he'd never even realized he _had_ this many pillows in his room before. 

            Then when he looked over again, she was approaching, the last pillow held in her grasp, brandishing it like a weapon. "Ha! You should be afraid now!" she chortled with a wicked smile. 

            Tommy snickered teasingly, "O no, it's a twenty pound stick with arms. I'm so scared." 

            Her face flashed with mock indignant and she cried, "You're so dead, mister!" Raising the pillow over her head, she was laughing when his arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her down on him. Lillian fell on him with a gasp of laughter and he used his other hand to hold her wrists over her head, the pillow slipping from her grip. Her bare legs tangled up in his and he could feel her breathing. 

            "Unfair! Illegal move!" she proclaimed, her face just inches from his now, her eyelashes almost brushing his skin.

            Tommy was smiling up at her now and he responded, "We'll have to consult the rulebooks on that one. Oh look, its allowed and I win. Woo."

             Lillian just rolled her eyes and huffed jokingly, "Man, if you play on the field the same way you fight then you really are right, you must suck."

            The boy smirked and retorted, "Funny, funny lady."

            Lillian's eyes dragged over his face and suddenly the air caught around them with silence. The smiles grew fuzzy and vague until they couldn't even pretend everything was normal. It was like they were both realizing the closeness of each other's skin, the shared breathes between them. Her sandy brown hair spilled over his chest and he was unable to stop staring, letting her wrists slip from his grasp. The girl flushed slightly and pulled her hands down to rest on either side of his head. For some reason, she couldn't bring herself to move. There was something in his eyes, frayed ends of something she could connect with. And his lips, they were so close now she could almost feel them already, glossing over hers. She wanted to so bad, just feel him under her and a sensation of warmth that she knew would creep under her skin. She blinked and then her rational thoughts were too throbbing in her skull and she rolled off him.  

            Sitting up, Lillian began frantically tucking hair behind her ears and forcing on a strained smile. "Ok, so no flash cards then. Let's just study from the book, ok," she rasped. 

            Tommy's eyes followed hers and he rose up to sit by her. He dropped his gaze from her, replying, "Ok." Then she got up to grab the textbook and he suddenly thought of something. "Do your friends know you're here?" he questioned abruptly.

            Lillian walked back over with the book and laughed a little to avoid the question. "That has nothing to do with Chemistry," she objected.

            Tommy was now staring at her intently, knowingly, and replied, "Ok. Then according to the nuclear formula for a compound, do your friends know you're here?"

            She sat by him and started flipping through the pages absently. "No. Its not like this is any of their business -" she tried to reason, even when she knew he knew the real reason just as well as she did.

            She could still feel his eyes on her, pained and regretful. "Oh. I see," he said as evenly as he could. Then he looked to the book and continued, "Well let's study."

            Lillian stared at him and finally sighed, "Tommy, please, stop looking at me like I ran over your puppy ok." God, why'd he have to do that? Always try to make her feel bad for who she was and what she did? It wasn't her fault, ok, it wasn't!

            His eyes flared up at her and he responded, a little too quickly and harsh, "I'm sorry but I wasn't looking at you in any other way then normal. Maybe it's your guilty conscious, telling you how much you screwed me over. _Us_ over. Because we all use to be friends and now you're too good to hang out with us." He didn't think he'd say any of this; he just wanted to study and then get her out of his house. Well, that wasn't true, but still, he thought he could try and not care anymore. It wasn't like he was _crushed_ or anything because she didn't want to be his friend... No, if he really wanted to be honest, he was crushed because she didn't feel for him the way he felt for her.

            Lillian looked adamant as she denied, "That's not true! I never said that -"

            Tommy responded, "You don't need to, Lil." Then he shook his head, throwing his hands up. "I mean Lillian! God! Because ignoring us is enough, we get the hint ok! You have new better friends now; you don't need to hang with us. Just stop trying to act like nothings changed when everything has," he scoffed angrily. 

            Lillian could feel the need to defend herself and her voice rose when she snapped, "Well what about you guys huh? Did any of you call me over the summer, just to ask what was going on? No! And I'm not the bad guy here! I'm _not_. Just because I want to make new friends and expand socially. Maybe you all should too and stop trying to act like you're so superior to me because you don't care about the same things I do. Because fine, I care about popularity and pleasing people and how I look and what I wear and every other thing you think is so stupid! But that doesn't make me a bad person! And I..." Her voice trailed off under a deep breath and she closed her eyes, trying to gather herself. "This was a bad idea. I need to go," she finished, regaining the Ms. Perfect veneer she always wore so well.

            Tommy glared at her and responded coldly, "Yea, I think you do too."

            Lillian scowled and stood, tossing the book on his bed. "Fine, bye. Good luck on your test," she replied equally as detached. Then she strode out the door and he could hear her making her way along the hall and out of his house. 

            The sky was too dark now, too floating and isolating. The moon was a thread of silver splitting the black open. As Lillian stormed down the road, briskly walking home, she couldn't help but typhoon with thoughts. Who did he think he was? Who did they think they were? She didn't need a guilt trip, everyone else could become popular so why was it not ok for her? Because she didn't want to be held up to their high standards anymore, like they expected better of her or something. Because maybe she was just one of those girls they hated and maybe they needed to get over it already. So what if all she cared about was stupid stuff they thought was trivial, then maybe they should stop giving her their looks of betrayal and just move on already. But as she sucked in the cool fingers of frost, there was something lurching in her. A dull pain that told her what she knew, that maybe she really didn't care about that stuff and she was just going along with it to please her new crowd. That maybe no one would ever know her better then her old friends and she _had _betrayed them. That maybe she was the one who just couldn't move on because there was a part of her that didn't want to.

            When she brushed up her fingers to push away her hair, she could feel a slick wet on her fingertips and didn't understand why. 

--  
  


**Closing Notes: **Ok well, new changes a plenty! Chuckie finally stood up to Angelica. Wee, go you! Let's see if that has any affect on how she treats him from now on. Phil kissed Kimmi and then ran away. Will this mess with their friendship? Will they just deny it? And Tommy told Lillian off and visa versa. There is something clearly going on between them but they just can't admit it because of their current situation and hostility towards one another. What's going on with Lillian? Its like she has one foot in with Angelica and those friends and another foot with her old friends, like she's trying to be popular but still can't let her old friends go. What will happen next? Only time will tell! Please review, you make my day!


	5. Chapter Five: Some Angel, Some Devil

**Author's Notes: **Ok, well I do not own **Rugrats**, only **Nick **does. This story is about what happens with the group enters high school and they've had to grow apart. In Lil's case, she's turned into another Angelica! Ok, now please read and review!

**Splintered Reflections**

By Heather [TinySweetHeart]

--

Chapter Five: Some Angel, Some Devil 

Some devil is stuck inside of me  
I cannot set it free  
I wish, I wish I was dead and you were grieving  
Just so that you could know  
Some angel is stuck inside of me

-- "Some Devil" -- Dave Matthews --

--

       Phil and Kimmi walked into Freshman hallway wordlessly. This was how most of their morning had been actually, awkward and quiet. If they really wanted to say the reason, it was because neither one wanted to be the first to talk about what happened last night. So the blank quiet worked.

         "So uh, you do all your homework?" Kimmi finally questioned. She knew the quiet was a little too obvious something was wrong and maybe, she was hoping Phil would talk about what happened last night. The kiss that had left her confused. She was wearing loose white pants and a black tank top with black flip flops, her hair held back in a ponytail. 

         Phil didn't even look at her as he replied, "Yea. You?" He was dressed in dark jeans and a yellow logo tee shirt. They came to his locker first and he hurriedly opened it, peering in it.

         Kimmi leaned against a row of lockers and nodded. "Yup," she said. As Phil glanced around for books, the silence came back heavier then ever. 

         After a few minutes, they heard someone call out, "Hey, guys!" They turned their heads to see Tommy coming down the hallway, smiling to them sleepily. He was wearing jeans and a gray long sleeved shirt.

         "Hey," they each greeted in turn as Tommy came to stand by Kimmi. They were quiet again, Phil shoving his head back into his locker and Kimmi staring down at her bare toes. 

         Tommy wrinkled his brow and commented in a confused tone, "Ok, weird."

         Phil glared over at him and asked innocently, "What?"

         The boy looked from Phil and Kimmi suspiciously. "There's actual silence. You guys are never quiet," he retorted matter-of-factly.

         Kimmi bit her lip and suggested weakly, "I'm tired."

         Phil immediately started nodding. "Yea, me too. So tired. Like dead tired. Really really tired," he rambled hurriedly.

         Tommy raised his eyebrows questioningly and merely responded, "Uh... Ok. Anyway."

         The other boy was quick to change topics and smile over at Tommy as he rummaged through his locker. "Hey, what you do to my sister yesterday?" he asked.

         Now it was Tommy's turn to play dumb as he raised his shoulders and responded bluntly, "What?"  
  


         Phil slammed his locker shut, hefting his backpack up higher on his shoulders. He smirked at Tommy and rolled his eyes. "I know about your study date, pal. She came home last night in a freaking Ice Queen mode and when I asked her where she was and what had crawled up her butt to die, she said she was at your house, trying to help you with Chemistry. And that it was the biggest mistake of her life, or something like that. So again, what you do? Because whatever it was, bravo, buddy. I've been trying to piss her off like that for months," he explained.

         Tommy just shook his head and threw up his hands. "I didn't do anything! She was the one who was trying to act all friendly to me again, like nothing even changed. And then, get this, she even told me it was our fault! Because we didn't call her over the summer or anything. Give me a break," he snorted, even when he felt a little guilty ping in his stomach.

         Phil narrowed his eyes and shot angrily, "What a whiny liar! I lived in the same house with her; I think I had to talk to her once in awhile. She can't blame us for getting brainwashed, it's all her own fault."

         Kimmi face fell and she looked ahead, thinking to herself. "Wait. You guys, I don't know. I mean, did any of us really call her or ask her to hang? Because I know I'm not the girliest person and Lil and I never really were into shopping trips or anything. Phil, Tommy, and I would just go off to play sports and well, she was left behind. With my brother, who, while I love him, is content with just sitting at home and reading a book. Maybe... maybe she's right," she relinquished softly.

         Phil whirled his head to glower at her disbelieving. He cracked, "What! Ok, are you becoming an Angelica-bot too? Because I refuse to take the blame for what happened with Lil. Its not like we were the one's making her join cheerleading and going to all those drinking parties and everything."

         Kimmi nodded slightly and went on to say, "I know. I was just saying, maybe we didn't make her feel like she was a part of us anymore. I mean, I use to call her all the time at night to just talk, about school and stuff. And then it seemed like we had less and less to talk about before, well, I just stopped calling." 

          Tommy stayed quiet during the exchange but he was caught up in a storm of doubt. Had he even... really started feeling anything for Lil, before she became Lillian? Before she changed and everyone else started noticing her too? Did he like her when she was just a tomboy with a ponytail and dirty jeans? He told himself he had, that he always had, but there was a stillborn doubt pushing into him that said he didn't. He finally remarked to quiet his fears, "It's not our fault. She was one of my best friends and now, she acts like she's too popular to know me. That's not my fault."

         They stayed staring at each other for a moment before Tommy noticed Lillian walking down the hall. He couldn't help his eyes from following her and Phil and Kimmi both looked behind them to see her. Lillian gazed over at them and her breath caught in her throat a little and her petal lips parted slightly. She was dressed in dark jeans and a stripped blouse with short sleeves. Her hazel eyes snagged onto Tommy's and she blinked away the daze. Then she glanced over at Brett to her right and smiled and forced out a laugh. They continued strolling down the hall and she couldn't help her eyes from sliding to the side to glance back at Tommy.

         Tommy scowled to himself and shook his head. "I'm going to my homeroom," he said unreadably and then walked away. 

         Phil stared ahead, knowing full well what was bothering Tommy. Then his glance shifted to Kimmi and he started to say to fill the space, "So, uh..."

         Kimmi met his eyes and hurriedly replied, "Look, Phil, what happened yesterday, we need to talk about it. Because this awkwardness is killing me and I want to be friends with you still."

         Phil nodded in agreement and rushed out, "Yea me too. So what happened yesterday, _didn't_. Ok. Because I wouldn't want to risk our friendship over some stupid _thing_. Right?" His voice sounded less then certain but he was sure it was what she'd say anyway, because I mean, _they_ were a stupid idea. There was no _they_, Phil and Kimmi would always just be good friends. Because anything else would be illogical and wrong and risky.

         Kimmi stared with wide eyes and blinked back surprise. "Yea," she breathed.

         Phil looked down then and tried to change subjects. "So, we going to get those tickets Sunday?" he asked.

         Kimmi was glaring off, at the farthest areas of the hall, at all her hurt and embarrassment. "Yea," she responded painstakingly before finishing, her voice dazed, "I'm going to go." Then she pushed past him to their homeroom, hoping he wouldn't follow. Another boy who just wanted to be friends, she'd always be just a friend. Kimmi Finister, every boy's "just friend". Other girls could be complete snobs and jerks and they got every guy, like Lillian and Angelica who didn't even have to try. But Kimmi was nice and easy to get along with and funny and "just a friend". Suddenly she didn't want to be in her own skin any more.  

         Phil watched after her and thought how strange it was he'd just done that to spare their friendship and now he got the feeling it had still been damaged. He decided then that whatever happened, he couldn't let this occur again. Because harming Kimmi felt like the worst thing he could do and if he never got to be her friend again that would be too hard. What had happened, that was just stupid and him not thinking and it couldn't happen again. He swallowed down all his mixed feelings and walked away.

--

         Chuckie was tunneling his way through the masses of students in the hallway, trying to not trip. He was dressed in faded jeans and a black band shirt that had actually belonged to his dad when Mr. Finister was a teenager and into his rock stage. He heard some snickering and a girl call out snidely, "Hey, Freckles Finister, where'd you get that outfit? Salvation Army or out of someone's trash?" This was of course followed by more splutters of giggles.

         The boy turned around, rolling his eyes. As suspected, Angelica and her gang of cheerleaders all stood near some lockers, stifling their smirks at him. Remembering his newfound courage, he sighed loudly for everyone to hear, "Angelica, why don't you go get a hobby or something? Because making fun of me is getting old. And here's an idea, I _don't_ actually care what you or your giggling ditz friends say about me. So, yea, sink that into your half-brained head -"

         As he spoke people stopped to gawk at him. Was someone actually telling off Ms Priss and her groupies? That was unheard of! Angelica's blue eyes exploded wide and she stormed foreword, gripping his upper arm and yanking him into the nearest doorway, the hallway girls' bathroom. Luckily there was no one in it at this time, which was usually the case, and Angelica shoved Chuckie up against the wall by the door, her nails still digging into him. "Ok, what the Hell do you think you're doing!" she shouted, her face close to his. She was wearing black pants and a red frilly blouse, her blonde hair down in waves. 

         Chuckie shook her hand off him and shrugged to annoy her. "Trying to get to class," he retorted.

         Angelica's eyes slanted dangerously and she seethed, "You know what I mean, idiot! You use to be such a sniveling, little... wimp! What happened? Why'd you suddenly, you know, grow a backbone?"

         Chuckie met her gaze fearlessly and responded coldly, "I didn't change, I'm finally just realizing what I should have known all along and what you'd be well to find out too. That you're really not as scary and tough as you think you are." 

         This only made the girl's eyebrows swing up like arcs and her voice rise with frustration and vulnerability. "Stop! Stop this right now, this whole talking back thing and standing up for yourself!" she snapped.

          Chuckie grabbed her arms then gingerly and swerved her around so her back was now pressed to the cold tile and her body was under his. She tried to shrink from his touch and pull as far from him as possible, trying to pretend like his grip was revolting. "No can do, Princess," he said with a smirk. His eyes locked with hers before he pulled back and started walking towards the door. "Your car fixed yet?" he questioned abruptly.

         Angelica was still standing against the wall, trying to hide her breathlessness. "No," she spat at him.

         The boy nodded and responded simply, "Then I'm giving you a ride home."

         Angelica's crimson lips slipped with a taunting smile and she scoffed, "Yea right. In your dreams, Finister."

         Chuckie just looked back and grinned slightly. "Don't flatter yourself, Angelica, and stop making everything difficult. I'm driving you home," he replied. 

         Then he passed through the swinging door and Angelica watched him leave with a burning glare. Yes, she was sure of it now, he was the most annoying boy on the face of the planet. What was he trying to prove by standing up to her? How dare he, didn't he know his role? Well, she'd show him. She'd broken tougher guys then Finister and she was sure it was only a matter of time.

--

         At football practice that afternoon, the sun was obstructed by tiptoeing gray clouds. The taste of a dying summer was in the air as the boys hustled around a drying field. The cheerleading squad practiced nearby and watched them. They were playing against their teammates and Tommy had been doing pretty good until he got tackled hard by a bigger Senior. Their coach shouted, "Pickles, the bench! Now!"

         Tommy grimaced and ran over to the bench, sitting down and sliding off his helmet. He could hear the cheerleaders sneering behind him and then his cousin's voice as she remarked, "Oh look, its the team's official bench warmer."

         He turned around to glare at them and the girls all hid their giggles behind their hands. Angelica just smirked at him openly and raised her shoulders. Lillian was by her side and her face was a mask of cold when she called out abruptly, staring at him the whole time, "I know. Guys like him shouldn't even be on the team." It wasn't true and she knew it and she just wanted to make him feel pain, the kind she'd been sinking in lately. 

         Tommy's eyes shifted to meet her gaze and he retorted, "Don't you have some type of cheer to do? Practice spelling or something." Suddenly he realized this was turning into some kind of verbal war between them, see who could inflict the most wounds on the other.

         Lillian's stare was challenging and hurtful. "Sure do. L – O – S – E – R. What's that spell? Loser," she responded flatly. The other girls around her creased in giggles and Lillian ignored them, still locking eyes with Tommy.

         "Practice's over! Let's work on this defense next time, ladies," the coach suddenly shouted, ending the skirmish. Tommy turned and grabbed up his helmet, standing to walk towards the parking lot. He could hear his other teammates far behind and then someone's footsteps over the grass. Lillian neared him and saddled up to his side, her pom poms slack in her arms. 

         "You think I'm a snob? Fine, I'll prove you right then, Tommy," she said in a hushed voice before she walked past him. She glanced back at him once, her moss eyes pressing with hardness, before she turned again. She walked over to Brett who was waiting for her up ahead, dressed in his football uniform. He smiled at her and said something Tommy couldn't hear before he slid an arm around her waist and they headed off to the parking lot together. Tommy glared down at the ground and the shapes of shadows. 

--

         After they dropped off Tommy, the silence was still lingering in the car. Angelica remained staring out the window and they did not speak for stretching minutes. Finally she sighed exaggeratedly and glared at him sharply. "Ok, look, fine. You need to think you've suddenly hit puberty and are a man? Good for you. Just no smart remarks in front of my friends," she abruptly stated. 

         Chuckie kept looking ahead and raised an eyebrow. "Huh, that sounded close to a bargain to me. You afraid the word will get out? That you're not a monster after all," he responded with a slight grin.

         Angelica was not amused and narrowed her eyes at him, exclaiming, "Fine have it your way! You wanna challenge me, Chuckie Finister? Because you haven't even seen me mad yet, pal!"  
  


         The boy rolled his mahogany eyes and remarked, "I'm so scared. Whatya gonna do? Attack me with your pom poms?"

         Angelica fixed him with her stare of death before leaning over to reach towards the radio huffily. Chuckie quickly interjected, "Angelica, I told you to leave that alone. It's my radio and my car and I'll listen to the music I want." 

         The girl swirled her eyes back on him to release what sounded like a growl but she slid back into her seat, crossing her arms dejectedly. "You call this music? All I hear is one guitar and a guy whining," she spat.

         Chuckie stared out the windshield and laughed, "Right. And what great music do you listen to? Britney Spears?"

         Angelica looked at him flatly and huffed, "No! Well... That's not all I listen to alright. I have a **Death Cab For Cutie** cd and the newest **Dashboard Confessional** ok. I'm eclectic. So shove that in your pipe and smoke it." Ha, that should throw him for a loop.

         The boy nodded approvingly and raised his eyebrows. "Ok, ignoring the out-dated comeback from the 1950s, I am mildly impressed. You just stumble onto that music while looking for an N'Sync album?" he inquired.

         She shook her head of flaxen hair and retorted, "No, alright. One of my ex boyfriends was into all that crap, ok. I'm not proud of that."

         Chuckie sniggered to himself and said, "Wow, amazing you'd even date him. So what, he bought you those cds?"

         Angelica turned to gaze out the window, at the passing flickers of white sun. "No. After we broke up... I bought them. Because a lot of the songs reminded me of him," she responded, breathing in deeply. Ok, and why had she just said that? Yuck, no one should find out about that, like ever. It had been that guy she dated who was a college Freshman, and he was into all that alternative and punk and stuff. Before he cheated on her and left her, before she realized she had been in love with him. Before she thought she'd never want another boyfriend again because it hurt too much and it made you feel too much.

         Chuckie glanced at her in surprise and then smiled. "Alert the media, Angelica _does_ have a heart!" he proclaimed.

         Angelica turned back to him to glare with loathing and pouted, "Shove it, Finister. If you tell anyone about that I'll kill you. Really painfully."

         He drove up her driveway and put the gear in park. As he did so he chuckled and teased, "I'll die a slow death of chocking on glitter and going insane from watching Legally Blonde one and two."

         She was looking at him through her gilded eyelashes when she responded in a low voice, "I hate you."

         Chuckie met her gaze and smiled faintly. "I know," he replied.

         God, that stupid smirk. She just wanted to wipe it off his face, and before she knew what she was doing, she was leaning over and pressing her lips to his. He stared ahead with wide eyes and she did as well, not believing what she was doing. It was just a brushing of lips against lips, his shocked release of breath spilling over her skin. Well at least that stupid smirk was gone now. Then she pulled back quickly and her eyebrows were near her hairline when she blurted, "I uh... That didn't happen!" Then she opened the door and sprinted from his car as fast as her legs would take her, slamming the door in his face.

--

  
**Closing Notes: **Yes and I'm not trying to make Angelica all sappy or anything. I actually rather like her a little snobby and mean. I have decided to make Chuckie braver and able to stick up for himself, I'd like to think he would as he grew up. Kimmi and Phil are deciding on the friend route for now, let's see how long that lasts. I have to say, awww poor Kimmi! Hee. And Lillian and Tommy aren't even friends! He's beginning to wonder if he even noticed her before she became who she is now or if he's just as bad as everyone else. (Also, I am _not _making up any excuses for Lillian and how she became a snob. There will _not _be any "Ooo it's not her fault! They didn't try hard enough to keep her as a friend." Sorry no, its her actions and she had a choice. That doesn't mean her old friends can't start to feel a little guilty but yes, that will pass. I just wanted to clear that up because there is no way I'd do that, I'd hate to have to read a story like that myself.) More to come shortly! Please review this, it makes my day you guys.                


	6. Chapter Six: A Cold Gray

**Author's Notes: **Ok, well I do not own **Rugrats**, only **Nick **does. This story is about what happens with the group enters high school and they've had to grow apart. In Lil's case, she's turned into another Angelica! Ok, now please read and review!

**Extra Note: **Hey! Guess what? I have a wallpaper for you, lucky people you! Since I have been going crazy because every time I start to write this story I immediately think of the characters on "**Everwood**", I figured I'd annoy you guys with it too! Haa. Really, if they were real people and in high school, this is how I'd see the Rats. It's like them in living color! This is a wallpaper I made because I was just playing around with Photoshop and yea, its set up like scenes from this chapter. So take a look please! Since they don't allow websites to be listed in fanfics, please go over to my profile and I have my fanfics/graphics site on there. Not a plug, I swear! Well, it is, but for a good reason. ^-^ Tell me that's not freaky? The similarities are crazy! Maybe that's why I instantly liked "**Everwood"** because it's a teenage "**Rugrats**"! Except the characters act well, exactly the opposite but well, you know. 

**Splintered Reflections**

By Heather [TinySweetHeart]

--

Chapter Six: A Cold Gray 
    
    Oh there's a loneliness inside her
    
    And she'd do anything to fill it in
    
    And though its red blood bleeding from her now
    
    Felt like cold blue ice in her heart
    
    When all the colors mixed together to gray

-- "Gray Street" -- Dave Matthews Band --

--

         The sun was still a vague gray object in the sky as they waited outside in the early morning. Kids were lined up down the block, maybe they should have come a little earlier but then again, waking up any time before eight on a Sunday was crazy talk. Wind laced with a chill scattered over the streets, bringing in a strange icy front. Kimmi was wearing a thin purple sweater and fitted dark jeans, her hair held back in a small headband. "Ok, how can it be this cold? Because it's still the end of August and last I checked that was the hottest month of the year," she complained and crossed her arms together.

         Chuckie was staring ahead, at the dark ticket windows that hopefully would light up any minute now. Chuckie was dressed in a gray sweatshirt and jeans. "On the news it said it's going to be a bogus year for weather, like freak cold and hot days and stuff. Plus, its early morning. So yea, that does happen, Kim," he replied. Chuckie had thought about becoming a weatherman a few times actually and kept up on the news unlike his friends who could care less.

         Kimmi just sighed and shrugged. "I don't even care really. It's keeping me awake... because my eyelids are frozen open," she retorted.

         Phil stood in front of them, crossing his arms as well to keep warm in just a tee shirt layered over a long sleeved shirt and jeans. He turned to face them and smiled cheesily. "You're so hot you can't be cold," he said jokingly. Kimmi shot him a dismayed look and he added, "What? Didn't work?" 

         The girl laughed and said, "Nope."

         Phil furrowed his brow like he was thinking before trying again, "Are those pants made of mirrors?"

         Kimmi smiled and rolled her eyes. "Nope, not that either," she chimed.

         Phil shook his head and mumbled, "Damn it. I really need to work on some new pick up lines."

         Chuckie was standing behind them, towering above them slightly. He chuckled and remarked, "Yea, you do, dude. I don't know how you nabbed Abbey, unless she's big on clichés."

          Kimmi's dark eyes reeled and she swallowed air. _Abbey? _"Abbey? Abbey... Keller? The girl who told Chuckie she liked you?" she questioned as unreadable as she could.

         Phil looked a little regretful and he nodded, squinting into the pale gray of the sky. "Yea. I was going to tell you..." he began. 

         She tried to pretend she didn't just taste a flavor of shock and grief, that her eyes weren't glassing over. "You're dating her," she stated.

         Chuckie gave her a little nudge in her back and exclaimed, "Isn't that great, sis? Abbey's so awesome and so pretty. Score for our buddy, Romeo!"

         Kimmi was silent in return; she couldn't say anything without showing too much. Phil was looking at her when he said, "We just went out on one date Saturday. I don't even know if I'll go out with her again -"

          She could hear Chuckie laugh behind her and snort, "What! You said you had a great time! You just had to call me and tell me all about it, Phil. Really trying to make me jealous huh?"

         Phil glared over at him and responded flatly, "It wasn't that great. It was ok. I don't even know if I like her." She knew what he was doing, trying to soften the blow on her, and it made her feel even worse. Because she didn't want his... pity. God, really, she was _fine_. She was fine, and maybe if she kept repeating that in her head this stupid woozy feeling would go away.

         Chuckie just smirked and rolled his eyes. "Whatever. If you don't, I know plenty of guys waiting in line, me included," he said.

         Phil's eyes were on Kimmi though when she forced on a smile and commented in a taut voice, "Yea. That's so great, Phil. I'm sure you'll make such a _cute_ couple." 

         Phil's gaze flickered over her face before he turned around again, not able to look at the hurt and anger floating in her eyes anymore. Kimmi just stared off into the slate horizon, glaring, her arms still crossed. She _was_ angry; angry at Phil for leaning over that night and kissing her and filling her head with thoughts that he might actually like her when now she realized he never would. Chuckie stood behind them, completely clueless.

         Finally the ticket booth flickered with light and then the line began to move. It was another fifteen minutes before they reached the front and Phil handed the woman his money. "Four tickets please," he said.

         Chuckie stood near Phil and added to the woman, "Make that five."

         Phil shot him a questioning look and asked, "Wha? Who else is going?"

         Chuckie fought to not flush pink and he stared at his friend. "Angelica," he stated.

         The boy's eyes swelled wide and he threw his hands up in repulsion. "What! No way do I want to spend time with that snob, Chuckie! Come on!" he shouted.

         Chuckie gave him an exasperated look and actually didn't back down. He sighed, "Look, Phil, you don't have to spend time with her ok, we'll just stay to ourselves. But don't go around bashing her around me anymore."

         Phil was a little taken aback. Had... Chuckie actually said that to him? There were too many things wrong with this situation right now. Phil just scowled and responded, "Well fine."

         The woman behind the counter by now was giving them glares of annoyance. She began to rip out tickets when Kimmi said, "Make that six tickets." She was standing far back behind the boys, frowning and not even motioning to stand closer to them.

         Phil swung around to look at her and cry sarcastically, "Great! Who else we inviting? Why not the whole school?"

         Kimmi met his eyes with a hard stare and then pushed past him, dumping her money on the counter. "It's none of your business," she said icily and then turned and walked back towards the car, leaving the two boys to grab the tickets.

--

         The gray morning turned into a gray day, seeming to cover the whole town in a haze of discolor. Bleak Sundays were the worst because there was nothing to do on them but stand around and think. Lillian was at her part time job, wiping down the counter of Café Le France and getting lost in her own thoughts while they had barely any customers. She was still too young to _legally _get a job but her mother was related to the owners, a second cousin or something, and they were happy to let her work here on the weekends. Lillian only wanted it to be able to afford all the expensive clothing her friends wore because unlike them, her parents didn't just hand her a credit card and tell her to go on shopping sprees. She was dressed in a long sleeved gray shirt and black pants, her longish chestnut hair collapsing over her shoulders. 

         When she looked up, she noticed someone sitting in a booth in the corner who she must have not seen come in. Quickly she wiped her hands on her apron and walked over. "Can I help you?" she greeted.

         The dark haired girl looked up and smiled awkwardly. "Hey, Lillian. It's me, Kimmi Finister," she said. 

         Lillian grinned back a little surprised and responded with a laugh, "Hey. I think I'd remember you, Kimmi. So what's up?" She slid into the booth by Kimmi, there wasn't very many people in there anyway except for the old man who always came in every morning.

         Kimmi shrugged and fingered the edge of the menu. "Nothing. Just hanging out. How's work?" she replied.

         Lillian shrugged in return and said, "You know, the usual. Boring and mindless but oh well, all I care about is the paycheck." Lillian's eyes drifted to the tabletop and Kimmi's did as well, an uncomfortable silence falling over them. It felt like they hadn't spoken in years. God, they really hadn't talked in a long time, they had no idea what was going on in each other's lives any more and that felt strange and sad.

         Lillian finally coughed and began, "So, uh, if you need more time to decide I can be right back -"

         Kimmi shook her head and started to say hurriedly, "No, I know what I want. No, I mean, I came here to ask you something. We just got those Boxcar Racer tickets this morning and I know you wanted to go because Phil told me. I grabbed an extra one for you so you can just pay me back, or not, I don't care. But it would be awesome if you'd go with us to like hang out."

         Lillian's hazel eyes were wide, she didn't expect Kimmi to ever want to talk to her again after... after she'd just up and ditched them. "Do the rest of the guys know too?" she breathed.

         Kimmi shook her head and replied, "Not really, but I'm sure they wouldn't mind."

         Lillian felt a tinge of regret and stood up, turning to begin to wipe off another table nearby, to not have to look at Kimmi and met her hopeful stare. "I don't know if Tommy told you but we got into a pretty huge fight the night I went over to help him study. So I don't think it's a good idea for me to go, we might kill each other," she said as an excuse and added a laugh.

         "He did tell me. He also told me what it was about. And that's..." Kimmi began to say and then went on, slowly, "That's part of the reason I'm here. Because I've been thinking and you're right, Lil. We didn't try that hard to keep in touch with you, _I _didn't. I stopped calling and then when you never called back and hung out with us less and less, I just didn't try hard enough to stay friends with you. And I should have and I'm sorry."

         Lillian could fill the guilt welling up in her eyes now and she couldn't believe it. Why did they always have to be so nice? This would be so much easier if they weren't, because Lillian had already decided what friends she'd have and those friends wouldn't like her old friends very much. And she, she needed to be able to act like she didn't even remember the old gang and she couldn't do that when they were always acting so kind to her. She stood and looked over, gripping her cloth. "Kimmi, Tommy was right. Way too much has changed already, _I've _changed too much. So for me to stand here and act like everything is the same isn't fair, to you guys. So I'm sorry, ok, Kimmi. I really am, but we... I just grew apart and it's too late," she replied.

         Kimmi's face looked shocked and fallen, when the café manager came walking in through the back door. "Lillian! What's taking you so long?" she called, motioning to a gentleman waiting impatiently by the counter. 

         "Sorry, be right there!" Lillian responded and then glanced back at Kimmi with an apologetic stare before walking towards the counter. 

--

         The hallway was littered with kids but they all seemed to part when Angelica strode by. They better, at least they knew their place. She was dressed in a dark blue shirt and jeans with silver hoop earrings, her blonde hair down and straight. She had to smile to herself, life was great. People were in awe and fear of her and she ruled this school. What could be better?

         "Angelica! Angelica, slow down!" she heard a familiar voice call and her smile melted from her face. She whirled around to see Chuckie weaving through people after her, grinning. Lowering her gaze, she stormed towards him and grabbed his arm, pulling him under the staircase where no one usually passed by.

         Now in the dim shade, she hushed, "Shhh, not so loud."

         Chuckie looked a little hurt when he replied, "What? Are you afraid someone will hear or something?" He was dressed in a yellow and brown tee shirt and jeans. Angelica noted he didn't look too bad today, actually pretty... ok.

         Angelica softened slightly and rolled her eyes. "Don't be stupid. Now get on with it already, Finister, I don't have all day," she sighed.

         Chuckie retorted, "Forgot. People to insult, cheers to create." Her edged stare however stopped any further sarcasm and he went on to say, "Ok, well, guess what I got you?"

         She made a slight irritated sound and responded, "Oh I don't know. A gun to shoot myself with?"

         His grin faltered for a second as he shot jokingly, "Don't tempt me." Then there was that goofy smile again as he added excitedly, "A ticket to see Boxcar Racer!"

         Why? Why did this boy think they could be friends, or more then friends? Why didn't he realize there was just no possible way? Why couldn't he figure out that kiss a few days ago, it was just... a slip up, a slight stagger in her act as perfect social butterfly? Why... Why did she have to get a strange breathless warm feeling whenever he was around, whenever they would trade their insults? "You're kidding," she said flatly.

         The grin was still there as he replied, nervously, "Try not to get too excited. Come on, Angelica, it's only one of the best bands ever. I thought you'd wanna go. I mean, with me."

         Angelica flinched slightly at his words, at how much he meant them. She reached over to touch his arm. "Chuckie, I just think -" she began to say.

         "Angelica, there you are! We've been looking all over for you," they heard a girl's voice and their eyes both switched over to a few girls walking over towards them, members of the cheerleading squad. The one who had spoken, Niki, noticed Chuckie for the first time and gawked, "Oh. My God. What are you doing with this social reject?"

         Chuckie glared at Niki before Angelica yanked away her arm quickly. "Ew! I so would never go on a date with you, like ever, Finister! Not even if you were the last boy on the planet! You're such a freckled face... loser!" she blurted to cover up. 

          Chuckie's dark eyes racked over Angelica painfully, she could see the hurt shining in them. He could have been sarcastic or witty back; he could have even been the _new _Chuckie and said something cruel. But he just couldn't find it in him and he responded softly, "I thought you changed, Angelica."

         Her vivid ocean eyes met his and she spat, "Why would I! I like my life, thank you. After all, who would rule this school and you geeks beside me?" But she knew it all sounded forced and her stare was saying something else. It was saying, _"I want to."_

         Niki and the others were giggling. "Come on, Angelica. He looks like he's about to cry," she said with a smile.

         Angelica let her gaze linger on him for a moment longer before she turned and followed her friends towards the bright hallway. "Whatever. That'll teach him to try and talk to superior life forms. Like I would actually date him, puh-leaze! Barf to the extreme," he could hear her say as they drifted away. He stared ahead and wondered why he had to be such a fool all the time. Why did he even like her? Because from now on, it would be different, he'd have to make himself not care. Because she'd never change and he needed to stop thinking she ever would.

--

         Phil stood in the lunch line, sandwiched in by some kid and Kimmi to his left. He leaned over to hand his lunch tray to a woman with peppered hair and a mustache. "Kathy, you're looking hotter then ever today. Your mole is working for you, like Cindy Crawford," he said with a wink referring to her hairy mole on her cheek and every student within earshot cracked with laughter. The lunch lady just glared in response, use to Phil already, and plopped a burger down on his tray before shoving it back at him.

         Kimmi tried to hide her giggles but smiled and retorted, "You better watch out. I bet that burger has a nice helping of spit to go along with it." She was dressed in faded jeans with rips at the knees and a white long sleeved top, her hair down. 

         Phil crinkled his nose and opened up the bun to peer at his food. "Jeesh, try to brighten a few ladies' lives and suddenly you're a creep," he sighed. He was wearing a gray long sleeved shirt with a red stripe and jeans.

         Kimmi smirked and responded matter-of-factly, "I never said you were a creep, just a complete jerk wad."

         They walked over to the condiments table and Phil responded with a grin, "You're a true friend, Kimmi Finister." Then looking down, he started nonchalantly, "Uh about this morning, Kimmi. I was going to tell you, honest. I mean we're best friends so of course I would, right."

         She tried not to think about how the 'best friend' word stung. Instead she focused her eyes at the ketchup and forced with fake happiness, "You going out with her again?"

         Phil glanced over at her, suddenly he wasn't sure if he wanted her to be ok with this or tell him she wasn't. He shrugged then and said, "I told her I would, yea. I don't know, she's ok. I mean she's smart and cute but she's not really _really _funny. You know."

         There he went again, trying to make her feel better, like this girl wasn't as great as he'd told Chuckie she was and Kimmi just wanted to scream. She didn't need this, she didn't need him to feel sorry for her. She turned to meet his eyes and snap coldly, "I get it, Phil. Just, stop. Ok. You don't need to try to make me feel better or explain anything. Because I get it, and I'm ok with it. You just didn't want to be with me because you couldn't see me that way. That's fine." 

         Phil searched her face with surprise and replied, "No. I mean, yea. Right? Isn't that what we said?"

         Kimmi could feel the hurt and anger building up in her eyes and started to walk away, towards their table. Phil followed and she said without looking at him, "Yea, it is. Because I'm just a friend. Don't worry, Phil. I'm just regular, sporty, funny Kimmi. I'm not surprised ok, it's just like Izaac said. It's ok."

         The boy's voice rose with protective temper as he countered, "No, it's not ok! Izaac's an idiot and a punk and..." Breathing in, he stopped and grabbed the petite girl's arm gently, making her stop. She turned to face him, her eyes haunting with hard sadness, and he questioned, "Look, Kimmi. Are you mad or something? Because if you are I don't have to go out with Abbey -"

         She blinked at her feelings to press them down and reply in a strained voice, "No. I'm fine, Phil. Go out with, Abbey. I don't care."

         He stared at her, not knowing what to say, his hand still holding onto her. "Hey, Philly! Over here, saved you a seat!" they heard a girl's voice and Phil let go of Kimmi and turned. A slender girl with medium length brown hair and tan skin was smiling at him and gesturing to a seat by her. 

         "In a minute, Abs," Phil called in response. Then he looked back towards Kimmi and his eyes were filled with concern. "I don't have to sit with her," he said.

         Kimmi tried to close her eyes against a hot swell of dampness and she responded quietly, "Yes you do. You're dating her and you're sitting with her and I don't care." Then she walked away from him, towards their table with Chuckie and Tommy and didn't look back. If she would have, she would have seen Phil watching after her with confusion and regret.

--

         Tommy and Phil hung out at the DeVille's house after their practices. Well really just sat around, being bored and saying close to nothing, distracted by their own thoughts. Tommy was sitting on Phil's computer desk chair, twirling around slowly in it. He was dressed in darker jeans and a black long sleeved shirt. "What do you think they're doing in there?" he questioned, which if Phil wasn't wondering the same exact thing he probably would have noticed how much Tommy cared. 

         Phil lay on his plaid bed, leaning back against a pillow and tossing up a mini basketball. "Not studying that's for sure. Probably making out like horny rabbits. On the blanket my nana gave us. O God, I think I'm going to be sick. Don't say stuff like that," he cringed, referring to Brett and Lillian who had headed to her room hand in hand when they came back from their practices as well.

         Tommy looked equally as concerned but he continued circling, noting for the record, "I wasn't, you were."

         Phil rolled his eyes and scoffed, "Well whatever. Really, _Brett_? He's all hair, no brains, you know."

         Tommy nodded in agreement and commented, "And, I mean, what kind of name is Brett? _Brett_?" Ok that was stupid, but so what? He could make fun of this guy's name because he was a loser and just not good enough for Lillian. And a part of him told him he was jealous but he tried to ignore it.

         Phil shook his head of light brown hair and said, "Ok, we need to stop talking about whether or not my sister may or may not be going all the way in the other room."

         Tommy raised his eyebrows and exclaimed, "She's not! Phil, they're not even steady." He wanted to believe it too because anything else made him feel sick to his stomach.

         Phil shrugged his shoulders and retorted, "Hey, for all I know, my sister could be a slut." Tommy paused from swiveling around in the chair to glare at Phil. His friend just nodded and sighed, "Ok, dropping it."

         Tommy rested his feet on the table and raised his hands for Phil to toss him the ball. "Hey, nice way to ditch us during lunch, dude," he stated abruptly.

         Phil groaned and leaned his head back to stare up at his ceiling. "That's not my fault, its Abbey's. Great girl, hot as anything, sweet. But she's so clingy and likes to use stupid nicknames like "sugar lips" and "Philly". It's embarrassing to me as a man, Tommy. Why... Was, uh, Kimmi mad about that?" he said and tried to sound casual.

         Tommy just shrugged and threw the ball back at him. "A little. But we all were. That was pretty cold, ditching us for a girl," he responded. He could have suggested next time Phil invite Abbey to sit with the group but well, he really didn't want her sitting with them. Because he knew Abbey and while she was nice, she was also annoying and she was so smart in the condescending way that she always had to make you feel stupid when you talked to her. 

         "I know, won't happen again," Phil replied. Still looking up, he questioned, "So she... Really wasn't mad huh?"

         Tommy cocked an eyebrow and replied knowingly, "Ok, what's going on with you two? Did something happen I don't know about?"

         Phil looked back at Tommy and chucked the ball at him for him to catch. "What! No. Nothing at all, I was just wondering because she was acting really weird about the whole thing," he hurriedly explained.

         Tommy nodded and then remembered something. He slid a hand in his pocket and stood up. "O yea, she gave me this to give to you. Said its an extra one encase you wanna bring along "Abs". Her words, not mine," he said and handed Phil a ticket to the concert.

         Phil stared down at the paper and wondered aloud, "Really? You think I should?"

         Tommy shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets. "Dunno, its up to you. If I had a girlfriend I'd invite her," he responded.

         Phil put the ticket on his nightstand and responded, "Right. I dunno. Abbey probably doesn't even know who they are; she's into Britney Spears. Yup, I know, like I said, its embarrassing to my manhood." He couldn't say the real reason, that maybe he was worried Kimmi was putting on an act and this really was affecting her... And why did he feel like he was hoping it was? 

         Tommy laughed, "Yea, I wouldn't spread that around if I were you." Then he added, "You think I could get a drink or something?"

         Phil nodded and sat up, his hair in messy disarray. "Yea, me too. I'm feeling parched myself," he replied.

         Tommy followed Phil out the bedroom door, arcing an eyebrow. ""Parched"? Ok, since when do you use big words, Phil?" he joked.

         "Hey, it's a word in the English language I just decided I needed to use more often ok," Phil remarked before sighing and admitting, "Abbey's so smart I feel stupid in comparison so I've been trying to bulk up, you know, play smart."

         Tommy winced and said wisely, "Uh oh, already changing for her. That doesn't look good, dude." 

         Phil shook his head and exclaimed, "Not change! Just... broaden my horizons."

         They walked into the kitchen, hearing a set of laughter echoing along the peach tiles. Lillian was leaning against the sink, a glass of water in her hand. She was wearing a black tank top and dark fitted jeans with a little silver heart necklace, her hair all down. Brett was standing in front of her and he looked over towards Phil with a nod and an expression that said he could understand why Phil might hate him, like he would towards any guy who was dating his sister.  

         The smile slipped from her lips as Lillian greeted, "Hey, loser." 

         Phil just nodded in their direction and continued towards the cupboards. "Ladies," he responded.

         Brett raised his eyebrows and exchanged a faint smile with Lillian. "I think I'm gonna head back to your room," the blonde boy said and left the kitchen.

         Lillian remarked after him, mainly for her brother to hear, "I think you should. We just got a downpour of jerk in here."

         Phil just tilted his head back to call after Brett, "Don't forget to bag it!"

         Lillian's lips parted and she wrinkled her nose at him. "Gross, Phil. Do you always have to be so disgusting? O wait, forgot its your one and only talent," she retorted.

         Phil placed two glasses on the counter and then started filling them up with tap water. "Do you always have to be whoring it up? And in our own house, ma would be proud," he shot back. 

         Lillian didn't think she should tell her brother there was none of that going on in her room, that they were really only hanging out and a little kissing here and there but that was it. It felt better to make him feel sick with doubt about it. "Well someone has to. I mean, you're still interested in the opposite sex right, Phillip? Haven't switched teams yet?" she questioned with a laugh over the lip of her glass.

         Phil shut off the faucet and glared at her. "Hilarious. I'll have you know, I have a girlfriend," he replied.

         Lillian raised her eyebrows and asked with a smile, "Really? Who's the lucky fella? Will I get to meet him?" Tommy had to stifle his laughter at this, Lillian and Phil were always so funny together, even now when they acted like they really did hate each other but of course they didn't.

         Phil glowered and deadpanned, "Har har har. Stick to waving around pom poms and spelling, ok." He handed Tommy his water and then leaned against the counter near his sister. 

         She smiled at him smugly and blinked her eyelashes. "I got an A on my English paper. Get ready for mom and dad to be completely gushing over me," she said.

         Phil just shrugged unimpressed and replied, "Yea well, I got a C on my history test so at least that's not failing."  
  


         Lillian elbowed him for his bad grade and then added, "I wouldn't tell them about that. Then again, you are close to retarded so they might let it slide." Tommy really did laugh at that and Phil shot him a scowl.

         "Yea, well we all know the only way you get the grades you do is because you're going for "extra credit" with half your teachers," Phil retorted.

         The girl gasped in disgust and shouted, "Phil, sick!" She raised her glass and threw the remaining water at him; it splashed in a wet patch on his shirt, whatever missed spilling on the floor. She knew how meticulous he was about his clothing, he took as long as she did to get ready in the morning usually.

         Phil looked down and his mouth fell open. "Hey! I'm soaked!" he exclaimed huffily. 

         Lillian and Tommy were both fighting laughter as Lillian responded, "That was sorta the idea, genius. Help me clean this up now." She pointed to the puddle of water that had landed on the tiles.

         Phil pulled his damp shirt away from his skin and snorted, "Yea right, dearest sister of mine. You're on your own, I'm gonna go change." Then he stomped off to his room and the two burst into loud laughter after him. Lillian clutched her slender middle and held onto the counter. "Hey, I hear you guys!" Phil shouted muffled and they quieted immediately, stifling their chuckles.

         Lillian then grabbed a few sheets of paper towels and kneeled down to start sopping up the mess. Tommy went over to place his glass in the sink and offered, "Here, I'll help." He grabbed some paper towel and kneeled down too.

         Lillian looked down at the floor, smiling slightly. "No, Tommy. That's fine, really. It's not your fault, it's my idiot brothers. Seriously, you don't have to," she replied. 

         Tommy just grinned back and shrugged. "It's ok. I'm use to covering for him anyway," he said and Lillian laughed softly.

         As they continued to soak up the water, Lillian stopped, resting on her hands and staring down at the tiles. "Tommy, really... Why?" she suddenly questioned.

         Tommy stopped too and looked over at her. "Why what?" he asked curiously.

         She still couldn't meet his eyes as she went on, "Why are you so nice all the time? You're so nice. And I... I hate being mean to you."

         Tommy's eyes flickered over the kitchen when he replied, a little confused and harsh, "Then don't."

         Lillian sat back now on her knees, staring at him, her moss eyes matching his and looking so guilty. Tommy sat up too on his knees, looking straight across at her. "So what then, just be nice to you in private and ignore you in public? But if I'm friends with you and the others in school, Angelica and her friends will avoid me. I just want to keep my old friends and my new friends, I just wish I could. I just wish I didn't feel torn in two all the time, like I'm not even sure who I am. I just..." she trailed off and her eyes reflected wet in the light scattering from the window. She bit her bottom lip before continuing, "All I ever am is a witch to you now, in school and around everyone. And you're still always there for me. First in Phil's room and at your house and now... You're always there, and I don't deserve having such a nice guy like you in my life."

         Tommy would have agreed with her, would have told her everything she said was true and she treated them, him, like they didn't even matter anymore. Only he couldn't stop himself from feeling like he just wanted her to feel ok and not have all this guilt and sadness welling up in her. He replied, "Lillian. It's ok, really. I know, I know none of this is your fault, ok." A tear made a track down the map of her skin and reflexively he reached out and pulled her close to him. Both kneeling, his arms around her, she leaned her cheek into his shoulder. "It's my fault too. I should have tried talking to you or, I don't know, noticed," he went on.

          She shook her head slightly against him and squeezed her eyes shut, feeling the tears burn holes into her eyelids. "No, its not. Its all my fault and I'm sorry, Tommy. I really am," she responded softly.

         Tommy held her and she fit so perfectly near him, her hands resting at his sides and his around her waist. He breathed in her vanilla and flowers perfume, feeling each other's warmth. He leaned his cheek against her head, her hair stirring his skin, and tried not to let this feel too good or he'd never want to let go. They sat like this for long moments before finally Tommy said into her hair to fill the silence, "Kimmi told me, about how she got that ticket for you. I think you should go." (Even if now that ticket is necessarily meant for Abbey, Phil already said he probably wouldn't bring her. Then there's the one for Angelica who we now know isn't going. Just wanted to clear that up!) 

         Lillian held onto him and could feel the cooling spot of tears in his shirt. "You do?" she questioned quietly.

         Tommy nodded near her and replied, "Yea. Just... Just think about it ok."

         Lillian didn't want to let go; there was something about this that just felt _right. _She clutched onto his sides and pressed her cheek into the side of his head. "Ok," she said into his ear.

         "Lillian? Babe, something wrong?"

         Brett's voice broke through the comforting quiet and Lillian pulled away from Tommy slowly, looking down. "No," she called towards the hallway. She grabbed at a paper towel on the floor to continue mopping up the water.

         Tommy looked down and started to help clean as well. "I'll finish up," he said.

         Lillian gazed over at him and looked hesitant. She smiled slightly and responded, "Really? Ok, thanks, Tommy." Then she wiped at her cheeks with a hand and got up. He heard her walk down the hall and her muffled voice as she started to speak with Brett and the door closed behind her. And as he kneeled there, cleaning up the mess alone, he distantly knew that nice guys finished last, but with her, he couldn't help it.

--

**Author's Notes: **First off, I have nothing against Britney Spears at all! I actually like her and have been to her concert. That said, come on, everyone jokes about artists, so yea, I'm sure Phil even likes her, he's just being sarcastic. Also, if you remember, chapter two I said Phil had space ship blankets. Now either his mother changes them from summer to winter like my mom does or he got embarrassed by having them. Lol. Really, I just wanted to use that "**Everwood**" picture in the wallpaper. 

Ahh, the old cliché of nice guys finish last! But seriously, that just fit perfectly with the story because Tommy is always there for Lillian, he even invited her to the concert _again_ after she ignored him with her friends the first time. This could be a little bit of a continuous theme. Just expect not to like Lillian so much next chapter. =/ Of course, I'd never make Lillian a real jerk because she's one of my favorite characters! And who exactly is this Abbey girl except a huge roadblock in the way of P/K? Hee. I know she came out of nowhere, that was sorta the point, but she _doesn't_ play a big part in this story and she's not in this for long. (Big hint, haha) Kimmi seems like the only one getting the short end of the stick but believe me, its not like other boys don't like her. Its just that maybe she won't give them the chance for unknown reasons... Angelica is right back in her old form, maybe because she knew Chuckie was getting through that hard shell of hers. Chuckie's finally given up, but we've already seen he's starting to change from awkward to more mature, it's only a matter of time before Angelica and other girls realizes how cool he is right? 

Ok well I made a full plot list of what's going to happen in this story and yea, there will be a lot. Expect parties and twists and ice-skating and more angsty love!  


	7. Chapter Seven: Standing In The Crowd

**Disclaimer: **This chapter has the B word in it as well as a small reference to people doing sexual and illegal activities at a concert. If this might upset you, please do not read. (Lol, I just feel like I have to warn people! I don't want to be the reason some poor child is corrupted ok!) Please let me know if you think I should raise the rating or not if you have an issue with it ok and I'll have no problem doing so. I still think its mild enough for PG-13 but this could change, not sure. Just let me know and I'll change the rating in a heartbeat!

**Splintered Reflections**

By Heather [TinySweetHeart]

--

Chapter Seven: Standing In The Crowd 

I am lost in the crowd  
I'm standing in line  
I'm feeling so down  
And I am full of doubt  
She's not the one take notice  
Hear me out  
And I want her, need her

-- "And I" -- Boxcar Racer --

--

         Tommy walked down the Freshman hallway; it was practically empty except for a few kids hurrying to shove stuff in their lockers. He really needed to start getting to school earlier, especially since it was still pretty much the beginning of the year. He was dressed in jeans and a dark brown tee shirt, his hair damp still from jumping in the shower not too long ago. 

         Up ahead he saw Lillian at her locker, she must have been late too. The idea that maybe she had been busy with Brett in the parking lot before school didn't settle well in his stomach. She was wearing a pale blue long sleeved shirt and jeans, her hair wavy and down. He wasn't sure where exactly they were at after what had happened a few days ago after school and they really hadn't talked since. Lillian heard him walking and turned. She smiled when she realized it was him and closed her locker. "Hey, Tommy. Can I talk to you for a minute?" she called, approaching him.

         Tommy just nodded and raised his backpack on his shoulder. "Uh sure. What about?" he questioned.

         She glanced down at the ground before meeting his eyes. "About Tuesday, after school. That's not like me and I'm sorry," she admitted.

         Tommy really didn't want her to say that, because she'd told him stuff and trusted him and they'd hugged and it had felt... like he was seeing the real her for awhile, not the act she put on in school. "It's ok, really," he replied and shrugged.

         Lillian shook her head and went on, "No, it wasn't ok. I don't know what the matter was with me; it must be from the new school year or something. Still I unloaded all my crap on you and that wasn't right."

         Tommy tried to act like he didn't care when he responded casually, "It wasn't that big of a deal." 

         The girl smiled, relieved. "Ok, great. Cool. How's Chemistry going?" she asked. 

         Tommy raised his shoulders again and replied, "Uh fine, I guess. I'm passing."

         She nodded and said sincerely, "That's great, Tommy."  
  


         Tommy chuckled slightly and added, "You know, Phil's still complaining about how his shirt is ruined now. Like he'll never be able to wear it again." He remembered how Phil was whining to him online about Lillian dumping water on him like his life was over. Seriously Phil could be dramatic when he wanted to be.

         Lillian broke with laughter and exclaimed, "Clothes are washed in water! God, I feel like I have a sister, not a brother. We sure he hasn't switched teams yet?"

         The boy raised his eyebrows and smiled. "I dunno. You know how those basketball guys are, all into their clothes. Those shorts they wear are a little _too_ short, if you know what I mean," he joked.

         The girl was shaking her head and giggling when they heard the warning bell go off through the classrooms. "See you around, Tommy," Lillian said as she turned around, starting down the hall to her homeroom. 

         Tommy thought about something else suddenly and called after her, "You're going to the concert right?"

         Lillian glanced back over her shoulder distractedly and responded, "Sure." Then she continued down the hall and into her homeroom door. 

         Tommy decided he didn't have time to go to his locker; he'd be better off just going to it before the first class of the day. His homeroom was farther down then Lillian's and he started running to it. He slipped into the door just as the bell went off to signify homeroom's start and the cranky old woman, Ms. McDouglas, glared at him over her glasses. Tommy quickly sat in the only available seat and pretended to listen to the roll call. 

         He was doing just that when he heard a soft whisper, "Psss." He looked around slowly, after all it probably wasn't for him, he didn't know many people in this homeroom since they were all upperclassmen. "Psss, idiot!" the voice hissed.

         Now Tommy definitely knew who that was and he moved slightly around in his chair to stare at his cousin, sitting two seats back in the row over. Still she never talked to him in school, which he was thankful of, so he asked, "What? You talking to me?"

         Angelica's blue eyes swelled and searched around to see if anyone was looking at them, thankfully they were all too busy acting like they were paying attention or sleeping. "No, I believe I was _whispering_ to you so keep it down, big mouth," she huffed in a low voice. She was dressed in a pink off-the-shoulder top and jeans, her hair tied back in a low ponytail. 

         Tommy rolled his eyes and commented coldly, "Can we make this quick? I'm allergic to bitches." Tommy was one person Angelica couldn't step on and that really annoyed her to no end. Him and well... Chuckie now too. God, that was way too many people! If she didn't watch out soon she'd have no power over these lower students.

         She glared at him sharply and snapped quietly, "You are so lucky we're related or I could kill you for that."

         The boy just sighed and replied wearily, "Sure. So what is it, Angelica?"

         She lowered her head down farther and scanned around nervously. Then she blurted in a rushed whisper, "IjustwantedtoknowhowisChuckie?"

         Tommy scrunched his brow and asked, "What?"

         Angelica lowered her head even farther so that her cheek was almost pressed to the desk. "I said, how is Chuckie?" she replied slower this time, her face flushing red.

         Tommy looked a little shocked and he replied in confusion, "He's fine, I guess. Why do you care?"

         The girl's tidal eyes were wide now when she exclaimed, "I don't!" Whoops, a little too loud. Thankfully, everyone was too dazed from a lack of sleep to pay attention to her and she went on in a hushed tone, "I don't. I was just wondering for reasons that are not any of your business and now I will turn around and let you vanish back to your life among the geeks and losers. Continue on, twerp."

         Tommy just cocked an eyebrow and stared back at their teacher as she read off people on her list. Angelica twirled around, swinging her pink pen in the air to check off some girl's magazine quiz and acted like nothing had even happened. If Tommy didn't know any better he'd think Angelica, the Ice Princess, actually _cared_ about Chuckie Finister. Of course, if he didn't know any better.

--

         Angelica despised Spanish class. It was hard, like when would you ever need to know how to speak Spanish anyway unless you were in a foreign country and most people knew English nowadays. Still that wasn't the reason. It was filled with underclassman, Sophomores, because Angelica had made the mistake of taking French the first year of school and then switching to Spanish later on. So now she was stuck with all these immature tacky losers who threw wades of paper at each other and wrote their names on the board when no one was looking. Still, not the reason. There were only two words to explain why she hated this class – Chuckie Finister. This was the only class they had together; thankfully he sat up one seat from her in a row over so she didn't really have to interact with him. But now, he didn't even look at her or try to steal glances, he didn't care about her. And she didn't know why that bothered her so much.

           Their teacher, Senora Velasquez, stood lecturing by the chalkboard. "Ok, can someone tell me how to say milk in Spanish? Por favor? Fine, since I can tell you all didn't do your homework I'll just pick on someone. Angelica, please answer the question," she said.

         Angelica snapped her head up from her own thoughts, glancing around uncertain. Of course she hadn't done the homework, as if she had time between cheerleading and hanging out with friends. "Uh right. The homework, yea I did that. Milk is... vaca," she covered weakly. She was wearing a plaid button up dress that reached above her knees and pink platform sandals, her hair styled into waves.

         The teacher winced and shook her head. "No, Angelica. Vaca is the word for cow, same vicinity I guess. Care to tell me the real answer now?" Senora Velasquez corrected. 

         Angelica nodded and hurriedly explained, "O yea I knew that. I was just going to lead up to it yea know. Like vaca is cow and a cow totally like makes milk. And the word for milk is..."

         "Leche," Chuckie suddenly finished for her, still staring ahead. He was wearing khaki pants and a white tee shirt, his hair as wild as ever.

         Senora Velasquez grinned and exclaimed, "Muy bien, Senor Chuckie! I see someone pays attention when I speak." The teacher went on to cover vocabulary for a test and drone on.

         Angelica glared at the back of Chuckie's head and remarked under her breath, "I didn't ask for your help, Finister." Ok, so that wasn't necessary, but there was a part of her that just wanted him to notice her again, to worship her like before. 

         Chuckie sighed and didn't even turn to look at her. "I wasn't helping you, Angelica. I just didn't want to have to wait here while you sounded like an idiot for a half hour," he whispered in return. A few students around them laughed and this only made the girl more furious. 

         The blonde scoffed a little louder, "You know what, Finister, I'd be a super brain too if I didn't have a life."

         The teacher noticed the side conversation then and faced Angelica. "Angelica! Really, do I need to see you after school?" she said sternly.

         Angelica shook her head, looking down. She was a pro at getting out of trouble, she knew how to wrap people around her finger and teachers were no different. "No, Senora Velasquez," she responded obediently.

         Senora Velasquez gestured to the students as she replied, "Well then since it was so important, please share what you were talking about with the class."

         "It was nothing..." Angelica started to say.

         Chuckie stated loudly, for everyone to hear, "O come on, Angelica, everyone deserves to know. See, she was just telling me how she stuffs her bra and gets this weird foot thing, like a fungus. Right, Angelica?" The entire class filled with laughter and Angelica could feel her face flushing. 

         The girl arced an eyebrow and snapped evenly, "You're life is over, Finister."

         The teacher interjected, "Do I have to send you both to the principal's?"

         Both students looked down and responded in unison, "No."

         Senora Velasquez went on with the class lecture and everyone pretended to listen. Angelica strummed her nails against the desk and kept shooting glares in Chuckie's direction. So this was how they were going to play it huh? He wanted to try and embarrass her in front of people? Well two could so play this game.

--

         They were at their usually hang out, the arcade in the mall. It was a rainy Saturday afternoon, a week away from the concert. Kids played around them on loud, glowing games. Kimmi stood by Phil, sipping at a big Slushie, dressed in faded jeans and a dark blue tee shirt, her hair pulled back in a messy bun. "What game you wanna play now?" she questioned from around her straw.

         Phil was wearing a red tee shirt and jeans with a backwards baseball cap. "I like that one where I get to be a big fat crime boss and shoot people. Since that is my aspiration in life, you know," he replied matter-of-factly.

         Kimmi laughed and shot him a flat look. "Right. Phillip DeVille the godfather. It doesn't have a ring, Phil," she remarked.

         The boy squinted his eyes and tried to impersonate a mob guy, "What's that you say? You dare to disrespect me in my own place of rest? No one goes against the family. Tony, make her sleep with the fishes."

         Kimmi rolled her eyes and replied, "Ok, you've been watching "**The Sopranos**" too much."

         Phil laughed and took the drink from her hand, taking a sip. He did that often so she was use to it by now, still she gave him an annoyed glare and crossed her arms. He pretended not to notice as he said, "Hey, I heard about Izaac."

         Kimmi looked a little alarmed as she quickly spluttered, "What about him?"

         Phil pretended to fiddle with the straw as he replied, "He asked you out. I heard all about it, Kimmi."

         The girl sighed and exclaimed, "God, I tried to keep that to myself, Phil, it's not something I want the whole school to know! I mean, Izaac, gross. He's such a jerk and a chauvinist pig." It was so strange; one minute Izaac was telling her off and the next he wanted to date her. Obviously he still thought he was in the third grade and the only way to get a girl's attention was to be mean to them.

         Phil seemed relieved for some reason, he tried to tell himself it wasn't because Kimmi had turned down Izaac. "But jerk and chauvinist pig are your pet names for _me._ And here I thought I was special, I bet you call all the boys that," he teased with a smile. 

         Kimmi laughed and shook her head. "Not all. Just you and Izaac are the special few," she replied mock sweetly. Then she glanced downward, remembering the obligatory best friend small talk you had to make. She should be able to talk about Abbey right? If it really doesn't affect her she should be fine with it. "So, uh how are things going with Abbey?" she questioned softly.

         Phil looked down as well and said, "Pretty ok. She seems really into me and I like her a lot, sometimes I feel like she's too good for me you know."

         Kimmi forced on a smile and cracked, "Wow. That's big coming from your over-sized ego."

         Phil chuckled and responded, "I know. So, I was thinking of asking her to go steady at the concert. I'm pretty sure she'll say yes, I mean she's been hinting at it like crazy all week and we've been going out for a while. It's just one little word anyway, its not like I'm dating anyone else or any -"

         Kimmi had stopped listening when he said he was bringing her to the concert. She suddenly interrupted, "You're inviting her to the concert?"

         Phil paused and nodded. "Yea. Well, I already did. She tried to act like she knew who they are when I know she doesn't, it was cute," he informed.

         There was this underlying sinking feeling, like she knew everything she was trying to tell herself was untrue. "I thought you said you weren't inviting her," she said, eyes catching a slight glint.

         The boy looked a little puzzled as he raised an eyebrow and explained, "Yea but that was before, you know, I really started liking her. I thought you guys wouldn't mind, I mean, you said you wouldn't."

         Kimmi felt a little breathless but she responded flatly, "And we don't, of course not. **Mob Boss: Rags To Riches**."

         Phil seemed really confused now as he knitted his brow. "What?" he asked.

         Kimmi pointed past him, to an arcade game. "The game you wanted to play, **Mob Boss: Rags To Riches**," she went on blankly.

         Phil nodded slowly and smiled, turning around. "Oh right. Time to take out the trash, my friends. Put some squealers in cement shoes, you know what I mean?" he joked as he walked away. Kimmi stayed in place for a moment, reeling with too many thoughts. Then she blinked away the sheen and followed him, willing herself not to care.

--

         Chuckie drove down the road smudged with orange streetlamps, grinning to himself. He was dressed in a zip up blue hoodie and jeans. "I am so excited! Seriously, I brought my inhaler if I end up getting an asthma attack," he gushed. 

         Tommy sat in the back, wearing jeans and a gray sweatshirt. "Yea, me too. This is my first concert," he admitted.

         Kimmi was by Chuckie in the passenger seat, tapping along to the radio music. "Where's Phil?" she questioned. Kimmi was dressed in black pants and a black zip up sweatshirt, her dark hair down.

         Her brother kept his eyes ahead as he replied, "He called and said Abbey's dad's gonna give them a ride. Its kinda a good thing, you guys don't have to be packed in the back."

         Kimmi nodded slightly and looked out the side window, at the fuzzy outline of an ashen moon. Then she smiled hollowly and remarked, "I'm so excited too. I think I wanna try that crowd surfing thing."

         Chuckie glanced over at her with an arched eyebrow. He responded protectively, "And have guys grope you? Yea, that's not happening, little sis. You're staying by my side at all times. I mean, who knows what people do at these things! There could be like... drug use or sex going on or..." At the idea of all those corrupting activities his sister would be exposed to, he started to wheeze for air. 

         Tommy leaned over to pat Chuckie on the shoulder. "Breathe, buddy," he said.

          Chuckie pulled out his inhaler from his pocket and took a deep breath in. He could be known to overreact about all the "dangerous" of parties and other things. That's probably why he didn't go to many, that or he just wasn't invited. Usually the latter.

         Kimmi tilted her head towards her brother and shot sarcastically, "Hey, I have an idea. Why don't I wear a leash and you can keep track of me at all hours of the day?"    
   
         Chuckie nodded and responded, "I like the way you think." To this Kimmi merely rolled her eyes and turned to the window again.

         There was a pause of silence in the car before Tommy reminded, "Don't forget to pick up Lil."

         Chuckie stared ahead but he knew what would happen, what always happened. Lillian would do something to hurt Tommy. Girls like her only cared about one thing, themselves, Chuckie had found that out the hard way and he'd never forget it. "Right," he replied unreadably.

         Finally they got to the DeVille residence and Chuckie parked in the driveway. Tommy left the car and walked up to the dark porch, smiling slightly. Ok, so he was happy, what was so wrong with that? He was going to an awesome concert... And yea, Lillian was going too. He knocked on the door before shoving his hands in his pockets. He waited for a moment and there were muffled voices before the door swung open, parting cream light.

         Lillian stood in the door way and she looked a little surprised. She was dressed in a tan long sleeved shirt and white corduroy pants, her chestnut hair collapsing down her shoulders. "Oh..." she slipped out.

         Tommy crinkled his brow but laughed slightly. "That's a weird way to greet people. Is that cheerleader for "hello" now?" he questioned.

         Lillian's face remained grave as she replied, "I was just... I meant, hey Tommy."

         By now Tommy could tell something was wrong but he was hoping there wasn't, that she wouldn't disappoint him this last time. "So you ready to go?" he asked.

         The girl winced faintly as she began, "About that Tommy."

         Suddenly a boy's voice barged from inside, "You're missing the movie, Lillian! It's at the scariest part. O man, that girl is totally shredded!" Lillian looked downward, not wanting to meet Tommy's stare, unable to breathe.

         Tommy recognized the voice and he searched Lillian's face. "He's over," he stated.

         She nodded and replied sincerely, "Yea. I forgot about the concert. I'm sorry, Tommy."

         Tommy couldn't believe it, couldn't believe he'd set himself up for this and she really could be so selfish. He stepped back once, moonlight reflecting in his dark eyes. "Yea well, I am too," he said cold and hurt.

         Lillian took a deep breath and looked regretful. She stared at him and added, "Have a good time." Then she stepped back as well and closed the door slowly, golden light disappearing. 

         Tommy just stood for a moment, feeling like an idiot. He couldn't do this anymore, he couldn't just always be putting himself out there for Lillian and then whenever she felt like it she could turn around and act like he didn't even matter. And now he knew, the old Lillian wasn't there any longer. She was gone. Tommy turned and walked back to the car, slamming the door closed behind him.

         Chuckie turned his head slightly, questioning, "She bailed?"

          Tommy stared out the window and replied icily, "Who cares? I don't. We're gonna have a better time without her anyway." Then Chuckie put the gear in reverse and they were on their way to the concert. Except everyone in the car was trying to pretend they weren't missing someone, no matter how wrong it was in the end. 

--

**End Note: **Themes, themes, themes! Yay! ::Throws confetti: Chuckie has given up on Angelica, Tommy has given up on Lillian, and Kimmi is trying to give up on Phil. I'm not going to foreshadow the next chapter, I'm just gonna say it's the party chapter! Wooo, I love party plot chapters! P-A-R-T-Y! By the way, Lil was a major biotch! But, wait until the next chapter to judge her ok? Pretty please? Thanks. And you reviewers are all the best people in the world! I had no idea there were so many C/A lovers like myself, that was a little surprising. Ok and I will be getting this next chapter out lickity split, in a few days I swear! 


	8. Chapter Eight: No Where Out But Down

**Disclaimer: **Ok so I finally did it, its R now! I just did it to be safe, since its Lillian's first time in this chapter. Oh well, now I get to add some curse words instead of using creep and jerk all the time. Ha ha. Still, it's not that much worse then what you'd see on TV. (They had Marissa's first time on "**The O.C.**" and Ephram's on "**Everwood**".) Sorry if this ruins anyone's enjoyment but I had it written in the plot and I kinda wanted to touch on it since it is high school and while not everyone does it, I wanted to keep it pretty realistic. Plus there is drinking and again they are underage. Still, pretty realistic although I do not condone it and I definitely do not condone drinking and driving, i.e. Chuckie does not drink. And yes, just because this is R now, there is like one swear word. I am a pretty non-swearing girl so there won't be a lot, if at all! 

**Splintered Reflections**

By Heather [TinySweetHeart]

--

Chapter Eight: No Where Out But Down 

This love has taken its toll on me  
She said Goodbye too many times before  
And her heart is breaking in front of me  
I have no choice cause I won't say goodbye anymore

-- "This Love" -- Maroon 5 --

--

         Tommy and Chuckie sat in the Finister's living room, bored out of their minds. Tommy slouched into the cushions; he was dressed in a button down dark blue shirt and jeans. He looked frustrated when he exclaimed, "Come on, Chuck! Its Friday night, we have nothing to do. Let's just go to the party."

         Chuckie was wearing a dark brown tee shirt and jeans, pretending to be watching the television as he flipped the channels. "Uh hu, and watch people drink until they puke or pass out? I don't think so," he remarked.

         Tommy released a breath loudly and grumbled, "Then what else are we gonna do? Hang out here and watch TV?"

         The red haired boy shrugged, replying, "There's a really good show on the Historychannel."

         Tommy thought of something and smiled slightly, saying, "I bet Angelica will be there..."

         Chuckie's face grew grave as he retorted in a hard voice, "That's not gonna work because Angelica is the last person on earth I'd want to see. Yup, now I'm sure I don't want to go to this party."

         Tommy sighed loudly and looked up at the ceiling. Chuckie never wanted to do normal teenage activities, like go to a party; getting him there was like pulling teeth. But Tommy wasn't the type of guy to just ditch a friend. "Come on! We were invited, we should at least go," he tried again.

         Chuckie stayed staring ahead and responded, "Correction, you were invited. I wasn't invited. I'm never invited."

         The dark haired boy groaned and continued, "Does it really matter? Besides Phil and your sister are going. We can just hang with them."

         Chuckie sighed exaggeratedly before turning off the television. Looking to Tommy, he relinquished, "Fine, fine. But if one wasted football player tries to pick me up and swing me around I'm leaving."

         Tommy grinned and stood. "Alright. Let's just go already," he replied. 

         They went out to Chuckie's beat up car and drove to the place of the party. The white moon was already shivering in the sky, lighting the streets in metal. They arrived at around nine to see the place was already pretty full. Parking some ways down the road, they walked back to the house of some person whose parents were out of town for the weekend. Tommy just walked in, knowing if he knocked no one would hear, and Chuckie followed.

         The big stereo system was blaring with some hip-hop and kids flooded downstairs. In the kitchen, they could see a full keg and people surrounding it with red plastic cups. There was a type of dance floor near there were some teens were dancing, couples making out. The television was on, showing a scary movie, and people were sitting on the black leather couches.

         Tommy turned to Chuckie, shouting over all the noise, "You see Phil or Kimmi?"

         Chuckie scanned over the crowd of laughing people and shook his head. "No but they gotta be somewhere. I'll go look. If I'm not back in an hour either the wrestling team gave me a swirly in the toilet or I was killed by looking Angelica directly in the eyes," he replied. Tommy just laughed and Chuckie walked off, weaving between clusters of people.

         Tommy decided to head to the kitchen. He drank sometimes, after all he wasn't driving and he only had up to three ever. He had to admit he just did it because he thought he'd look stupid walking around empty handed. He grabbed a cup and then turned, looking around to see if there was anyone he knew. There were some guys from the football team; they were already pretty buzzed and laughing. One noticed Tommy and called to him, waving. "T dog!" the drunk guy shouted.

         Tommy laughed and waved back. He didn't feel like standing around, talking about football with them, that got boring fast. Or they would play some drinking game and he didn't feel like that either. Where were Phil and Kimmi? He was searching the people when he noticed her and he paused. Lillian was leaning against the counter, a cup in her hand. She was dressed in a brown stripped halter top and dark jeans with a thick woven chocker necklace, her caramel hair brushing her back. She was laughing with a friend and he should have turned away sooner only he couldn't. Then her hazel eyes flickered upwards and she saw him. His face flashed with a grimace and he moved past people, out of the kitchen, into a long empty hallway that led to bedrooms and a bathroom. 

         "Tommy! Tommy?" he heard Lillian call after him and he could tell there was a slur to her voice.  

         She touched his arm and he turned, his eyes hard. "What?" he questioned.

         Lillian was searching her gaze over his face when she replied, "Hold up a minute. Look, are you mad? About like last weekend?"

         Tommy gave her an impatient look and scoffed, "What do you think, Lillian? You know, Kimmi went out of her way to get you that ticket and you just turn around and ditch us at the last minute."

         She seemed a little taken aback and her eyes were glossed over with a little too much alcohol. "Well I said I'm sorry. It's not like I planned it. It's not like I meant it," she breathed. 

         The boy rolled his eyes and turned around. "Yea well you don't mean a lot of things," he retorted in a low voice.

         Lillian knitted her eyebrows together and asked, "What are you trying to say?"

         Tommy shot over his shoulder, "Figure it out." Then he walked down the hallway and disappeared into one of the rooms. Lillian licked her lips, they tasted acidic, and turned to head back to her friends, her head light and floating. She just wanted to feel numb and vague, then she wouldn't remember so much. 

--

         Chuckie had wandered into a doorway that led to the garage. It was frosty in there and kids crowded around a ping-pong table, hooting as two people played against each other. It was funny to watch very drunk people try to play ping-pong and stumble around after a ball. It made Chuckie glad he wasn't a part of this group, just an observer. Chuckie shook his head and continued searching around for his sister and Phil.         

         Suddenly he heard an all too familiar voice say close by, "God, they are just letting anyone into these things now."

         Chuckie turned to see Angelica standing alone, a drink in her hand. She must have decided to check out the rest of the house too. She was wearing a red long sleeve shirt with ties at the top and a dark brown skirt with suede knee high boots, her flaxen hair styled straight. "Wow, did it get cold in here or is it just you?" Chuckie retorted in a flat tone.

         The girl tilted her head and smirked. "I'm surprised to see you here. You do know this is a party right? It's not the Math Club meeting," she scoffed.

         Chuckie rolled his eyes and sighed, "Listen, as much as I'd like to continue this mature conversation, I have to go find Phil and my sister. So bye, have a good night, make out with a football player." Then Chuckie turned and headed for the door. 

         Angelica's ocean eyes grew wide and she stepped foreword, yanking his arm from behind. "Wait, I have to talk to you," she spluttered and dragged him past the doorway, through a part of the hall to the adjacent door. Then she pulled him into an empty room, it looked like a guest bedroom, and it was dimly lit by a table lamp. 

         Chuckie shook her grip off and exclaimed wearily, "What is it? Angelica, I don't want to do this anymore. First you're kissing me and then its like I don't even exist anymore. Well unless you want to make fun of me with your friends."

         Angelica faced him and forced on a smile, laughing. "Do you really think that kiss meant anything? You poor boy. It was just a mistake. I mean, it was a moment and I was just thankful for the ride. That's all. Really. Won't happen again," she replied.

         Chuckie was really tired of this, it was a game. He just wanted to go find Kimmi but well, there was a part of him that liked seeing Angelica. Old habits die hard, I guess. He groaned in frustration and said, "Whatever, Angelica. Tell yourself what you want, I know what I felt."

         The girl looked down, swirling around the liquid in her cup. "So, why are you here anyway? I didn't think parties were your thing," she commented.

         "They're not. Personally, I'd rather stay home then listen to a bunch of idiots play drinking games but everyone else wanted to go. So I was forced to," Chuckie informed. 

         Angelica laughed and gestured with a hand. "God, lighten up! This is fun, this is high school! FYI, they're supposed to be the best years of your life. What're you gonna remember more? This or staying home to play Scrabble?" she retorted.

          Chuckie sniffed indignantly and replied jokingly, "Hey I do have fun. I am the king of fun. They call me Mr Fun. Believe it or not, not everything fun involves getting wasted every weekend. And Scrabble is crazy fun." Angelica rolled her eyes at this and the boy went on matter-of-factly, "Anyway, all these guys are peaking now, in ten years they'll still be around here, trying to go to high school parties in their thirties." 

         Angelica's expression grew wounded and she stated in a hurt voice, "That's not me."

         Chuckie was a little surprised Angelica could even show she was hurt. He shook his head and replied softly, "I never said it was."

         Angelica nodded and twirled her cup some more, trying to act like that wasn't something she thought of often. If she'd be that girl that never felt as important as she did in high school, when she thought she owned the place. Absently she took a sip of her drink. Then she looked at Chuckie and offered, "Want some?" Chuckie just shook his head and Angelica laughed. "I forgot, just say no, right Chuckie?" she snorted. Her real plan had been to get Chuckie drunk and let him embarrass himself but that didn't seem likely to happen any longer. Besides that did seem pretty cruel, even for Angelica's taste. But he was asking for it, after what he pulled in Spanish class. Really, why couldn't she just let him go? Why was she enjoying this so much?

         Chuckie continued to shake his head as he turned away. "Alright, this is all you wanted to say huh? I'm outta here," he replied disappointed. 

         Her crimson lips turned up in a smile and she blurted, "That's so funny."

         The boy paused to look at her, his eyebrows arced. "What is?" he questioned. 

         Angelica seemed pleased with herself as she went on, "You, walking out on me."

         Chuckie was still puzzled as he replied coldly, "I don't see the hilarity."

         She raised her hands and informed smugly, "O come on! You like me, Chuckie. I leaned over and you just let me kiss you without a second thought. So however big you wanna talk right now, if I made a move on you, you'd crack in a minute."

         Chuckie scowled and retorted in disbelief, "Right. You think you're just the hottest girl on earth don't you?"

         Angelica propped a hand on her hip. "Pretty much," she said matter-of-factly.

         He replied a little louder in frustration, "Well, you wanna know something? I do like you and it has nothing to do with how you look." And that was defiantly not how he'd imagined telling Angelica he liked her but what did it matter now? Now that he'd realized liking her was stupid and not worth it. 

         Angelica's face flickered with doubt and she cried, "O my God! Right! You're different from every other guy at this party! What else could it possibly be then?"

         Chuckie snapped, "Well its not your personality, I'll tell you that much. Because your personality sucks. I'm not going to even tell you, you wouldn't understand."

         The girl narrowed her teal eyes and challenged, "Try me."

         Chuckie stared at her for a moment before looking away; he couldn't meet her gaze when he said this. "Ok, fine. We were all little still. We were at Tommy's house, hanging out. It was Mother's Day and everyone had cards they'd made their mom and everything. I didn't because it was just me and my dad then. You were leaving and you were putting your pink jacket on and you pulled this thing from the pocket and you gave it to me. Then you left because you didn't want me reading it in front of you. It was a card, it said 'I hope you don't feel sad.' And I was shocked because you were always so mean to me," he finally admitted and then glanced up.

         Angelica swallowed air, her thoughts spinning. She could feel the razor pricks of tears forming and she took a minute to reply as even as she could, "I forgot about that." God, that was so long ago. He remembered?

         Chuckie went on, sounding defeated, "From then on I thought I was the only one who understood, who really got you. And... And I keep thinking, you're still the same. Underneath it all, you're still a nice, caring person. But I don't know anymore, I think I was an idiot for ever believing you cared." 

         Angelica felt her mind reeling and she fumbled to sit on the bed, the shadows swirling in bruised patterns around the room. Chuckie didn't know what to say or do so he stood there, waiting. Angelica looked straight ahead, fingers gripping the edge of the mattress. He was there, he always had been. Even if she didn't know it, he did. He knew there was more to her then she let on. For a moment she forgot who she was supposed to be and Angelica glanced up. He could see tears welling and she whispered, her voice wavering, "No, don't stop believing."

         Chuckie looked concerned as he sat down by her. "Are you ok?" he questioned, pools of slippery light drifting over his face and his mahogany eyes. Angelica neared closer to him and kissed him, lips pressing to lips. He felt warm and she ran a hand up, twisting fingers in his hair. She wanted to remember, she wanted to see herself the way he did. 

--

         Kimmi wandered down from the upstairs, where she'd been talking with some girl from her Biology class. She was dressed in tight fitted dark jeans and a black sleeveless shirt, a silver watch the only accessory. Her black hair was scrunched into soft waves that reached her shoulders. She brushed by people towards the kitchen, searching around for anyone she knew. Phil said he'd be here but she hadn't seen him yet, she had talked to Tommy for a little bit before some drunk girl had forced her way into the conversation to flirt with him shamelessly. She still hadn't seen her brother yet but she was sure he was hiding out someplace quiet or something, maybe even in his car listening to the radio. 

         She entered the kitchen to see a group of some guys standing around laughing. Of course the center of attention was Phil, telling a joke or some story. He was dressed in a plaid button down shirt open to show a white tee shirt underneath and jeans. He was gesturing wildly and spilling alcohol from his cup. 

         Kimmi approached, smiling. "Hey, Phil, there you are. I've been looking for you," she greeted.

         Phil looked over and his eyes were glassy from intoxication. The guys around him glanced at Kimmi too as Phil exclaimed, "Hey, Kimmi, my old pal! I was looking for you too."

         She'd never seen him drunk really, he wasn't big on drinking. She wondered what had changed all of a sudden. "Well I wasn't at the bottom of a cup," Kimmi joked. The group surrounding Phil laughed uproariously at this and Kimmi suspected a lot of them were three sheets to the wind as well.

         Phil chuckled and said, his voice slurred, "Hey, that was funny. You're so funny. No, I was telling them about the time I got called to the principals for stealing the gym teacher's golf cart during class. Remember? He always used it outside and he was chasing after me. God, that was funny." 

         Kimmi nodded and smiled good-naturedly. It was pretty hilarious to see a drunk Phil, even if she was concerned for him. And where was Abbey? It was a girlfriend's job to make sure her boyfriend was ok when he was drunk, not hers. "Phil, how many drinks have you had?" she questioned.

         Phil pressed his lips together and shrugged, causing more liquid to slosh around. "Uh, dunno. Half a keg?" he responded with a laugh, followed by more chuckling from the guys.

         Kimmi laughed and informed, "Ok, drunky, I think we need to get you home. We'll grab a ride with someone. Come on, let's just go get our jackets." She wrapped an arm around his shoulder and allowed him to rest his hand on her waist, guiding him away from the group. There were a few chortles of "Let him stay" by some of the guys but she just kept him walking foreword. 

         Phil stumbled into the dim hallway, leaning heavily against Kimmi. "I think we should stay. I mean, you look so nice. You look really pretty, Kimmi," he said unclearly. 

         The dark haired girl laughed and responded, "Thanks. But since you can't even see straight, I'm not gonna listen to anything you say. Nothing personal, lush."

         There was a pause as they hobbled along before Phil suddenly announced, "Hey, did you hear?"

         "Hear what?" Kimmi humored, not really paying attention because anything he said she probably couldn't believe at this point.

         Phil threw up his hand and sounded dejected when he replied, "Me and Abbey aren't going out anymore. She dumped me, Kimmi. Just dumped me."

         She looked over at him but kept their pace up. "What? Why? I thought things were great," she said in surprise.

         The boy nodded and met her gaze. "So did I! But nope, guess not. She said its 'cause I couldn't tell her if we were steady or not," he explained.

         They came to the door now of the room with their coats and Kimmi pushed the door open, helping Phil walk inside. "I thought you were gonna ask her to go steady at the concert?" she inquired. Kimmi did really feel bad, Phil had seemed to genuinely like this girl... Even if what had happened before left a sour taste in Kimmi's mouth. Still, Phil deserved to be happy.

          Phil pulled Kimmi a little closer to keep him upright and exclaimed, "I was. I thought I was. But... But I couldn't say it. I don't know why. It was like, she was great you know. A cool girl. But I don't know, something wasn't there."

         Kimmi halted them and met Phil's dark glass gaze. She gave him a sympathetic look and replied, "I'm sorry, Phil." So that's why he'd gotten wasted, he was feeling bad over what happened with Abbey. That made Kimmi feel even worse for him, Phil must be pretty hurt for him to want to drown it all away. The girl then rummaged around the huddle of clothes before grabbing out Phil's black jacket. He started pushing his arms in but she quickly helped and began pulling up the zipper. 

         Soon she realized he wasn't moving at all and as she brought the zipper up, she looked at him to see he was staring intently at her. The pallor light swelled over them as Kimmi flushed and asked with a faint smile, "What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

         Phil's eyes were still on her and he replied, almost clearly, "You look really pretty." She paused, the air catching in her throat. She could feel his hands cling to either side of her waist and the space between them grow warm with his breath as he moved foreword. Kimmi's eyelashes flickered and then she pushed him off with her arms.

"What? What's wrong?" he questioned, a little confused.

         Kimmi stepped back a bit farther and her eyes were shivering with dampness. "Phil, you're drunk and you just broke up with your girlfriend! I'm just a good substitute, that's all. But I'm not gonna let that happen again," she breathed and then swung around on her feet. Kimmi walked quickly down the hall and Phil followed as best he could, touching against the wall when he needed to.

          She was just opening the back door when he came to the kitchen. "Kimmi! Kimmi, stop!" he yelled, which wasn't that audible over the din of teenagers. Kimmi pushed past the door and disappeared outside. Phil watched after her, his shoulders sagging, and then mumbled swears under his breath.

         "See, I knew it," a guy's voice butted in. 

         Phil glared over in the direction and saw Izaac close by, standing with a few girls. He had auburn hair that reached past his ears and wore a black button down shirt over a dark brown shirt with jeans. He was tall and lanky, he was a pretty good player on the basketball team if just because of his height. "What the Hell are you talking about, Izaac?" Phil retorted.

         Izaac smirked and said matter-of-factly, "The girl's a total prude. She's hot but really, she's a total Mary."

         Phil glowered at him and snapped in his raspy voice, "Look, I know what you said to her, alright Izaac. You're already on my shit list so shut up."        

         The boy shrugged. "Fine but I don't see why you're defending her. I bet you tried to make a move and she turned you down too. I don't think she even knows what to do with a guy -" he started to sneer.

         Before he could finish, Phil stepped foreword on woozy feet and extended his fist hard into Izaac's face. Knuckles contacted with bone and blood trickled from Izaac's nose. Izaac's eyes swelled with tears and he grasped at his bruised face. "O man! Not again! That hurts so bad!" he belted in a high-pitched voice. The girls by him shrieked and one ran to grab some ice. Most people just glanced over before resuming whatever they were doing.

         Phil shook out his hand, still too drunk to know what he was doing. "Just leave Kimmi alone," he warned and turned to wobble off and find someone to bring him home. He was done drinking; it didn't seem to ever make anything better.

--

         Tommy headed into the kitchen, already sick of this party. It had taken him forever to get that girl to go away, she had even tried to make him dance with her before she ran off to throw up in the bathroom. Then he'd gone back upstairs to find Kimmi wasn't there any longer and neither Chuckie nor Phil were anywhere around either. This night was turning out to be a bust, Chuckie was probably right, they should have just hung out at his house.

         He grabbed a plastic cup and turned towards the keg. A girl was already at it and when she turned around, cup overflowing, he saw it was Lillian. Yup, this night just kept getting better and better. Her moss eyes met his and then she looked away, saying sarcastically, "Sorry, I won't talk to you. I'm not here." Then she pushed by him, her steps uneven and her face a pallid white. 

         Tommy paused, thinking about whether he should just do what was smart and ignore her or go after her. It didn't take long to decide, it was reflexive. He turned and lowered his empty cup, questioning, "How many drinks have you had?"

         Lillian released a short wet laugh and kept walking away. "O yea and you care? Right," she retorted.

         Tommy followed as they entered the shadowed corridor. "I never said that," he countered coldly before continuing a little more concerned, "But you look like you're about to pass out." 

         They went down the hallway and she stared ahead, glaring. "Hey, news flash, Tommy. This isn't my first time at a party. I know my limit. And you're not my brother, in fact we're not even friends," Lillian snipped, her words slightly garbled. There was a flight of stairs they came to and Lillian started climbing them, trailed by Tommy who mostly was there to make sure she didn't fall backwards in her intoxicated haze.

         "If you know your limit then how come Phil's always saying your friends have to carry you home at two in the morning every weekend?" Tommy prodded knowingly.

         The girl paused, swaying on her feet. She turned her head sharply to glare at Tommy and object, "So what, I went overboard a few times. And again, not your problem." Then Lillian continued onward, up the thinly lit steps. 

         They reached the top and Tommy retorted evenly, "You're right, its not. It's not my problem you're doing all this just to fit in."

         Lillian's eyes narrowed and she stepped foreword down the small hallway. She slammed her hand into a door, loudly pushing it open, and remarked, "Shut up."

         Tommy followed but stopped a little ways in. It was a dark bedroom, the only light the swollen moon hanging in the windows. "You've really changed," he stated, staring at her.

         The girl rolled her eyes as she turned around, smiling bitterly. "I'm a new improved Lillian. I thought you'd be happy. Don't act like you ever noticed me before," she declared. Lillian was trying to make him feel guilty, she always was doing that, so she'd never have to blame herself for anything. It was her way out.

         Except Tommy wasn't falling for it this time and he shook his head, ignoring that she even said anything at all. "I get these flashes... of who you use to be. Like in my room or in Chuckie's car or in your kitchen that day after school. When no one's around and you're like you use to be. But that's all they are huh? Just quick glimpses and this is who you want to be now? Ok fine, I see it now. I finally realize and I feel like an idiot for ever caring," he thought out loud.

         Lillian wavered in place and glared at him. "Yea well. It's about time," she replied cruelly.

         Tommy just nodded, not recognizing who he was looking at right now. "You're right, it is. You've really changed and it's too bad. Because all these people? This act? It's not real and you're not like them," he told her.

         Her eyes were wet pearls now in the light and she cried, "How do you know what I'm like! You don't know me anymore, Tommy! You don't!"

         Tommy met her stare and exclaimed, "I do! I know that in the second grade you went home crying because Paul Depont looked up your skirt in the playground and in seventh grade you won second place in the talent show! And I know none of those people out there are half as smart or funny or caring or..." He trailed off wearily, breathing in a swell of air. There was a pause and then he finished, "No one out there will ever know you as well as I do." Tommy gazed at her a moment longer before looking down and turning around. He opened the door and then closed it behind him, she could hear his footsteps treading down the stairs as he went.

          Lillian stared after him, her breath slipping in currents from her lungs. She sat down on the bed and then placed her cup on the side table, her eyes flickering ahead damply. She felt dazed and fuzzy along the edges but still, there wasn't enough numbness. She ran her thumb along her bottom lip and tears slipped silver threads down her cheeks. Minutes passed like this before the door creaked open.

         "Hey, there you are! I've been looking all over for you!" she heard a voice exclaim and she looked over to see a smiling Brett. He was dressed in a green long sleeved shirt and jeans, his sandy blonde hair a little mused. 

         Lillian sniffed slightly and forced on a smile as well. "Oh, hey. Sorry," she greeted.

         Brett raised his shoulders once and started walking foreword. "It's ok. Michael's car broke down so it took us forever. We had to call a tow truck and everything-" he began to explain before he paused. He could see the dampness to her face in the metallic moonlight and his eyes widened in concern. "Are you alright, Lillian? Did something happen?" he asked.

          Lillian tried shaking her head and reply, "No, I'm ok." But her words broke on the end with new tears and she turned her head away from him, pressing her eyes shut.

          Brett sat down by her and whispered, "Are you ok?" Then he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close to him, and she dropped her head to his shoulder, pressing her wet cheek to his shirt.   

          Breathing in deeply to start to regain herself, she pulled away and nodded. "I'm fine," she responded and smiled faintly. His eyes were questioning still when she pressed her lips to his, a mix of alcohol and salty tears. She pushed herself along him so there wasn't even a fracture of space between them, running her fingers up his neck. And it all happened too fast. 

         Later that night, she stared at the wall. The grayness was melting from her and she was starting to think a little clearer. She could hear Brett breathing nearby. She knew she had wanted to prove Tommy wrong, this was really her now, not some attempt to fit in. But now, staring at the wallpaper pattern, she felt like this whole thing was a lie. The numbness was gone and everything felt really hollow. She was alone.

--  
  


         Chuckie had been awake for a few minutes already, the morning light filtering in through the windows. Angelica was lying by him and no, it wasn't a dream. He remembered there had been some kissing but nothing else. Then Angelica had passed out and he'd fallen asleep and everything was very innocent. He yawned and propped himself up by his elbows. 

         White light puddled under Angelica's eyelashes like sand and she flickered open. There was red spiked hair and chocolate eyes and... O my God, Chuckie Finister! Everything rushed back to the girl in a tidal and she sprang up into a sitting position. "O wow. O my God. I uh, I better get home. My bedroom window better be unlocked," she started to fumble for words, climbing from the bed. 

         The boy sat up and questioned, "So what does this mean?"

         Angelica was combing her hair straight with her fingers when she cocked an eyebrow and responded, "Huh?"

         Chuckie shrugged, continuing, "Are we dating? What?"

         Angelica forced on a strained smile and paused from making her hair perfect. "It means... I had fun, you had fun. Let's call it a day," she said.

         The boy stared at her, his eyes hurt. "Are you ditching me?" he went on.

         Angelica winced and then sighed. "Chuckie, come on. You know who I am. I'm captain of the cheerleading team, I'm on the school events board. You're... Well, I wouldn't have many friends if they knew what happened," she explained, brutally honest.

         Chuckie looked confused, his eyebrows raised. "But... everything you said?" he stumbled to say.

         She seemed regretful, her eyes creased. "I know but nothing's changed, Chuckie," she replied softly.

         Chuckie gave her a hard stare and stood up, straightening out his clothes. "I guess not. You don't have to spell it out for me, Angelica. Just leave already," he retorted as unfeeling as he could.

          Angelica nodded and went to grab her purse on the chair. Then she looked at him and tried to say, "Chuckie, I'm..." She halted and then glanced down again. Angelica turned and was out the door. 

         Chuckie watched her go and brushed himself off. Once again she'd played him for the fool and he was done. There wasn't going to be any more of this game, no more public insults or even speaking to her. He was wrong, she was never anything more then who she was on the surface. He was done.

--

**Closing Notes: **Happy Valentine's Day! Well what a depressing party! Lol. I seriously had no intentions of making this R but I really wanted to make it more true to life and hey, now I can. And yes, Lillian is only a Freshman and she's way too young to have done what she did. (She's 15 in this story) But Brett's older and sometimes those things do happen, of course I'm not saying its right. Also that's a negative aspect of drinking in high school. I didn't want to make it like parties are so great because in reality they're not.  

So Abbey is gone! About time, ha ha. But she may have made Phil realize something that he never let himself think before. Will it finally give him the courage to do something he should have a long time ago? And can I just say, even if I don't condone drinking, I liked drunk Phil. He was silly. Lol. Sorry C/A people! I felt like such a jerk when writing this chapter, I'm so screwing around with you guys! At least they made a little progress but Angelica needs to get over her image thing first and realize there is a life outside of high school. And she's use to getting what she wants when she wants it, but it may not be that way for long. Tommy and Lillian aren't what you'd call friends. (Wow, that's putting it nicely.) He's sick of her selfishness and taking him for granted whenever she feels like it. There will be a nice change for them in the future that I think T/L people will appreciate, at least I know I will! Lol. 


	9. Chapter Nine: The Beginning Of Fall

**Disclaimer: **Just the usual "yadda yadda yadda". Don't own **Rugrats**, wish I did. Then there'd be a "Rugrats: Later Years" with real teens, lol. O yea and this is back to PG-13. A few people were kind enough to say what I was thinking too, it's really not that bad to be R. I was just overly paranoid I'd get a flame or something for corrupting some poor kid, with all the underage drinking and stuff. But, hey, not much worse then what you'd see on any television show today so oh well.

Also I don't know much about football so I'm not going to mention a lot about that. I'm pretty sure I have the basics right, I know what the quarterback does and that stuff. Still I could be wrong about this, I'm not a big fan. So yea, tell me if I am!

**Brief Synopsis: **Phil may have finally realized something he was too afraid to ever admit (i.e. Huge P/K change and a good one at that!), something occurs that makes Lillian realize when she needs someone she ultimately goes to one person, some actual Tommy and Lillian banter, and Chuckie... the babe magnet?

**Splintered Reflections**

By Heather [TinySweetHeart]

--

Chapter Nine: The Beginning Of Fall 

You can say the sun is shining if you really want to  
I can see the moon and it seems so clear  
You can take the road that takes you to the stars now  
I can take a road that'll see me through  
I can take a road that'll see me through.

-- "Road" -- Nick Drake  --

--

         Tommy was browsing down the aisle of a local drug store, trying to remember the name of the hairspray his mom had asked for. Outside tiptoeing gray clouds scattered over a white sun laced sky. It was an uneventful Saturday morning when the town was lazily bustling, it wasn't helping their strange cold front hadn't dissipated yet, speaking of a fast approaching autumn. Tommy sighed inwardly and wondered silently whether it was Ocean Mist or Aqua Mist. He was dressed in jeans and a green and white long sleeved shirt.  

         A recognizable voice called, "Tommy!" He looked over to see Kimmi approaching, smiling. She was also carrying a basket and wearing khakis and a moss green hooded sweater, her dark hair brushing her shoulders. 

         "Hey, Kimmi. What's up?" he greeted back, returning her grin.

         Kimmi shrugged casually and then replied, "Nothing much, just grabbing some stuff. O hey, do you know Natalie?" Kimmi gestured behind her and Tommy glanced past her.

         A girl followed Kimmi close behind and she was smiling nervously. Natalie had medium length black hair and sea blue eyes; she was dressed in jeans with a wide pink belt and a black and pink stripped sweater, dangling earrings completing the outfit. "No. Hey," Tommy responded, realizing distantly that she was really pretty.

         Kimmi went on to point at Tommy. "Natalie, this is Tommy. She just moved here from Oregon. I've been showing her around," she informed. Then she peaked over Tommy's shoulder and exclaimed, "Oooo, be right back! I see the conditioner I need!" Kimmi brushed by Tommy and down the aisle, leaving the two alone.

         It could have felt awkward but it really didn't, Natalie just appeared very approachable. "So, what do you think of this town? Bored yet?" Tommy asked jokingly.

         Natalie laughed and shoved one hand into her denim pocket. "Its ok, I'm getting use to it. Besides, it can't be worse then my hometown. We went bowling every Saturday night, enough said," she replied.

         Tommy mock winced and remarked, "Ouch, that is bad."

         The girl was glancing at Tommy's basket when she reached out, curiously lifting something from it. "Hmmm, ruby red number 8? I don't think that's your color," she retorted sarcastically, holding a bottle of nail polish. 

         He flushed a little and shifted on his feet. "Yea. My mom asked me to grab her stuff too," he said with a smile.

         Natalie arched an eyebrow before nodding appreciatively. "O well how very chivalrous of you," she stated and placed it back in his basket.

         Tommy shrugged and kidded in response, "Yea well I used up all her ruby red number 8 last night anyway so I figured I should get her more."

         She laughed and her eyes flecked with the beginnings of a friendship. "Right, you probably should," she added, nodding.

         Kimmi bounded between them suddenly, basket swinging at her hip. "Alright, they had the conditioner I wanted that smells like gummy bears. You ready to go, Natalie? That movie starts in like a half hour so we better leave now..." she interjected, looking at Natalie. She swung her eyes on Tommy now, realizing she was being rude. "Oh Tommy, you wanna go? It's not a chick flick, I swear," she offered.

         Tommy shook his head, looking down at the mounds of colored paper and markers he had to buy. "No thanks. I have a huge project to do and tomorrow's the game so I have to finish it today," he replied.

         Kimmi nodded and said, "O right. I might go to that. You wanna go to the football game tomorrow, Natalie?" She was doing her part to make Natalie feel accepted in her new school and well, it did feel nice to have a girl for a friend after being surrounded by testosterone for far too long. Maybe she was trying to desperately replace Phil as her close friend too.

         Natalie squinted, scrunching up her nose. "Ahhh, football? I'm not big on watching two guys slam their helmets together," she reasoned.

         Tommy's laughed and raised his eyebrows; Natalie certainly wasn't the typical girl from around here anyway. "There's a little more to it then that you know," he objected.

         She nodded and replied exaggeratedly, "Right, there's that whole knock some poor person unconscious thing." Tommy rolled his eyes at this and she grinned, continuing slightly flirtatious, "But fine, I'll go. I'll give violence a chance. Just to cheer you on."

         Tommy smiled and matched her stare. "Awesome," he said. Kimmi watched the two, her eyes flickering from Tommy to Natalie and back again, aware there was a little of something going on here.

         Natalie glanced downward, blushing slightly, and then replied, "See you." She headed down the aisle, toward the check out. 

Kimmi turned also to follow when Tommy called, "Oh hey, Kimmi. You talk to Phil lately? I haven't heard from him all weekend."

She paused and looked over at him, shrugging blankly. "No and you know, its not like I have Phil on a leash or something. Call him if you want," she retorted.

Tommy nodded and went on, "Yea I will. I just thought, you know, since you guys use to be attached at the hip you'd know."

Kimmi blinked away the warm light slipping in from outside and objected bitterly, "Yea well, things change. Bye Tommy." Then she turned and continued walking towards the counter, leaving Tommy to decide between Ocean Mist and Aqua Mist.

--

         The bleachers were already crowding with the clapping and whooping of teenagers and parents. The game had yet to start but their team was pretty good and usually gathered a large crowd. The bleaching white sun glanced over the treetops and across the field, there was the thick smell of wood stoves in the air. Tommy stood by the sideline, with a few of his teammates nearby preparing for the game, drinking water, readying their equipment. He scanned the faces in the crowd and spotted Kimmi and Natalie somewhere near the top. They were bundled in thin jackets and scarves, Kimmi smiled and waved. Tommy waved back and grinned. He caught sight of his parents too, his mom waved a mittened hand at him and his father cheered out his name. Tommy laughed and waved to them as well.

         Turning around, he was adjusting his helmet when he looked over, down towards the end of the bench. Lillian was standing with Brett, smiling and wishing him luck. He kissed her and then walked off to grab water. Lillian watched after him and then turned, meeting Tommy's stare accidentally. The blades of light outlined her and her eyes flashed with regret. Then she turned, looking down, and walked off to join the cheerleaders, who had started exciting the crowd

         "Alright, on the field! Get into your positions!" their couch shouted. Tommy stared down at his helmet and shook off any lingering thoughts. Then he put on his helmet and jogged out to his position, ready to start the game.

         The two teams squared off and the rest of the football game passed by pretty evenly matched. However their team were leading by a few points and Tommy was able to score a touchdown in the earlier part of the game. He could hear his mom shrilly screaming out his name as he rose from the end zone and smiled as teammates slapped him with high fives and pats on the back. The game continued on and it was third quarter when Brett was hiked the ball. Darting his eyes around, he waited a minute too long to pass off the ball as players hustled around him. A large guy from the other team slammed into him, colliding him into the hard earth on his left side. He could hear the penetrating crunching of bones and flesh before everything went quiet and black. The crowd waited with baited breath; there was almost an audible silence that passed, as everyone watched to see if Brett would get up. The other player who had nailed him had already stood up and distanced himself, but Brett remained motionless. 

         Lillian's hazel eyes swelled and she dropped her pom poms to the ground, the first one to run out towards the field. The couch followed as well, jogging out to his fallen player. Falling to her knees beside him, Lillian questioned with tears in her throat, "Brett? Brett?"

         The couch came beside her and bent down, holding up his wrist. He paused before stating, as was the usual protocol, "He has a pulse."

         This felt too surreal to Lillian, surely this couldn't happen with high school football, someone shouldn't even be wondering whether or not her boyfriend would have a pulse. She knew enough not to move him but she couldn't help but touch his shoulder, wanting to wake him by some miracle. He would wake up, of course he would, of course. "Oh God. What's the matter with him?" she exclaimed, glancing up at the couch for help.

         The man shook his head, responding gravely, "I don't know." Looking over towards the sidelines were people stood by helplessly, he yelled, "Someone get the medics!" Then, turning back to the still form of Brett, he knelt down on one knee and questioned, "Brett? Brett, boy, can you hear me?"

         It felt like time was stretching out, capturing them in this moment, and it was minutes before suddenly Lillian noticed Brett's eyelids quivering. Finally they slid open and he shifted his gaze around in confusion. "Coach? Lillian?" he asked, his voice dry and uncertain.

         Lillian released a breath she hadn't even known she was holding and smiled slightly, taking his hand. "I'm here, Brett," she replied with heavy relief. See, of course he was fine, and now he'd stand up and everything would be like it was.

         The couch remained restrained as he went on to say, "How you feelin'? You alright, boy?"

         Brett removed his helmet, nodding, his sandy hair clinging to his forehead with sweat. "I think so. Let me just sit up..." he started to reply and leaned up. He came halfway before groaning slightly and lying back, his eyes flickering with disbelief. When he looked up at them again, his voice was fearful as he exclaimed, "Coach, I can't... I can't feel my leg. What's the matter with my leg?" 

         Lillian's dewy eyes flashed with panic and the couch grimaced, replying, "I don't know, son." Then he looked back at the crowd and the people watching, yelling in frustration, "Medic! Someone get the medic for God's sake!" 

         It all felt unbelievable, like a faded dream, as the ambulance workers scattered over to them, lifting Brett onto a stretcher carefully. Lillian watched Brett glancing around scared and in shock and she reached out to take his hand. "I'm going with you," she said, following. 

--

         There are quiet spots in hospitals, where the nurses don't usually frequent and the hallways echo with bare silence. Lillian was submerged in one of those little hiding places, a few chairs that could be a sort of waiting room by a couple vending machines. Magazines were strewn about on a small table and the white walls were blinding in the florescent lights. She sat there, still in her cheerleading uniform, staring down at the tiles, lost in thought.

         "This seat taken?"

         She blinked her gaze up to see Tommy walking towards her. He was dressed in jeans and a plaid button up shirt over a navy long sleeved shirt. She was shocked to see him, of all people, but at the moment nothing really seemed that unlikely. "Everyone already left. Brett's in surgery right now," she replied unreadably, not answering his question.

         Tommy sat down on the chair by her, shrugging. "Yea I know. I figured you might want some company," he stated. 

         Lillian knew there was a lot to be said, a lot of unanswered questions, a lot to apologize for. But all she could do was stare ahead and reply, "Thanks." 

         There they sat in the stillness, side by side, staring ahead at the empty walls. Finally Tommy's voice ruptured the silence, "I hate hospitals. I always remember when I was six and I had to get stitches in my head because I was wrestling with Dil and got knocked into a coffee table. But at least I could make him feel guilty for the rest of his life."

         The girl arched her eyebrows and responded, "You know, I actually remember that."

         Tommy glanced over at her in disbelief and retorted, "No way."

         Lillian turned her face to him, smiling faintly. "I totally do! And the next day Phil and I went to your house to watch some tape and your head was all bandaged up. You looked like a mummy. Then you showed us your stitches and it was so disgusting. Yea, thanks a lot, I'm just now getting my appetite back, by the way," she informed and then stared ahead again. 

         Tommy grinned slightly and admitted, "Wow, I was a prick when I was little."

         Lillian nodded. "Yea, you were. Nothing's changed," she replied matter-of-factly and remained straight-faced. 

         The boy looked to her and exclaimed in mock indignant, "Hey."

         Lillian smiled and laughed, continuing, "Kidding."  He chuckled to himself and shook his head, looking down. There was a pause as Lillian shifted her eyes around, at the sterile room. God, she was in a hospital, this was real. This was really happening and at least someone was there with her to try and get by it all. "You know what I hate about hospitals? The smell. It's like a mix of latex gloves and feet," she breathed.

         Tommy raised his eyebrows and remarked, "Well you know, people are sick here. Life and death stuff. Sorry they can't make it smell like roses for you, Lillian."

         She smiled slightly ahead and when she replied it was in a perfect Angelica impersonation, "They should. I mean, don't they know who I am? I'm freakin' important with a capital **I** ok."

         Tommy laughed slightly and commented, "You just sounded so much like my cousin I was scared."

         The girl nodded and responded, pressing her head back against the wall, "Yea I scared myself a little too. You know, she's not always like that."

         Tommy grinned sarcastically and scoffed, "Right. When she's not eating kittens and riding on her broom."

         Lillian rolled her eyes and objected, "Really, she's not! If you got to know her, you'd know that. She can actually be pretty cool sometimes."

         Tommy crossed his arms and stared at the long hallway ahead. "Well thanks but no thanks," he said back.

         There was a comfortable silence between them then, as they each drifted into their own thoughts. Somewhere far off, a cart squeaked on wheels, pushed along linoleum before it finally halted. "You know, you were doing really great out there today, before everything," Lillian eventually spoke up.

         Tommy sat up a little and shook his head. "No, I was just ok today," he replied.

         Lillian's eyes turned to him and she smiled. "No, you were great! Seriously. Brett thinks you're going to get scouted," she admitted.

         Tommy couldn't help feeling surprised the star player of their team had said that about him. "Really?" he questioned.

         Nodding, Lillian went on, "Yea, we were talking about it. You're only going to get better. Brett said by the time you're a Senior you'll be better then anyone out there."

         The boy smiled slightly, humbly, and replied, "I don't know. Brett, he's really good. He's going to get recruited. I mean, well..." His voice trailed off as he realized the possibility, the uncertainty if Brett would even play again, if he'd be well enough to get a football scholarship. 

         Lillian was pulled back to reality and looked ahead again. "Yea," she replied quietly.

         There was another pause in time before Tommy glanced over at Lillian again. "You hungry?" he questioned.

         Drawn from her whirlwind thoughts, she gazed sideways and responded, "Starving."

         Tommy pointed to the vending machines and offered, "Candy bar?"

         Lillian smiled slightly. "Ok," she said.

         He started fishing through his jean pockets, searching out wades of dollars and coins. "Let me see what I have here. I'm kinda broke at the moment..." he admitted.

         Still smiling, she arched her eyebrows and suggested, "I can buy, Tommy..."

         Tommy raised a hand and jokingly shook off her offer. "No, no. My treat," he replied.

         Lillian laughed and remarked, "I owe you."

         Staring over at her, he teased, "Yea and you better give me the fifty cents. I'm serious." To this Lillian rolled her eyes and Tommy finally rummaged around for enough change. Standing, he went over to the machines and started jamming in a few coins. "Ok, it just ate a quarter. Stupid machine. Maybe I should get someone?" he grumbled, punching in a few buttons for the money to return back out but that obviously wasn't working. 

         The girl shook her head, lifting herself up to sit Indian style on her chair and then rubbing her hands together to keep away the threadbare chill in the air. "I haven't seen anyone around here in awhile. Seriously, this is where they keep the people they don't want to have to deal with I think. We can just share. Grab a Reeses," she said. 

         Tommy nodded, remarking, "That's my favorite."

         Lillian smiled softly and replied, "I know."

         The boy stopped himself from thinking of anything more, now was not the time to think about how much he missed her or talking like this with her. He turned, pushing in the rest of the money and then the appropriate button. Soon he was walking back over and opening the wrapper. He passed her a chocolate cup and smirked, "Here ya go. And don't say I never gave you anything."

         Lillian nodded seriously and started eating her snack. "Wow. A whole Reeses. Thank you so much. And you wonder why you don't have a girlfriend," she quipped.

         Raising his eyebrows in a wounded expression, he replied, "Well ouch. That hurt."

         Lillian smiled slightly and rolled her eyes. Releasing a sigh, she went on to say, "No it didn't. You know there are plenty of girls in school who would love to share a Reeses with you."

         Tommy grew a little too excited over this idea and questioned, "Why? Am I what you girls talk about in the bathroom?"

         She nodded fake seriously and responded, staring down at her candy, "O yea. We just talk about how great and cute you are. There is even a Tommy Fan Club, its awesome. We have tee shirts, mugs, we had stickers but those were all sold out."

         He gave her a deadpan stare and retorted, "You're joking."

         Lillian looked over at him with a smile and relinquished, "Yea."

         Sighing, Tommy shook his head. "And to think, I wasted a Reeses on you," he mused to himself.

         The girl nodded, finishing up with her food and licking at her fingers. "I know, that was good too. It makes me want milk though," she replied.

         "Yea me too," Tommy agreed. Then, looking over at her, he went on to ask, "How long you gonna stay here for?"

         Lillian shrugged, staring down at her hands in her lap. "I'm not sure. I keep thinking I'm going to leave any minute now but I just can't. Not until they tell me he's ok, he's out of surgery. But that's stupid, I don't even know how long it's going to take," she said.

         "Is he ok?" Tommy questioned.

         She still couldn't meet his eyes as she informed, "His left leg was broken in two parts, and he's got a crushed pelvis. They said he's going through six hours of surgery right now, and he's probably going to need more."

          Tommy felt a weight in his stomach, at least everything was fixable with surgery but still, that was a pretty major injury. He'd have to be in a wheelchair, probably get pins in place, go through physical therapy. Brett had always seemed like an ok guy; even after all the stuff Tommy had said when he started dating Lillian. It made him feel a little bad now that he thought about it and Brett certainly didn't deserve this. When stuff like this happened you had to put away all your past resentments. "Are his parents ok?" he wondered.

         Nodding slightly, she interlocked her fingers and responded, "I saw them. They seem fine, just worried. It could have been a lot worse; the doctor said he's lucky he's not paralyzed."

         Staring at her, he said in a concerned voice, "Are you ok?"

         Lillian looked upward now, facing him, and pushed back a strand of chestnut hair behind her ear. "I'm fine," she stated with an underlying sad note. Her eyes were damp when she went on, softly, "It was just scary. How much everything can change in an instant, you know."

         Tommy nodded, glancing ahead, and replied distantly, "Yea." 

         The girl was staring at him and her eyes flickered over the outline of his face. He was always there, no matter what. No matter how much they had yelled at each other the other week or how much she had let him down, he was still always there for her. Always. And suddenly she thought about how she couldn't imagine him not being there. Lillian's voice was flecked with urgency when she whispered, "Promise me this will never happen to you ok."

         He looked over at her again, a little surprised, but then he nodded slightly. "Promise," he responded simply, even when he knew that was an impossible thing to promise someone. Then they were both looking ahead again and the silence moved fluidly around them. And he waited with her.

--

           
         Tommy sat at his computer desk, typing up a paper for his English class. The whole Monday school day had been pretty uneventful, with most people talking about what had occurred to Brett. Lillian hadn't been to school, she probably had stayed home to let whatever buzz there was die down and be with Brett at his hospital room when he came out of unconsciousness from surgery. The burnt orange sunlight filtered in through his window and he was dressed in jeans and white long sleeved shirt with a red logo.    

         Suddenly there was a knock at his door and a familiar voice called from the other side, "Open up! Police!"

         Tommy smiled to himself and circled around on his chair as the door swung open to reveal Phil. "That stopped being funny around the third grade, Phil," he replied.

         Phil grinned back cockily. "When will you learn? Most of the time I just say stuff to make **me** laugh," he remarked. The boy was wearing jeans and a short sleeved dark blue polo shirt over a long sleeved white shirt. 

         Tommy laughed and shook his head. "So what's up?" he questioned.

         Phil shrugged, responding, "Nothing much. I'm running to get food, you wanna go?"

         Tommy nodded, turning to save his computer file. "Yea, sure," he said.

         Phil flopped onto Tommy's bed, lying back and propping himself up on his elbows. "Cool. I had to get out of my house anyway. Now because my sister's boyfriend's in the hospital suddenly I can't even speak to her without my parents yelling at me. Because they didn't just catch her coming home at five AM a few weeks ago, because she's not queen of the alcoholics. No, now she's innocent little Ms Perfect because her boyfriend's got a broken leg," he admitted with annoyance.

         Tommy turned in his chair to shoot him an irritated look and counter, "Its broken in two places, Phil. He's got a crushed pelvis. That is pretty bad."

         Phil rolled his eyes and snorted, "Come on, it's _Brett_. Its rough but hey, maybe its life telling him to keep his pants on."

         Tommy completely swiveled the chair around now, his brow knitted with a little too much concern. "What? Why? She tell you something?" he asked.

         Phil cringed and snorted, "What? No, I was just joking. I mean, I don't know what they do. God, gross, if she ever tried sharing all that stuff with me like I was Opra or something..." As the initial disgust wore off, Phil became aware of something else and looked over at Tommy accusingly, "She told me how you stayed with her at the hospital."

         Tommy shrugged, glancing down. "Oh yea, well you know. I was there and I saw her sitting there by herself. I didn't want her to be alone," he reasoned.

         Phil's voice rose with anger and exasperation. "Why not! She's my sister but even I know she's been a bitch to you, Tommy!" he exclaimed.

         Tommy looked over at Phil and started to object, "I know, but maybe we can be friends..."

         Phil's eyes were wide with understanding and he was shaking his head with disbelief. Smiling sardonically, he stated, "You like her."

         Tommy creased his brow and tried to sound convincing when he replied, "What? No."

         Phil sat up straight now and cried, "Oh come on! You do, Tommy. And it's a big mistake."

Tommy cut him with a glare but it was less then sure. "Look, Phil, I'm not stupid. I know she's screwed me over but that still doesn't change we use to all be friends. And maybe we can be again. I mean, right now she needs me -" he began to say.

Phil interrupted, scoffing in a low voice, "No, dude, you're her stand-in boyfriend."

Tommy shook his head and remarked angrily, "You don't get it, Phil."

         Phil stood from the bed, looking frustrated and defeated. "Fine, whatever. When she turns on you again, don't complain to me about it," he huffed, walking towards the door to leave.

         Tommy rose from his chair as well and shot after him, "You know, Phil, what you're doing with Kimmi. That's not being smart, that's being scared."

         This caused Phil to freeze in place before spinning around. In the heat of the moment he didn't feel like denying it any longer anyway, so what if Tommy knew he had feelings for Kimmi. So what, because he was smart enough to just leave it at that, not risk everything. "Yea, so what! Because I don't want to get hurt or to hurt Kimmi! But you, Tommy, its like you're blind! Lillian's going to end up using you again!" he shouted.

         Tommy met his glare and responded, "Yea well, at least I'll know I tried, there won't be any 'What If's. That's more then I can say for you."

         Phil shook his head slightly and turned, storming out the door. Tommy could hear him along the hall and then he was gone. Tommy sat back down in his chair and turned around, staring at the screen. He forced himself to continue with his paper, because he didn't need to think about what Phil had said. He was wrong, he didn't understand, Tommy could handle himself when it came to Lillian, he wasn't an idiot. This time he didn't expect much so there was less of a risk, at least that's what he told himself. 

--

         God, who knew there were so many freaking words for modes of transportation in Spanish? Tren, autobus, coche, taxi, bici, para caminar. Really, who cares? All you need to know is they all get you somewhere, preferably a mall. Angelica tapped her pen against her desk and rested her chin on her hand, trying hard not to nod off as their teacher rambled at the board. The girl was dressed in a pale blue long sleeved shirt layered over a white tank top and a pleated white skirt, her flaxen hair pulled half back. 

         A girl nearby, who was pretty popular and a Junior as well, leaned over towards Angelica's desk. Her name was Hillary and she was fairly attractive, with long curly brown hair and dark eyes. She was dressed in a red sweater and black pants. "What's up with Chuckie Finster?" she questioned quietly.

         Angelica's eyes flickered over to where Chuckie sat and she had to admit, she had been wondering the same thing when she watched him walk into class that day, something actually she'd been realizing for over a week now. Was he taller or something? His braces were off, that much she was sure. And his clothes weren't so bad, his hair was a little shorter as well so he must have had a trim. But really... what was it? "I don't... know," Angelica mumbled in disbelief because truly, she didn't, but there was just something about him. 

         Hillary was staring at Chuckie as well when she went on, "Well whatever it is, he's like hot now."

         Angelica could scarcely believe it was her saying it but all the same, she breathed, "Yea..."

         The girl's voice jolted her from her own thoughts when she questioned, "You think he'd go for me?"

         Angelica turned to face her and reply, "What?"

         Hillary shrugged, flushing slightly. "You know, go out with me?" she went on.

         Angelica glared, crossing her legs. "Why are you asking me? I don't know. He's just a Sophmore anyway," she retorted.

         Hillary nodded and then glanced over at Chuckie again. "Yea but... He's like hot now. I'm gonna ask him if he'll go to the dance with me after class," she said dreamily.

         Angelica looked over at Chuckie and scoffed, "Well fine, if you wanna settle for him."

         Hillary furrowed her slender eyebrows at Angelica and sat back into her seat, giving her a questioning glare. "Whatever, Angelica," she snorted and went back to pretending to listen to their teacher.

         Angelica was furious. She didn't exactly know with _who_, all she knew was she was pissed off. And it had a lot to do with Chuckie Finster. "Wow, you finally combed that huge mop of hair so I can see the blackboard," she shot just loud enough for the boy and a lot of others to hear, smirking.

         Chuckie kept his gaze ahead and sighed. "Angelica, maybe you don't get it because you were dropped on your head a few times at practice. But me not turning around? Yea, that means I don't care," he remarked coldly.

         Teens around her stifled their laughter at this and Angelica crossed her arms, making a loud humphing noise. Her gaze was burning, what exactly had happened? To make Chuckie suddenly the one with the upper hand in all of this, the one who called the shots? He was suddenly confident and acting like he didn't need her, that was the "_big change_", and suddenly other people where starting to realize what she had. She knew who she was furious with, as much as she wanted to deny it she was mad at herself. And it had a lot to do with Chuckie Finster. God, how she despised Spanish class.

--

         Lillian walked down the hallway connecting B wing from the C wing of their high school, the early morning sunlight falling in ribbons down from the skylights overhead. She carried a few notebooks up to her chest protectively and was wearing jeans and a white long sleeved shirt with a shell necklace, her hair down in natural waves. There were a few clusters of students along the lockers and walls, they were all talking is hushed voices and when they noticed her, they paused, giving her their hollow smiles before returning back to their whispering after she passed by. She knew what they were saying. "_Isn't it horrible! I feel so bad, he's still in the hospital. He might be like crippled! God, she couldn't even go to school yesterday, I bet it was too hard._" It wasn't like they were saying anything cruel or callous but still, it didn't make her feel any less alone.

         She saw the windows of their school library and the twin doors, past the glass she caught sight of a familiar figure at a table. Lillian walked straight, pressing open the doors, and past the rows of shelves lined with books. A few librarians watched over the students, this was also where studies were held so there were a good amount of teenagers at their tables but they all had their noses in books or homework they had forgotten to do last night. Smiling, she slid into the opposite seat and said, "Well I don't think staring at a blank paper will make something appear on it, Tommy. Just a guess."

         Tommy blinked up at her, surprised, and then grinned. "Oh, hey... You sure? Even if I stare at it for an hour?" he responded, looking back down at said clear paper. He was dressed in jeans and a black long sleeved shirt.

         She nodded and placed her stuff on the table. "Yup, pretty sure. So, what is it for?" Lillian asked.

         The boy groaned, leaning back and shaking his head. "English. We have to write an exploding moment on some current topic, like the death penalty. I hate creative writing, I'm not good at it," he replied.

         Lillian admitted, "I love exploding moments, they're fun." 

         Tommy gave her a disbelieving look, cocking an eyebrow, and remarked, "Did you just say exploding moments are "_fun_"? Wow and I thought I was a geek."

         She smiled back mock sweetly and shot, "You still are. But they really are, you can write whatever you want. What could be more fun then that?"

         The boy looked around and replied jokingly, "Uh a lot of things actually. Geometry. Sticking this pencil in my eye." He held up his pencil to make his point and Lillian rolled her eyes.

         Resting back in her chair, she crossed her arms. "Uh hu, well Mr. Smart Ass, let me know how that goes for you," she teased.

         Tommy smiled and continued, his elbows on the table, "I'm kidding. You have to help me anyway. You owe me, remember the Reeses?"

         Lillian raised her moss eyes to the ceiling and exclaimed, "Oh God yea, a whole Reeses. What am I thinking? I should be carrying you around on my shoulders."

         Tommy shook his head, comically humble. "No, that's ok. Just put a good word in for me with my fan club," he replied.

         She laughed and retorted, "Of course." Then she sat further upright and leaned against the table, fixing Tommy with a questioning stare. "So what's up with Chuckie?" she asked.

         Tommy looked clueless when he said, "What do you mean?"

         Lillian continued on, shrugging, "Everyone's talking about it, well a few girls anyway. He's... changed. He just seems different."

         The boy scratched the back of his neck distractedly and responded, "I dunno. I talked to him this morning, he doesn't seem different to me. His braces are off, maybe he grew like an inch, but that's about it."

         Lillian glanced out the window, a scattering of morning light creasing over her face. "He just seems more confident, I guess. You wouldn't notice anyway, it's a girl thing," she commented matter-of-factly.

         "Oh really?" Tommy asked.

         She nodded and went on, "Yea, guys don't care about that stuff. But if a guy's confidant, no matter who he is or what he looks like, girls are going to notice. Every girl knows that."

         Tommy looked serious when he mused, "Huh. We need to hang out more, you can teach me this stuff."

         Smiling, she scoffed, "Yea and what, create a monster? I don't think so, Don Juan."

         Suddenly the librarian was glaring at them severely from her desk and raising a finger to her lips. "Shhh!" she warned. The pair looked over at her before turning to face the table and laugh quietly under their breath.

         Still laughing, Tommy questioned, "So what are you doing in my study? Besides getting me in trouble?"

         The smile on her lips turned bittersweet as she fingered the edge of her notebook. "I'm supposed to be in history right now but our teacher won't be there all week, I bet the substitute won't even realize I'm gone. Really, I just wanted to talk to someone normal for a change. It's creeping me out, how everyone's treating me. Its always "_How is he?_" and "_I'm so sorry_" or the stuff I can't answer, like "_Is he gonna play football again?",_ "_Are they gonna give him that scholarship still?_", "_When's he getting out of the hospital?_". And I don't even know, and I don't feel like thinking about it all day long. I know they're just worried and I guess that's selfish -" she started to explain.

         The boy shook his head, adding, "No that's being honest."

          Lillian nodded and continued, "Yea well. I sit with him in his room and he's not in a lot of pain, I know that. But it looks... bad. And I know he's just trying to not make me worry. But I can't help it, because the doctors don't know anything. They don't know how long it's going to be before he can walk, before he can leave. And I don't know if its right but I don't want to think about that all the time, you know." As she finished her eyes were glassy and she searched over the tabletop.

         Tommy replied solemnly, "Yea." He did feel bad, what had happened to Brett, it could have happened to anyone out there on that field. But Brett was the one who took a hit wrong and fell on a bad spot and it was just horrible luck that no one deserved. There was a pause before he cracked to break the heaviness, "So, you girls really talk about me in the bathroom huh?"

         Lillian gave a wet laugh and looked up at him, smiling. "Oh yea. You're even on the wall of honor, you know. Some girl wrote 'Tommy is so fine!' on the wall. It's insane," she retorted sarcastically.

         "Really?" Tommy asked mock hopefully.

         She shook her head and admitted, "No."

         Tommy sighed and replied, "Its because I'm not confident enough huh?"

         Lillian leaned back, her arms stretched out to the table. "No, believe me, you are. You have confidence coming out the ass," she kidded.

         Tommy gave a lopsided grin and joked, "And it's a mighty fine ass, might I add."

         Lillian's eyes swelled and she exclaimed. "Wow, you just sounded so much like my brother it was freaky."

         Tommy feigned seriousness when he remarked, "Ok, I've got to stop that." 

         Lillian laughed and replied, "I know."

         Tommy glanced down and touched the empty sheet of paper in front of him. "I can't even think of how to begin," he wondered aloud.

         Resting her elbows on the table, Lillian nodded and responded, "That's always the difficult part. But once you start, it gets easier." But she was glancing at him when she said it, because it was true. She thought they'd never be back here again, be able to be friends, that too much had changed and they had as well. But it seemed as soon as they started with one word, it was all there again, all that had kept them as friends through the years. It had never left and this time they weren't fighting it because for the first time Lillian was realizing how much she missed and needed this. 

         Tommy looked up and smiled slightly. "Yea. It does," he said.

--

         Kimmi was coming from the school as the classes let out, students swarming around her. The day was perfect and crisp, a gilded sun scattering across the cement in bands. Kimmi was dressed in a zip up tan sweater over a dark brown tee shirt and jeans, her dark hair dropping to her shoulder blades. Another school day gone by and she had managed to go without seeing Phil once. Perfect. All last week it had been the same thing and when she did see him, she'd turn around and walk the other way without a word. It wasn't mean but it was avoiding him and the situation because she'd had about all she could take of him moving in whenever he wanted and then pulling back just as fast. She'd hung out with Natalie and Tommy and her brother and it was fine. It wasn't the same, there wasn't anyone to make her laugh or get her jokes or call an ass, but it would have to do. 

         She could see Chuckie's car in the distance and then suddenly she heard a recognizable voice call, "Kimmi!" 

         Kimmi sighed inwardly and continued walking, not even glancing back. She could hear his footsteps close when she replied flatly, "You're going to be late for practice."

         Phil followed her between cars, walking just a little quicker. He was wearing jeans and a tan sweater with two red stripes running along the chest. "Yea well they can wait a little. I have to talk to you," he told her. 

         Kimmi was glaring ahead, into the light glinting off windshields in bursts of white. "I heard what you did to Izaac, Phil," she countered.

         The boy shrugged as he continued after her. "He was asking for it," he responded.

         Kimmi rolled her eyes to no one in particular and retorted evenly, "Yea well I can handle things on my own, thanks." 

         Phil called with a little frustration, "I know. Look, will you just stop. I need to talk to you and usually that means, you know, you turn and listen." He reached out to grab her arm gently and stop her. 

         Kimmi whirled around, tossing off his hand. There was mounting anger flickering in her eyes when she quickly replied, "I'll save you the trouble, ok Phil. What happened was a mistake. You were drunk, you were desperate. These things happen. Got it ok. But I can't go back to the way things were, ok. Because I'm sick of this and maybe... Maybe it would be better if we just didn't talk for awhile." 

          Phil was serious for once, realizing the mistakes he'd made and how he'd really hurt Kimmi without even realizing it, as much as she tried to be strong and act like he hadn't. "No, wait.  I know what I've done to you was messed up and I never meant to hurt you ok," he started to say.

         Kimmi stared hard to the side, hair splaying into her eyes, and interrupted in a cold tone, "You didn't hurt me, I don't care what you do, Phil."

         She still had to act like she didn't care. Good, old stubborn Kimmi. She was almost as stubborn as him. He exclaimed with exasperation, "Will you just listen to me, Kimmi? I rehearsed this thing yesterday." She finally looked up at him, her eyes questioning. Phil went on, "I was trying to save our friendship but it was ruined anyway, ruined by me trying to deny what was happening between us. How I'm starting to really like you." Her face washed over with surprise and softened slightly, the sun now behind her and framing her outline. Phil continued nervously, "And I'm sorry. But I never wanted to loose you; I didn't think I could take that chance. I mean, who else would whoop my butt in basketball or keep me humble?" Kimmi laughed faintly at this, her eyes growing moist, even if she'd never thought she could be "_one of those girls_" who got all teary-eyed over something romantic. Phil smiled and then said, "Abbey dumped me because I couldn't go steady with her. One little word but I couldn't say it, it didn't feel right. We weren't even dating other people but I just couldn't because I knew, there was someone else. And it's you. For a long time now, it's been you."

         Kimmi was trying to hold back real tears now, a wind laced with frost swilling by. "Phil..." she breathed.

         Phil wasn't exactly sure what her reaction would be so he hurriedly added, "And we can go slow, I don't care. We don't even have to date right away if you don't want. I just hope you'll give me another chance. I'll try not to screw up too bad this time around." He grinned a little crookedly and Kimmi laughed. 

She couldn't think of anything to say so she moved foreword, leaning up to press her lips to his. He felt warm when all around her was a frosty chill and she clutched onto either side of him, two smiles melding together. She could feel his fingers on the hollow of her back and their shared breathes. Maybe this was better then any words. Kimmi pulled back and Phil was still holding onto her when he teased, "So, your house or mine?"

Kimmi laughed and pushed him off lightly, rolling her eyes. "Go to practice," she shot back.

He swung around and was heading back up to school when he turned, walking backwards. Phil called to her, "What? Just because we're dating now you think you can boss me around huh? Well you're right. See you, Kimmi."

Kimmi smiled in his direction and replied, "Bye, Phil." She walked towards her brother's car far off by the last row of automobiles, she could see vaguely Chuckie looking annoyed at how long she'd made him wait. The sun splashed in gold puddles around her and the bracing air smelt of snuffed out matches. In the woods past the parking lot she could see the first few freckles of red, yellow, and burnt orange leaves. Autumn was here. 

--

**Closing Notes: **I'm not sure how many cups are in a Reeses so yea I could be wrong. Yuck, I hate Reeses!Well I hate peanut butter so there you go. Let's have a discussion about this. Ha ha, kidding. And now enough about me... 

The early beginning of the autumn season, the beginning of Kimmi and Phil together, the beginning of a friendship between Tommy and Lil, the beginning of a more confident Chuckie, and oh yea, the beginning of Natalie. I was getting a little sick of the same melodramatics that seemed to be the usual themes of the other chapters (i.e. Lil and Tommy fighting, Kimmi putting her feelings aside for Phil) and knew it was time for a little movement in the plot. So changes, changes! O yea and there was also a Phil/Tommy fight in there somewhere, which is sort of what you'd expect Phil to say, I mean he doesn't want to have to see Tommy be used by Lil. When Brett was hurt it sort of forced Lil into a mini-realization that when she needs to talk to someone, none of her so-called new friends are really there to listen or take her mind off things. It's Tommy who she ultimately goes to. I think their conversations pretty much explains why Tommy is so stuck on Lil, even after all she's done, they just work you know. I like writing them as more friends then yelling at each other, ha ha. As for her friends and who they think she should hang with (Meaning no one but them), well you'll just have to wait to find out! About Natalie, I'm not going to try and make her a main character or anything, its pretty much the same thing as Brett. I am trying to make her stand out a little in the way she dresses and how she speaks a little more maturely and has her own opinions. Ok, enough about her, lol. Chuckie is just a bit of a buzz at school. Did that ever happen in your school? Where suddenly you came back from summer vacation and some person was the talk of the school because "_they changed so much_"? And have you ever heard how girls will say confidence is a huge thing in a guy? I know I have heard that a lot and I guess it sort of is but I really don't think it's that big of a deal. Still girls are starting to notice Chuckie for the first time and well, it seems Angelica missed the boat. And yay, Phil and Kimmi are together!  Woo woo, what Tommy had to say to Phil actually sunk in, as well as what he figured out after dating Abbey and realizing she just wasn't Kimmi. 

Next up, the school Homecoming dance! I can't think of anything to say without giving up too much so I'm just gonna shut up. Not your typical "dance chapter" though I think. But you know me, I like to throw in some unexpected stuff! O yea, and the person who was wondering if Angelica and Chuckie "did it"? Nope, like I said, it was all innocent. I think that would have been a huge leap in their relationship if they did, I'd like to think Angelica wouldn't just sleep with someone and then the next day leave them. At least in my story, she's a _little_ better then that. Haa.    


	10. Chapter Ten: Bittersweet Homecomings

**Disclaimer: **Just the usual "yadda yadda yadda". Don't own **Rugrats**, wish I did. Then there'd be a "Rugrats: Later Years" with real teens, lol. O yea and this is back to PG-13. A few people were kind enough to say what I was thinking too, it's really not that bad to be R. I was just overly paranoid I'd get a flame or something for corrupting some poor kid, with all the underage drinking and stuff. But, hey, not much worse then what you'd see on any television show today so oh well.   
  
I forgot to mention last chapter, I did look up about the injuries Brett received. You do loose complete feeling in your leg at first when you have a crushed pelvis and it takes around 6 hours or more for all the surgeries. So hey, I do my research! Haa. As for the lyrics, I found the sappiest 80s rock song I could think of! It is a dance after all, its pretty funny to me too that there is a techno version of this song. 

Just wanted to add a quick message to **chuckangie **to return his – ok what are you doing reading this? Go write and add to that really great story, you wicked good writer you! =D

**Splintered Reflections**

By Heather [TinySweetHeart]   
  


  
**Chapter Ten: Bittersweet Homecomings**

I've been waiting for so long  
For something to arrive  
For love to come along  
  
Now our dreams are coming true  
Through the good times and the bad  
I'll be standing there by you  
  
And baby you're all that I want  
When you're lying here in my arms  
I'm finding it hard to believe  
We're in Heaven

-- "Heaven" -- Brian Adams --   
  


  
--   
  


White sunlight pressed in flickering patterns through the large shop windows, outside the downtown street stirred with afternoon activity. Phil and Tommy were at **Mr. Gardner's Suits**, the store almost every boy in school went to before a dance to grab something to wear. Kimmi was supposed to meet them there, to make sure Phil didn't pick something that would embarrass her, but apparently she was late. So now they were rummaging through racks and shelves, looking for a suit for the Homecoming Dance.   
  
Phil was browsing by the half-off hangers when he yanked one out. "What do you think about this?" he joked, holding up a pale blue jacket and pant set. Phil was dressed in a black coat over a gray shirt and jeans.   
  
Tommy looked over and cringed. He replied, "I don't think powder blue is your color... Or your decade, Phil. My dad wore a suit like that, when he was in high school." He was wearing a dark brown jacket and an olive green shirt underneath with jeans   
  
Phil nodded, grinning. "See, even better! It's vintage. It's a classic," he exclaimed and maybe he wasn't being sarcastic now, which was scary in itself.   
  
Tommy continued flipping through the racks when he responded, "Kimmi wouldn't let you wear that."   
  
"What do you think I am? Whipped?" Phil scoffed back.   
  
Tommy paused to give Phil a deadpan stare and retort, "Yes."  
  
Sighing, Phil shrugged and pushed the suit back on its place with all the other eyesores. "Ok. Maybe just a little," he admitted.   
  
Tommy laughed and went on searching. He didn't actually care what he got, he would have worn the same suits he had in middle school if he hadn't grown out of them. He didn't even have a date yet and he didn't care, it didn't bother him to go alone for a change, without the worry of all the extra things that came along with a date. He had been meaning to ask something so he stated casually, "So you guys are dating huh?" This was the first time they'd really hung out since, well, "_the fight_". They had never argued like that before, it made him feel like they were a couple of girls or something. It didn't take them that long to get back to normal after anyway, in the back of their minds they both knew it was stupid in the first place so they did the typical guy thing and acted like nothing had happened.   
  
Phil shot an exasperated look and he replied, "Where are you getting your information from? Loose Lips Chuckie Finster? We aren't anyway, not yet. We're just going to the dance. Kimmi doesn't want to rush into anything. I think she's worried I'll screw something up again."   
  
Tommy grinned and added, "Good thinking."   
  
Phil nodded, looking down at some ties before going on, "Yea you're right. I've been screwing a lot up lately. Look, what I said to you at your house, man, I didn't mean it."   
  
Tommy just shook his head, saying, "It's ok, really."   
  
The boy stared straight ahead at him now over the racks and countered, "No. No, Tommy. For once let me cover for my own big mouth." Tommy laughed at this and Phil smirked slightly. Then he continued, "I know you don't need me butting in like some nosy girl. And you're right, even if I've been mad at her I should be willing to let that go if she is, I mean we use to all be so close. I'm just letting my own stupid stubbornness get in the way. Lillian did need someone, and you were there when it really shoulda been her brother. So thanks."   
  
Tommy shrugged and replied sincerely, "Yea well, no problem."   
  
Suddenly Phil spotted another suit and snatched it out as well. "O man! I think I've found the one," he exclaimed.   
  
Tommy glanced over at the jacket and pants set and declared obviously, "It's purple."   
  
Phil shook his head, looking it over. "Its lavender really," he said humorously.   
  
Tommy cocked an eyebrow and retorted, "No, what it really is, is ugly. Besides, I don't think Kimmi is wearing a purple dress. Is she? What color dress is she wearing?"   
  
          Shoving the hanger back on the rack, he sighed, "I don't know. I think she told me on the phone, I just wasn't paying attention."   
  


          Tommy's eyes swelled in surprise as he countered with a laugh, "Phone? You guys talk on the phone?" 

          Groaning, Phil exclaimed, "For hours! It's killing me! I would have never figured Kimmi for the phone conversation kind of girl, but nope she is. She talks about sports and cool stuff like that, but still. Talking. For hours." Turning to slide another hanger back on the rack, he shrugged and added, "So I admit, I'll just tune her out while I play video games."

  
          Just then the little bell above the door jangled and a rush of air spluttered out. "Hey, you guys!" a voice called and the two boys looked over to see a pair of girls entering. Kimmi was dressed in a white puffer jacket and faded jeans with sneakers, her hair brushing past her shoulders. She smiled at her friends, the light from the large picture windows making long designs along her face.

          Phil immediately threw up his hands and gave an exaggerated smile. "Hey, the most wonderful, beautiful, funny girl in the world!" he exclaimed guiltily, knowing if she had heard the last of what he had been saying she would have killed him.

          Kimmi arched an eyebrow and shifted her gaze from Phil to Tommy and back again, questioning jokingly, "Right. Ok, what did he do wrong?" Tommy laughed and then he casually glanced at the girl who came to stand beside Kimmi. Natalie was dressed in a light blue peacoat and black pants with a thick white wool sweater underneath, her dark hair spilling down her back. Kimmi raised a hand to point at her friend and added, "Oh I hope you don't mind, I brought Nat along. We were both starving so we're gonna grab food later, you guys are welcome to join us."

          Phil shrugged and replied, "Sure, I'm always hungry."

          Natalie did a small awkward wave and smiled nervously. "Hey Tommy," she greeted. 

          Tommy looked a little surprised but grinned back and responded, "Hey."

          Then the pale eyed girl glanced down at Tommy's hands and teased, referring to a past running joke, "I see you skipped the nail polish today."         
  


          He nodded and said in a deadpan tone, "O yea, well you know, it chips." Then Tommy shot Phil a look and interjected, "Hey Phil, can you check something out with me for a second?"

          Phil knitted his brow together and commented, "Umm sure, buddy. But, you know, we're not chicks, we don't have to do everything together." 

          Tommy didn't reply as he started walking to the opposite wall of the store, distancing them from the girls who began looking over some suits and giggling about how ridiculous a few were. Finally far enough away he turned to act like he was looking at a rack and accused, "Is this a set up?"

          Phil didn't even bother to look busy, jamming his hands in his pockets and giving him a skeptical expression. "Well no, I don't think so, I believe its just hamburgers and fries, not a sting operation last I checked. And don't get your panties in a twist, grandma," he snorted.

          The darker haired boy nodded and explained, "No, I know it's not a big deal. I just... I mean, I hope Kimmi's not trying to hook us up."        

          Phil laughed and shook his head. "Kimmi? She doesn't have a matchmaker bone in her body. But what's so wrong with that? Natalie seems nice enough, she's pretty. What, is she a psycho? Because that whole nail polish thing, creepy," he said.

          Tommy was still pretending to look down at some shirts and he replied, "That's just an inside joke. I guess she's cool. I don't know." Really, why was he getting all nervous over this anyway? What was so horrible about the idea? Natalie seemed really nice and she was beautiful, so what was his problem? He hadn't had a girlfriend since... Since the end of middle school, that lasted all of a few months, and there were no other girls he was interested in right now right? So why **not **Natalie?         

          Phil shrugged a second time and suggested, "Well, invite her to the dance then. You're not going with anyone and either is she. It's just a dance."

          Tommy nodded slowly, remarking, "Yea. How do you know she's not going with anyone..." Then his eyes swelled with realization and he exclaimed, "This is a set up!"

          Phil smiled knowingly and then raised his hands in a gesture of innocents before walking off, back towards the girls. Tommy followed, silently cursing his sneaky friends. 

          Phil went over to join Kimmi as she scrutinized a few suits on hangers. He came to her side and she was holding out a black jacket and a crimson shirt. "Phil, what do you think about this suit and shirt?" she asked.

          Phil merely replied uninterested, "Yea, it's nice."

          The short girl nodded and went on, "Well, I mean, it matches my dress exactly. But if you don't like it –"

          Phil's eyes perked wide and he exclaimed, "No! It's great, I love it. I'm going to try it on." He then headed over to the dressing room where they could have it tailored too, suit and shirt in tow, and thanking his lucky stars he was able to avoid Kimmi finding out he really had forgotten the color of her dress. That just had "not good boyfriend material" written all over it.

          Natalie was over at a line of shelves, all brimming with folded pants. Tommy went over by her as she browsed to kill time. "God, dances,"  
 she groaned to herself, fingering her purse.

          Tommy smiled slightly and asked, "What? Not big on them?"

          The girl shook her head, replying, "Not exactly. Getting all dressed up to sip punch and watch kids practically dry hump on the dance floor, not my idea of fun. But maybe this school is different."

          Tommy sighed and joked, "No, not really." Natalie laughed at this and then nervously tried to act like she was looking through the pants again. Tommy did as well, warm strands of light drifting over them. The silence passed before Tommy, smiling to himself, thought out loud, "At one dance in middle school, I thought I was so cool with all these dance moves and I fell on my face in front of everyone."

          Natalie looked over and raised an eyebrow. "I think I can do better. At our last dance I came out of the bathroom and didn't realize the back of my dress was tucked into my pantyhose. Yea, I walked around like that for probably a half an hour before anyone told me," she admitted.

          Tommy chuckled and then went on, "Wow. Still, I can top that. Before our Valentine's Dance I was feeling really sick but I couldn't cancel on my date. So we went to pick her up and she was putting the bootinear on me and she ended up stabbing me. There was a lot of blood and well, I musta been really woozy or something because when I looked at the blood... Well, I passed out." Natalie giggled at this and Tommy continued, "Yea, and when I came to it was after a half hour and she'd left."

          Natalie mock winced and retorted, "Ouch." Then glancing at Tommy, she informed, "I have you easily beat though. My date for our winter formal, didn't show up. At all."

          Tommy's eyes swelled and he shook his head, commenting, "Man."

          Natalie just shrugged and looked down, replying, "I know, but he was a jackass. He was kicked out of school like a month later. I always pick the wrong guys; I bet that's why I hate dances."

          Tommy shoved his hands in his pockets absently and admitted, "Yea. I mean, dances aren't all bad. They can be sorta cool and anyway, it's funny to make fun of those guys who think they can dance. You know, they bring the glow sticks and everything."

          Natalie laughed and chimed in, "Yea or the girls who take Homecoming Queen so seriously."

          Wow, it was really easy to talk to her; it felt like they had known each other for awhile at least. She made him actually laugh. Staring down the dark haired boy awkwardly began to say, "So, I mean since you're not going with anyone and either am I, if you want, we could go together."

          When he chanced a look up, Natalie was smiling and biting her lip. "Ok. We'll keep each other from getting bored. I don't have a dress yet so whatever suit you get, I'll just buy a dress to match that," she said and tried to sound less excited then she was.

           Tommy nodded and swallowed down a little anxiety, replying, "Yea, ok. Cool." 

--

                      
          "Note to self – detention really sucks, try not to get it next time," Chuckie sighed to himself as he crossed over the cement parking lot, a white sun pressing into a crisp blue sky overhead. There weren't many students around since school had been over an hour ago. He was dressed in jeans and a dark blue stripped zip up sweatshirt, his scarlet hair as messy as usual. 

          He slid his key into the car door and sat down, when he heard someone shout, "Hey, Finster! Do you think I can catch a ride?" He glanced into his car's side mirror to see a blonde girl running towards him in a cheering uniform, curls careening up and down. He slumped farther back into his seat and groaned, why did bad things always seem to happen at once? 

          "Uh why don't you ask one of your groupies?" he shot when he heard her footsteps nearing closer.

          Angelica stiffened and propped her pom poms at either hip. "Well fine, if that's how you're gonna be, I will," she sniffed and swiveled around on her sneakers, strutting off back the way she came.

          Chuckie sighed a second time and slammed his car door hard to vent some frustration. Then he called after her through his open window, "Alright, Angelica. Hop in."

          She swung around and smiled knowingly. "Well if you insist," she commented as she went around the car and opened the door, positioning herself in the passenger seat and buckling up. She didn't even want to question why she had asked him for a ride, she knew the reason and it disgusted her, it really did. But there was also nothing she could do about it and she settled into the chair, adjusting her pom poms and her skirt hem, anything to stop thinking about her reasons.

          As the engine hummed to life and they started out of the parking lot, Chuckie questioned, "So what's wrong with your car?"

           The girl released an aggravated breath and huffed, "Its back at the garage, they can't figure out what's wrong with it. I told daddy not to have high school dropouts fixing my car but does he listen? No."

           Chuckie mockingly nodded and retorted, "Right, that's what the three-dollar an hour hired help are for. You need to get a car like mine, it hasn't broken down in the time I've had this baby. It's a classic." He patted the dashboard to emphasize this.

          Angelica crinkled her nose and said, "The last time this hunk was considered a classic was in 1989. Now the term is just 'junk', Finster."

          Chuckie raised his eyebrows indignantly and exclaimed, "Don't insult Bessy! She can hear you."   

          She shook her head and went on to complain, gesturing out the window with a hand, "No wonder this thing hasn't broken down. What do you have in there? A lawnmower motor? We're going thirty-five in a forty-five!"

          Chuckie kept his eyes out towards the road ahead and objected, "No, we're going thirty-five in a thirty-five, thank you. I'd like to keep my police record spotless ok."

          Angelica's eyes widened and she exclaimed, "You go the speed limit? Who goes the speed limit? My grandma in her wheelchair, that's who. Anyway I don't think you have to worry about breaking any laws there, led foot. It's not like the Chess club will be throwing any raging keggers anytime soon."

          Chuckie smiled slightly and joked, "Then you obviously aren't a member. Our pizza party last week got kinda outta control; I drank way too much Snapple and made an illegal move with my Knight."

          The girl laughed and grinned in spite of herself. "You're such a geek, Finster. But a funny one," she said softly, shaking her head.

          Chuckie was genuinely surprised when he replied, "Well thanks. Wow, was that a compliment? Hold on, I think I need to pull over, I'm in shock."

          Angelica rolled her eyes and insisted, "It was **not** a compliment. It was a nicely put insult." There was a formidable silence that slid around them as they continued down the road, thatches of shade and light passing in patterns over Angelica's face as she gazed out the window. "The trees look so pretty, I can't believe its fall already," she finally commented wistfully.

          Chuckie nodded and sighed. "Me either. It feels like summer went by too quick. Did you have a good summer?" he questioned. Wait a minute, was he actually having a real, normal conversation with Angelica? Angelica Pickles? One that didn't involve "screw you" every other word? Well, wow, who knew?

          Angelica shrugged and stared ahead. "Uh, I guess. Same as usual. Sleeping late, going to the beach and parties, shopping. Pretty boring actually. You?" she responded distractedly.

          Chuckie retorted, "If you think that's boring my summer would seem like a coma to you. I worked at my part-time job to save up for Bessy and I uh, caught up on a lot of television."

          The blonde cocked her eyebrows and quipped, "You're right. I almost went into a coma just listening to the lameness."

          Just when you thought she was semi-human, she had to go and burst your bubble. Chuckie turned the wheel sharply, bringing the car over the line that separated the road from the curb just slightly. "Ok, trips over, Princess. Say hello to the curb for me," he responded sarcastically.

          Angelica reflexively clutched at the dashboard and squeaked, "Finster! You would not leave me stranded!"

          Chuckie turned the wheel back towards the road and they coasted to their normal direction as he teased, "I wouldn't? Ok I wouldn't. But that's only because I need you if Bessy broke down, one person can't push a car after all."

          Angelica smiled slightly and folded her arms over her chest. "Whatever, Finster. Just admit you enjoy my company already," she retorted.

          Looking ahead, at the asphalt, he stated, "Admit you enjoy mine." 

          There was that awkward quiet again that broke over them and the trees stretched by in a blur of colors. Angelica's gaze softened a little and grew distant, she knew it was true. Finally they came to Angelica's neighborhood and the girl interjected, "This is me. So uh, thanks for the ride, Finster."

          Chuckie nodded and replied, "No problem."

          Angelica pressed down on the latch and stood to her feet, adjusting her skirt. Looking back, she started to say, "You want to... You want to come in for a second?"

          Chuckie's brow shot up and he exclaimed, dully stunned, "Come in? You mean, to your house?"

          Angelica gave him a flat stare and snapped, "No the garage. Of course my house, Finster. Just for a drink or something, it's the least I owe you."

          Chuckie nodded and responded, " Ok. Sure." Then he pulled the keys from his Bessy and got out of his car. He followed Angelica up the brick walkway to her house and stood behind as she jammed a key into her door. He could hear the muffled yaps of some kind of dog and then he entered her house behind Angelica. A fuzzy standard poodle came hurling at him, jumping at his legs and barking. Chuckie held his hands up helplessly. 

          Angelica started up her stairs and called over her shoulder, "I'll be right back, I'm going to change out of my uniform. Ignore the dog, she gets excited when there's new people."

           Chuckie nodded to himself and chanced to reach a hand down. The white dog made a low growl and glared up at him. Chuckie instantly retracted his hand and shouted, "Uh, your dog's... Uh growling at me. I think it's going to attack me."

          He heard Angelica opening and closing drawers and she called out mockingly, "O right, Finster. My poodle is going to attack you. Just pet her or something, make friends. You know, be a man or whatever."

           Chuckie nodded a second time to convince himself and soothed in what he hoped was a caring voice, "Ok. Nice doggy, good dog." He tried again to reach down and this time the poodle lunged for his hand, barely missing his skin. Chuckie yanked back his arm and exclaimed, "Woah, bad dog! I think I'm going to need my fingers!"

          Angelica came down the stairs now, dressed in light blue track pants and a white baby tee shirt. She rolled her eyes at Chuckie and said, "Princess, come here. Leave the big scaredy cat alone." The poodle instantly wagged its tail and pranced to its owner excitedly, licking at her. 

           Ok, it must hate guys. Or red heads. Or... just Chuckie. Chuckie followed Angelica as she waltzed into her living room, plopping onto a white leather sofa. He sat down near her, the poodle nudging its plump body between them. "So you stay all alone after school huh?" he questioned as he started to glance around. It was a pretty huge house with high ceilings and wood flooring, everything was very fashionably decorated. There was a big flat screened television in the room, as well as some pictures in frames along a fireplace mantel. There were many of a little girl in curly pig-tails, smiling and doing her poses in her numerous different outfits. He remembered that girl.

          Angelica nodded and responded matter of factly, "Oh yea. My parents don't get home until around eight. I don't care, they leave me money for food and stuff. I have Princess here to protect me too." She ran a hand through her dog's fur and the poodle made a little whimpering noise.

          Chuckie was still glancing around when he asked, "You want me to stay awhile?"

          The girl narrowed her eyes indignantly and exclaimed, "What? Do you think I need you or something? I am perfectly fine on my own, Finster. Despite what you might think, I am very capable of taking care of myself!"

          Chuckie shook his head and raised his hands in defense. "Alright, alright. Jeesh. I think I'd rather take my chances with Princess then with you," he commented.

          Angelica calmed down a little but still snorted, "You don't have any chance with me, Finster." 

          Chuckie gave her a deadpan stare and said, "You know what I meant."  
  


            
          The blonde nodded and retorted, "Scarily, I did. I'm starting to understand Geek Speak, someone shoot me."

          Chuckie raised a hand in the air and joked, "I call dibs."

          Angelica was smiling faintly and rolled her eyes. "God, you're _so_ funny. You must be a hit on 'geometry study night' or whatever you nerds do for fun," she rebutted. 

          Chuckie nodded and folded his arms over his chest. "Ah, well, I don't like to brag," he said sarcastically.

          Angelica laughed slightly and then questioned, "So why'd you stay after school today? Want to get in some extra hours of school?"

          Chuckie grew a little more serious as he stared ahead and replied, "I had detention."

          Angelica's expression was awash with surprise and she spluttered, "Wait, wait. Detention? You had detention? Chuckie Finster?"

          Chuckie rolled his eyes and retorted sarcastically, "No, that new kid, Eye, from Poland. Of course me."

          Angelica's eyes were wide when she replied, "I'm shocked." She would never in a million years think Chuckie Finster, king of all geeks, would get detention. It just went to show you couldn't always peg everyone a certain way; they had a way of surprising you if you did.

          Chuckie nodded and glanced down. "Yea, I think my parents were too," he said.

          "What for?" Angelica asked after a little of the initial disbelief wore off.

          Chuckie grimaced and explained, "Mr. Crediant, I hate that guy. I simply pointed out the fact one of his test questions really was subjective and I get an hour worth of after-school detention. He's a Nazi."

           Angelica nodded and relinquished, "Wow, Finster. I stand corrected about the whole "never in trouble" thing. You're like some rebel now huh? What's next, a Mohawk and tattoo?"

           Chuckie grinned and shrugged. "I was born to be bad, babe," he replied, adding in the last part just because he knew it would really annoy her.

          The girl wrinkled her nose and gagged, " Ew. Babe?" Still meeting his gaze, she went on, "You've really changed though huh? You're like a new guy or something..." 

          Chuckie flushed slightly and shook his head of shaggy hair. Why were people saying that? He hadn't, he was still the same ol' Chuckie Finster. Just with a little more backbone maybe. "What? No. I'm still a nerdo, just one who had an hour detention," he replied in embarrassment.

            Angelica turned to look straight ahead and say with the air of nonchalant, probably to make her point further that he really had changed, "So, you're going to the dance with Hillary huh?"

           Chuckie shrugged and replied, "Oh yea. I guess. She asked me and she seems really nice anyway."

          Angelica nodded to herself and sniffed back passive-aggressive, "I guess. If you like airheads I mean."

          Chuckie just laughed, he wasn't going to take Angelica's opinion on someone serious anyway, and joked, "Guess I do then. How about you? Who's the lucky victim?"

          Angelica sighed slightly and gazed ahead. "Some guy I met through my friends. He goes to Susie's private school; I guess he's rich or something," she responded absently.

          Chuckie didn't want to care so much but he did. He cared she had to come home to an empty house every day and he cared she was going to the dance with some snobby stupid loser. But he did his best to swallow those feelings down because he had already been crushed twice by her, he didn't want to make it three strikes. "Oh well he's rich, that's all that matters. Glad to see you aren't superficial or anything," he commented.

          Angelica rolled her eyes at him and remarked, "Look who's talking, Mr. I-Like-The-Bubbly-Girls. At least he has half a brain. Not a lot, but half. I don't care anyway, I hate dances." 

          Chuckie nodded and sarcastically replied, "Oh yea sure you do." Girls like Angelica lived for dances, he knew that.

          Angelica glanced down at the glossy flooring and the white lines of light that splashed across it through the tall windows. She was still petting her dog when she insisted sort of disappointed, "No I do. I mean, get all dressed up only to spend the night comforting a crying friend in the bathroom and listening to my drunk date babble on before passing out on the dance floor. It's always the same story, always lame. Don't tell anyone though ok. I just... Don't want that getting out ok."

           Chuckie nodded slowly and replied, "I wouldn't tell anyone." He was starting to realize Angelica's life was a lot less sparkly and perfect then she let on, and she was as well. 

          Angelica slid up to her feet with a sigh and ran her hands down her pants to press out any wrinkles. "You want popcorn?" she questioned as she started to head for her kitchen.

          "Sure," Chuckie replied and then picked up the remote sitting on the coffee table, flicking on the wide TV. He started to flip through some channels and then smiled when a loud, rock music video came up. "O hey, you get MTV2! Nice," he said.

          "I don't want to watch that! In your car that may be your radio, but in this house that is my TV!" she shouted from within her kitchen.

          Chuckie just rolled his eyes to himself and resumed flipping the channels, hoping for something good and not a "**Clueless**" rerun. Then smirking slightly, he yelled to her, "Extra butter, _sweetie_!"  
 

          He heard an aluminum bowl clatter to a tiled floor and a very miffed Angelica shriek back, "Sweetie! I'll shove your 'sweetie' right up your -"

           Slouching into the couch further, Chuckie interrupted, "Thanks, pumpkin!"

          Angelica yelled in anger, "Finster! Unless you want a lap full of popcorn I'd suggest you can it!"

           Chuckie shook his head and snickered to himself. "Alright, alright. Jeeze," he finally replied in a defeated tone. The TV settled on HBO and another bloody episode of "**The Sopranos**". Chuckie glanced over at a resting Princess and commented under his breath as if the dog could hear him, referring to Angelica, "Now I see where you get it from."

--   
  


          The gym actually looked pretty decent for once. The lights were dimmed and streamers hung from walls and rafters. Confetti speckled the ground in shimmering paper designs and balloons all littered the ceiling from where some dumb joker had thought it would be funny to untie them all from the back of everyone's chair. There were a few tables set up for personal belongings and a punch bowl that was guarded by some observant teachers so that there would be no spiking this time around. Loud music blared from a DJ booth, all vintage stuff as usual since their school had had the same forty year old man playing at every dance for ten years. 

          Phil and Kimmi were heading back from the voting table where they had each written a name down for Homecoming king and queen. Kimmi looked really beautiful and actually pretty "girly" in her red strapless dress over her petite form, that hit just above the knee, and red heels. Her dark hair was drawn back in a French twist that her mother had managed to do for her, after many hours of painful stabbings with bobby pins. Phil for his part appeared pretty pulled-together in his black suit and red shirt. They made a very striking couple, to both of their surprise. 

          Walking together, Kimmi glanced over at Phil and admitted, "I voted for you."

           With a small smile, Phil replied, "I voted for you."

          Kimmi questioned, already knowing the answer, "You think we'll win?"  
  


          Phil replied without a pause, "No."

          Kimmi laughed and nodded, adjusting her rose corsage. "Me either. We're not exactly the poster perfect couple. If we come in dead last I'll be surprised," she admitted.

          Phil shrugged. "Oh well, at least that's one less vote for the cheesy popular people. Just one though because I'm, well, really crazy popular," he kidded, smiling as she laughed at him.

           "And cheesy," Kimmi added.

          They stopped now, a dance floor of couples all swaying to some sappy love song from the 80s. "Hey, did I tell you you look really pretty in that dress?" he asked, glancing at her sincerely. Why was he so nervous? He shouldn't be, it was Kimmi, still he didn't want to make any mistakes, this was still like a 'trial' period anyway.

          Kimmi nodded and teased, "Uh yea, I _think_ that's what you were saying when you picked me up. I think you actually said I was "p-p-pretty"."

          Phil blushed slightly and scratched at the back of his neck where the collar ended. "Hey, just because I stutter when I'm nervous doesn't mean you can pick on me. You're not supposed to make fun of people with speech impediments ok," he replied mock indignantly.

          Kimmi laughed and thought out loud, "You're never nervous."

          Phil said, "I know." Then glancing back at all the people dancing, he questioned, "So, you wanna dance?"

          Kimmi smiled and replied, "Sure. We should, I mean we'd look a little strange just standing here, swaying." He took her hand and they headed to the middle of the floor. Phil wrapped his arms around her waist, his fingers resting on the hollow of her back, and she lifted her hands to his neck. It felt strange, after all they had been friends for so many years, and yet comfortable all at the same time. She should have been anxious but she wasn't, it was Phil and he made her feel at ease always. They slowly began to circle together and Kimmi could feel his breath lingering on the back of her bare neck. 

          After a slight pause, Phil questioned, "So is that corsage ok? Because my mom got it, I told her to get a bouquet but she thinks it's the 1950s and girls still like corsages."

          What was going on with him lately? It was like everything he did around her he had to second guess; she didn't want him to feel like that, like she was always judging what he did. But she told herself it was nothing, it was just because everything was so new and strange all of a sudden. Still she smiled softly and responded, "No, I like it Phil. I really really like it."

          There was a stretch of silence again as the rock song went on and the DJ thought it was brilliant of him to have only blue lights on so everyone was soaked in a pale light, like they were drifting at the bottom of a swimming pool. Finally Phil chuckled and said into Kimmi's ear, "Ok, let's make a wager. I bet you ten bucks they play all music not popular since 1980." 

          Kimmi laughed at this and challenged, "You're on. 1985 at least." The silence fell over them and Kimmi started smiling faintly as she remembered something. "You look p-p-pretty good yourself you know. It's weird seeing you in a suit. I think the last time was when it was my seventh birthday party," she mused.

          Recalling that memory, Phil grinned and exclaimed, "I remember that! It was at that yacht club."

          Kimmi rolled her eyes and sighed, "Yea, I was forced to. My mom wanted something formal so she could take pictures of me in a dress since I never wore one. God, it was sea foam colored and puffy. I hated that dress." 

          Phil laughed and shook his head slightly. "We spent the whole time under the stairs, eating cake and hiding from the adults," he replied.

          Kimmi smiled as well and stated, "Yea. That wasn't so bad." It really wasn't, it never was when he was around. The music swelled into some ridiculously long guitar solo and the DJ switched the strobe lights to a mixture of colors, a rainbow splotching the floor. They continued to dance, occasionally laughing over some couple who were taking this whole thing way too seriously.

--    
  
  


          "So Megan was all like "I love that purse!" And I was like "O my God, you do? It was half off!" Isn't that great? I mean, there are hardly any sales any more in the mall. It was such a good find," Hillary rambled on, using her hands for emphasis. Her long chestnut curls were pulled up in a bun style and she was dressed in a dark navy spaghetti strap dress. 

          Chuckie sat by her on some chairs, they'd decided to take a break from dancing because Chuckie figured maybe then he'd have a chance of escaping. He slouched into his seat and nodded distractedly, hoping for a dancer to careen out of control and knock him in the eye with an elbow so he could go to the emergency room and leave. "Yea, uh hu. That's great," he mumbled. He was wearing a black suit with a navy blue shirt underneath, although his hair was unstyled and wild.  

          Finally catching her breath, she grinned wide and stated, "So anyway, that's how I found my purse!" Then she gasped and held a hand to her lips, exclaiming, "O my God, I did it again didn't I? I rambled! O my God, I'm so embarrassed."  
  


          Chuckie forced on a smile and shook his head. "No, it's ok, really -" he started to reply.

           Hillary interrupted, "Megan is always saying I ramble but I don't know. Like, she does too. In fact all my friends do, they'll sit on the phone for hours and hours and hours and hours and hours. And o yea, last night guess what I heard? Tim is dating Laurence! I know, I couldn't believe it either. Tim and Laurence? Well whatever, it's not my business. But didn't she have a drug problem? That's what I heard; she was a total pothead -"   
  


          Chuckie suddenly stated, "Drinks! You want drinks? I'm thirsty. I'll grab you a Coke ok." 

          Hillary paused mid sentence and smiled. "Oh. Ok, sure. Thanks," she said. 

          Chuckie stood and started to walk away, sighing to himself as he did. Hillary made sure he was turned away from her when she pulled a compact from her purse and began to powder her face. As Chuckie headed over to the table that had on it a few plastic cups of soda the teachers had already poured for students, he noticed there was a slight scene. Some teenagers had stopped dancing or whatever they were doing to watch and gather. A boy Chuckie could not recognize was pointing his finger at one of the male teachers and blurting drunkenly, "No, buddy, _you_ have the problem! Not me!"

          The teacher shook his head and replied tiredly, "Just leave, son." Then he looked over to the boy's date and told her, "Angelica, take this young man home before I have to call his parents."   

          So it was Angelica's date. Chuckie looked to the girl and she had a stoic expression on, nodding. Her flaxen hair was straight and pulled half back; she looked really beautiful in a pink layered halter dress that reached mid thigh. "Come on, Greg. Stop acting like an idiot," she snapped.

           Greg shrugged and staggered, turning around. "Whatever. This dance sucks anyway. Sucks! You hear me, you all suck! Suck!" he trumpeted.   
  
  
          Angelica rolled her eyes and came to the boy's side as he stumbled, holding him up under his arm. "Oh just shut up," she sighed, helping him into the dim corridor.

          Chuckie followed the pair, wanting to help her. "Angelica..." he began to say after her.

          The girl glanced back and her ocean eyes looked regretful as she spotted Chuckie. She turned her head and let Greg lean on her as she helped him towards the double doors. An ashen moon reflected in the glass and parted over the hallway in metal ribbons. Angelica pushed past the doors and cool air swam around her. 

          Chuckie passed through the doorway and called, "Angelica! You want help or something? At least with getting him to the car?"

          Angelica looked back again and responded solemnly, "No, its fine, Chuckie." Right after she said this, Greg hunkered over, his hands at his knees, and starting throwing up at the curb. Angelica turned around and sighed audibly, folding her arms over her chest. "Great. Just great. Just give me the keys, you drunk fool, and you better hope there is not one drop of anything on this dress or I'll personally kill you myself," she fumed but she didn't sound as spirited as usual. She sounded defeated. 

          Chuckie approached and questioned, "You sure?" He could feel a knot in his stomach, he'd never seen her like this, so... alone. 

          She had been reaching over to grab the keys from her date's pocket and looked up then, the pallor light rolling over the curves of her face. Angelica responded bluntly, "It's not the first time." Then she turned and linked an arm around Greg's at the elbow, trying to get him to stand up straight. She helped him stumble along down the parking lot, away from the school and the throbbing dance.

-- 

          "Well, apparently "we suck"," Natalie observed, taking a sip of her soda. She and Tommy had headed over for a drink and rest after a fast song had started up and had been witness to Angelica's drunk date being thrown out. Natalie was adorned in a shimmery pale blue, thin strapped dress with ruching on the sides, her black hair pulled back in a low ponytail and dangling crystal earrings completing the outfit. 

  
          Tommy shrugged and grinned, adding, "Hmmm, guess so. Glad someone told me or else I'd just keep on going, thinking I didn't suck." He looked handsome in his dark suit and blue shirt.  
  


           Natalie nodded in agreement and remarked in a deadpan tone, "I know huh. Well someone was thrown out for being drunk; this dance is officially just like every other dance I've been to. But the plus side is they have pretty streamers." 

          Tommy looked up and laughed, saying, "Huh, they do." The DJ started playing a slower song and the pair tossed their cups in the trash bin and headed towards the left side of the dance floor. As they did, they spotted a familiar looking couple and Tommy led the way, calling, "Oh hey, Phil, Kimmi. What's going on?"

          Phil and Kimmi were slow dancing on the outskirts of the floor now and looked over at their approaching friend. Phil unwound his arms from around Kimmi to give Tommy a sort of high five and grin. He exclaimed, "Nothing! I'm glad to see you guys; we were getting a little bored by ourselves."

          Natalie rolled her indigo eyes and commented sarcastically, "Oh yea you guys look _so_ bored. You're just another one of those annoyingly cute couples already, admit it."

          Kimmi cringed at the idea and spluttered, "God, don't say that! The minute we start looking into each other's eyes longingly and singing the words to each other, _then_ you can slap me ok."   
          

           They all laughed at this and then Tommy questioned, "Have you seen Chuckie and his date?"

          Phil nodded and replied, "Yea, for barely two minutes. That's all we could take of that Hillary girl, she has more air in her head then a balloon."

          Kimmi groaned and added, "Yea, there is only so long you can fake smile and nod before it grows painful. So we said we were getting drinks and never came back. If Chuckie asks, we're dead ok. Double homicide."

           Tommy chuckled and said, "Sure thing." He realized the people all around them were dancing in couples and looked over at Natalie, holding out a hand. "You wanna dance, Nat?" he asked. 

          The girl smiled and nodded, taking his hand. "O yea, sure. They don't call these things a 'dance' for nothing I guess," she commented. Tommy led her to an area where it was a little more open and linked his arms around her. Natalie slipped hers around his neck and leaned in, still they held a little distance apart. The girl flushed faintly and looked down before meeting Tommy's eyes and stating, "So this might be the first dance I actually don't regret going to."

          Tommy grinned and replied, "Me too." He was having a great time, she was funny and beautiful and nice. Perfect. 

          They were circling and the couples parted a little so there was a partial fracture of an opening and he saw her. Sitting alone on some chairs by a table, shadows edging over her face. There was that reflexive part in him again that made him want to go to her and he said, still looking at her, "I'll be... I'll be right back ok. I have to go see a friend." 

          Natalie seemed a little surprised but nodded and responded, "O sure." She felt his arms slip away from her and he turned, walking off. Then she shouted after him, half kidding, "You better not be ditching me!" 

          Tommy turned to give her a reassuring smile and wave, saying back, "I'm not! It'll take me a minute." Then he parted through the crowd and was lost from Natalie's sight. She made a soft sigh and glanced down at her heels.

          Lillian was sitting on the chair she'd remained in since she arrived at the dance, by her purse slumped on the table. It had been a struggle even to come tonight and now she knew she shouldn't have. Brett was still in the hospital; he had his second smaller surgery that day and would be there for probably the rest of the week, if not longer. She wasn't really in the dancing mood. Lillian hadn't even felt like getting her hair done, it was all down in light brown locks and pin straight; she was dressed in a simple stretchy dark brown halter dress over her slender frame and heels. When she walked in the doors, some of her friends who were not busy with their dates or dancing had said their hello's and then walked off, leaving her alone to sit here in thought. Darkness puddled around her and she wondered when her life had become so wrong.

          "So you have my fifty cents yet? You know, for the Reeses? You owe me, DeVille."

            She glanced up with questioned hazel eyes to see a familiar figure walking towards her. Smiling slightly, she replied, "Forgot. Next time, I swear."

          Tommy came to stand before her and ask, "You aren't here alone are you?"

          Lillian nodded gravely and said, "Afraid so. I'm officially pathetic I guess. I should warn you, standing near me might make you a loser too by association."

          The boy smiled and shrugged. "I'll risk it. So, you want to dance? I mean, seeing as how we're both losers and all," he questioned.

          Lillian shook her head and closed her eyes, fingering her little silver heart necklace that lay against her collar bone. "It's ok. I'm just going to wallow in my misery, thanks," she replied.

          "Well then we'll wallow together. We can just dance and wallow at the same time right? That's allowed," Tommy countered.

          She laughed and said, "I don't know."

          Tommy replied, "Wait, let me check the rulebook. O yea, it is. Come on." He lifted a hand out to her and smiled.

          Lillian sighed but took his offered hand anyway. Rolling her eyes, she stood and surrendered, saying, "Fine." She started to follow him out onto the dance floor and she could practically feel the eyes tracing their path. They reached a small clearing and Tommy paused, turning to her. He encircled his arms around her waist and Lillian went to rest hers around his neck. He felt warm; she'd almost forgotten how it felt to be held by him. Almost. "You look really nice," she breathed.

          His legs were entwined with her bare ones and he hated how excited he was just by having his arms around her. "You do too. We clean up well," he said with a smile.

          Lillian laughed quietly and nodded. "We do," she replied.

          The room was floating in blue light again, reflecting like the paper edges of waves. They were silent for a moment before Tommy interjected to break the seriousness, "Ok now Lillian, I know how tempted you might be to reach down and grab my butt, but please don't ok. I am sick of you always trying to cop a feel; I'm not your piece of meat."

          Lillian suppressed a laugh and nodded. "I'm sorry, Tommy. It's just so hard you know, but I'll do my best to resist," she said.

          Tommy responded mock seriously, "Ok that's all I ask."

          There was a break of quiet between them and then Lillian's face flashed with shock and amusement. Pointing over Tommy's shoulder, she chortled, "Oh whoa. Dry humping couple at twelve o'clock. I was _not_ prepared to see that."

          Tommy craned his neck to look back and laugh, turning around again. "O ok, me either. I guess they are just really happy to be together or something," he said of the grinding couple who were sloppily making out a few feet away.

          "I guess," Lillian replied, making an effort to avoid looking in that direction now. Then she added, "So, my brother and Kimmi huh?"

           Tommy nodded, wondering how she felt about that. "Yea. Your brother and Kimmi. Who would have thought it?" he remarked.

          The girl shrugged and replied, "Me actually. It was pretty obvious, for a long time. They acted like they didn't care about each other but you could tell. It was always right there. They just had to see it for themselves." And her words clung in the air with dual meaning. Lillian's eyes flickered over Tommy's face before looking off to the side.

          Tommy was watching her when he replied, "Yea."

          She forced out to change the topic, giving a strained smile, "So how did you do on that exploding moment? I didn't distract you too much did I?"

          Tommy shook his head and said, "Oh no. I did it on water pollution, I got an A."

          Lillian's face swelled with a genuine smile and she pressed her fingertips lightly into his back. "That's so great, Tommy. See, I knew you could do well if you just had a little faith. Much better then if you tried jamming your pencil in your eye anyway," she exclaimed.

           The boy laughed and nodded. "Yea, true," he admitted.

          They were silent again and Lillian's eyes caught around her at the faces of friends, who were looking her way with apparent ridicule and disdain. She knew they were whispering things to their dates. "You know what they're all saying don't you? _"Why is she dancing with some boy when her boyfriend is in the hospital?"_" she commented softly.

          Tommy was meeting her gaze when he replied, "I think they're saying, "Why is she dancing with him?"" 

          Lillian looked into his dark eyes and felt guilty for everything, all over again, for how she'd made him feel like he wasn't good enough, like he didn't... matter. She'd been too wrapped up in herself and her own life to even realize it, and she felt horrible now. She pulled herself in closer to him so there wasn't even a fraction of space, hugging onto him so their heads were side by side now. "I don't care what they're saying. I just don't care," she said sincerely.

          The music was drowning the world out and that blue light shimmered along the sparkles in girl's dresses, pooling around the room. One of Lillian's hands was at Tommy's neck, where the hair and skin met, and she didn't want to let go, she wanted to apologize for everything she'd done because everything she'd done lately was always so wrong. There was silence before Tommy started to say something he'd been considering for awhile, "Listen, Lillian, I've been thinking and I know before you said that we never noticed you, before everything -"

           Lillian wanted to make him stop; because she knew whatever he'd say would be so perfect and sweet, and it would make her feel even more awful. "I know, I was so wrong, Tommy. I don't know why I said that," she interrupted.

          Tommy shook his head and went on, "No, wait. I just wanted to say, I did. I noticed you. I always noticed you."

          Her eyes grew glassy with tears and she stung with guilt. He was too... _right,_ and she was always too wrong. He and her old friends were where she should be, not wherever the Hell she was now, with people who didn't even matter. "I know," she responded softly.

          The song drifted to an end and Lillian pulled away. Her eyes reflected wetly but she put on a smile anyway. "Alright, you need to go back to your date. I hijacked you for long enough," she remarked. 

          Tommy looked disappointed when he offered, "You sure? She wouldn't mind if you wanted to dance one more song -"

          Lillian tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and rambled slightly to cover up her sadness, "No, really, I'm fine. Besides, I'm missing my world among the loners and geeks. I feel strangely at home there. They may even make me their Queen, I'm keeping my fingers crossed."

          Tommy smiled slightly and replied, "Well ok if you're sure. See you later, Lillian."  
  


          She gave a small wave and said, "Bye, Tommy." She watched him turn and walk away, back through the clusters of people. She felt alone again and this time she knew she deserved it.

          He spotted Natalie near the side of the dance floor, watching the students with boredom. When she looked over and saw Tommy approaching, she smiled with relief and said, "I was starting to think you'd climbed out the bathroom window to escape or something."

           Tommy grinned back and replied, "Sorry, it took a little longer then I thought."

          Natalie shrugged and responded, "It's ok." Tommy slipped his hand into hers and they walked out towards the dance floor, weaving past people to find a good spot. Then Tommy and Natalie resumed dancing, a silence pressing down on them. Tommy was distractedly looking past her shoulder, through the crowd. He was trying to think about where he was and Natalie but his head kept moving elsewhere, somehow making him feel like he was in the wrong place and with the wrong person. Teens drifted out of the way and Tommy saw Lillian's seat was empty, her purse gone from where it had been on the table. 

          His gaze lingered there a little longer before he said, "  Hey, do you mind if I -"

          "Go again?" Natalie finished with a slight sad smile. "No, that's fine. I understand," she assured, although her voice was a little regretful.

          Tommy nodded and pulled away. "Great. Thanks. I'll be right back, I swear," he said and headed through the crowd, toward the gym twin doors. 

--

          A really cheesy rock ballad began to play, Brian Adams' "**Heaven**". Phil grinned and said into Kimmi's ear, "See, told you."

          By now they'd inched closer together so Kimmi was leaning against Phil, the shorter girl tilting her head up towards his. "Wow, you're right. Total 1980s. Do you think the DJ knows they released new music in the last decade or two?" she scoffed.

           Phil chuckled and replied, "DJ Dave? He's awesome. I don't think he owns a radio anymore, just eight tracks."

           Laughing, Kimmi nodded and reasoned, "That would explain it." They continued to move in slow floating circles and Kimmi commented, "Anyway this dance wasn't so bad."

            Phil replied matter-of-factly, "Relatively painless."

          Kimmi smiled up at him and couldn't help sniggering, "Yea, _Philly_." She knew using the name Abbey called him would really freak him out, but it was just too funny.

          Phil glanced down with worried dark eyes and objected, "Ok, don't call me that. It's creepy."

          Still smiling at him innocently, she said, "Sorry, couldn't resist."

          There was a silence as they slowly turned and the music winded on with its guitars and vocals. Phil was trying not to meet her eyes when he questioned, "So, what would you say to going out sometime?" There was too long of a pause for Phil's comfort so he added, smiling slightly, "Just, you know, a meal of food."

          Kimmi grinned and exclaimed, "**Old School**! I love that movie, Will Ferrell cracks me up."

          Phil clutched his fingers to her back and rolled his eyes, smiling. "Me too. But stop avoiding the question, Finster. Can we try this whole dating thing? I mean, I haven't even embarrassed myself or you yet at the dance. That has to count for something," he persuaded.

          Kimmi raised an eyebrow and chided, "True, DeVille, but the nights still young." Then she glanced off to the side, swimming in doubt, before replying, "I just... I'm worried... You might take it all back, later when you change your mind or something. And I'll be left looking like an idiot."

           She hardly ever talked about anything she was feeling, she was a lot like Phil in that way, and she would never mention she was frightened before. Phil held her a little closer and said, "That's not going to happen. You have to know that. I'm not going to take anything back, never again. So, can we give it a shot? See what happens from here? I promise I'm not so bad, I'm relatively painless."

           Kimmi laughed at this and then nodded. "Ok, sure, Phil. It's a date," she replied. 

-- 

          The wind was laced with a night chill and it scattered over the nearby soccer field. A swollen moon sank into the dark sky above, arcs of metal light falling over the small wooden playground. Lillian sat alone on a swing, staring down, lost in thought. At least here there was no one watching her every move, here she felt like she could clear her head. 

          "What? They moved the Tommy Fan Club meetings without even telling me? That's no way to treat your God, I have to say."

          Lillian lifted her head up to see the all too familiar figure lately of Tommy nearing over the grass. He had a way of showing up whenever she knew she wouldn't have wanted to see anyone but him. She smiled faintly and replied, "Yea. And sadly, I'm the president and only member."

          Tommy laughed and remarked, "I feel loved."

          Nodding the girl retorted, "You should."

          Tommy was close now and sat down in the swing by her, looking down. "So, you need to get fresh air or something? Because I have to tell you, there's fresh air at the school too you know. Then I wouldn't have had to walk all the way over that field," he joked.

          Lillian fingered the hem off her dress and relinquished, "I felt stupid, sitting there alone. It won't matter anyway; I doubt anyone noticed I left."

          Tommy shrugged, replying, "I did." Then realizing how stark that sounded, he leaned his head towards her and added, "And the geeks are missing their queen."

          Lillian smiled faintly and said, "Gotta love the geeks." The breeze rushed by, splaying her long hair against her back, and she looked over at Tommy. "So how did you know where I was?" she asked.

          Tommy glanced ahead and stated rather then questioned, "You don't remember."

          "Remember what?" the willowy girl wondered aloud.

          Tommy was staring out, over the outcropping of slides and other structures. "Second grade. We all use to play here after school; you use to hide in the tire tunnel every time," he said.

          Lillian smiled slightly and nodded. "I remember. You got a splinter on the monkey bars and cried," she recalled.

          Tommy shot her a stare and objected, "I **didn't** cry."

          Lillian swung foreword a little and replied, "You did."

          There was a pause before the boy admitted, "Ok maybe a little. But it hurt." Lillian laughed at this and Tommy was grinning too. This whole place was littered in so many memories, perfect distant memories. They looked over it, the bare haunting blue that had settled over it instead of the dazzling white summer mornings they remembered. Finally Tommy started to say to shatter the stillness, "Are you cold? You can wear my jacket."

          Lillian shook her head, responding, "No, that's ok, Tommy. Really, I'm fine. It's not that bad out, it's not winter yet."

          The boy shrugged and went on, "Yea I guess. Still, if you get cold, just let me know ok."

          She was looking ahead when she said, "You shouldn't have come here."

          Tommy cocked an eyebrow and asked, "Why not?"

          She was smiling slightly when she half joked, "Because you're too great and I might just have to kiss you."

          The boy mock shrugged and retorted, "Well, I'm not against that."

          Lillian laughed and looked over towards him. "Won't your date be looking for you?" she questioned.

          Tommy shook his head and replied, "Natalie? No, she's cool. I said I'd be right back anyway."

          Glancing down at her bare legs, Lillian forced out, "Oh. Well that's great, she seems nice."

          Tommy nodded, adding, "She is."

          "Yea," Lillian said quietly and she began to stop whatever slight movement she'd created on the swing, her feet skidding softly against the grass. Many of the electric stars were hidden from view by dark clouds that ruptured in shifting shapes across the white face of the moon. She was staring upwards when she mused, "You ever feel like you're so lost and a hundred miles from anything you thought you wanted? And you're too far to go back?"

          Tommy shook his head and couldn't help but laugh faintly. "Not really, Lillian..." he commented.

          She glanced over at him and was smiling when she quipped, "I'm trying to be deep here alright. You can't laugh when I'm trying to be deep; it's not allowed in the rulebook."

          Still grinning, Tommy nodded and replied solemnly, "Alright, I'll stop."

          Lillian sighed and tried to elaborate, "I don't know, I confuse myself too. But me and Phil, we use to have these talks. I know we always acted like we couldn't stand each other and I really can't sometimes. But after my parent's went to bed, when we were supposed to be asleep, I'd go visit him in his room if I was really worried about something or just needed to talk and he'd do the same to me. Now, we barely speak to each other."                    

          Tommy held a hand out to grasp the chain of her swing absently. "So, talk to him. Phil really isn't that bad of a guy, he's all noise. He'll get over it," he advised.

          Lillian countered miserably, "Yea but, I don't think he should get over it. What I did was shitty, I'd be mad too."

          Tommy nodded and said bluntly, "Yea, it was shitty."

          Gazing over at the boy, she exclaimed with a laugh, "Well feel free to be honest, Tommy!" He just smiled in her direction before Lillian glanced back out towards the expansion of night. The silence slid around them and then Lillian thought aloud, "People say you're supposed to "grow up" and "find yourself" in high school. They say it's normal to sometimes drift apart with the friends you had in middle school. But it was different with you guys; you were a lot more then just really good friends. You were there for everything, you guys know me better then myself. I feel like I lost myself when I lost you guys."

          When he was wondering why he felt so much for her, she'd go and say something like that, more honest and real then he knew any girl to be. Because she wasn't perfect in the least, she was self-absorbed, and constantly trying to play the victim, and always so indecisive. But there was also that addictive laugh and that way she always kept him guessing and her real genuine caring. "You know you didn't loose us right? We're still right there, waiting..." he began to say and unintentionally dragged her swing closer to his by the chain. "And that was really pretty great by the way, and I might just have to kiss you," he teased.

          She laughed and turned to look at him, her moss eyes matching his, and there was that hesitation of silence again. They were so close and then their faces were nearing, the smiles slipping away. Tommy pressed his lips to hers and she could feel his breath gloss over her. His free hand went to the back of her head and Lillian melted into him, her breath catching in her throat, all real thoughts disappearing for the moment. A chill swept by and fell against their skin. 

          Then he pulled back, staring at her, and all his logic returned. He had a really great girl waiting for him to return to the dance, and Lillian had a boyfriend. Who was in the hospital. Whatever had made him believe this was a good idea had dissipated and his brain took over. "I don't know why I just did that..." he said in self-blame and stood from the swing. Tommy turned and started to walk off. 

          Lillian watched after him, a little stunned, and called faintly, "I'm sorry, Tommy..."

          Tommy stopped to turn around again, shaking his head and running a hand anxiously through his mass of dark hair. "No, Lillian. I'm sorry. I'm the one who should be sorry, because you have a boyfriend, and I just kissed you, and that was wrong. I don't know what I was thinking," he repeated.

          Pallid dunes of light filled the space between them and Lillian replied, "I meant for everything. I'm sorry for everything I did to you guys, for how I treated you."

          The boy nodded and said, "We know you are, you've already said you were, Lillian. I've forgiven you, and if the others haven't, they will." Then he started to turn to leave and remarked knowingly, "Maybe you need to forgive yourself."

  
-- 

**Author's Note: **Ok you have to admit that song is cheesy! And if you like it well, sorry but you are... corny. Kidding of course. I also mentioned **Old School** and Will Ferrell. Because both respectably kick major butt. 

Let me say first, yea! A TL kiss! I hope you had as much fun reading that as I did writing it because woo, my favorite couple getting it on. Of course it couldn't last because there is still Brett and Lil really does care for him. ::_cough__ cough gag gag_:: Well what would you readers have me do, have Lil break up with him while he was in the HOSPITAL? God, you guys are evil. Yea, and there is **perfect** Natalie. Ok second of all, the reason this was not updated in such a frickin long time is because I was really busy, then my comp died, then this laptop would not take floppy disks, then... I died? Do you forgive me? Please? This chapter was all about forgiveness! Yes, yes it was. Kimmi forgiving Phil enough to trust him not to hurt her again, Tommy "forgiving" Phil in the first part (He really wasn't all that mad in the first place...), Phil realizing its time to forgive Lillian a little or at least try, Lillian realizing how horrible she was and forgiving herself. (Whether she even deserves the right for anyone to forgive her is up to you.) Ok so it seems Lillian is starting to slowly but surely return to the old gang, of course it will be gradual as they just won't instantly forgive her and everything will be all hunky dory! Don't worry, I won't be dragging this out either and forcing you to endure boring cheesy "best friend" montages or anything. But Phil seems to be finally getting over it and I think Tommy has, because he kissed her. Also there was the KISS! And did I mention, the KISS? Hee. Well how could Lillian not like Tommy because I mean, he's Tommy! I brought back the "rule book" and the "nail polish" and the "Tommy Fan Club" and "Philly", I'm a fan of running jokes. Plus I like foreshadowing, so don't forget about what Lil said about her talks with Phil! Anyway, I added that long CA scene in at the beginning unexpectedly, I realized I should be building on their relationship more so there you go, taa daa. Plus they are cute. Did anyone feel bad for Angelica this chapter? Anyone? Please? See, she is a normal girl under that hard outward appearance she gives off, who feels alone and hurt just like everyone else, more so since she is always pushing people away. Still not feeling bad for her? PK was in here, not so much, but they will be getting their first date next chapter! Yay! I really do not want to mess with them, they are so "drama free" compared to TL and Drama Mama, Lillian. So you may just get straight up cuteness, we will see... But there is that whole little detail of Phil really worried and second guessing himself around Kimmi so he avoids hurting her which is not good in a relationship.  

Added that in about Susie being in private school because well, I had to explain where she was but I really am not planning on writing her into this fic. Dil either, except in a few parts maybe. I find them boring and I really have no idea how they would act because I haven't watched the show that much. So, sorry if you are a fan of either. =o/ If you want, feel free to sit down and write in where you think they could fit into this story for your own enjoyment. Haa. 

And anyone who is afraid of Hillary would not want to meet a few of my friends. Yea, they are that bad. I know a couple who are like T/L too, always so much DRAMA. She cheats on him and he cheats on her and there's yelling, and yet they always get back together. She's just messed up and he really loves her, I believe. She lost her twin brother at the age of seven when he was run over by a car so yea, she has abandonment issues. (Hmmm, could that be a story idea? No, I couldn't kill Phil! That would be horrible for my poor PK!) Plus she never knew her father. But yea, there are a lot of drama-full relationships, not that I get it really. ::Sigh:: Anyway promise not to take so long next time ok? Because its chapter eleven, boy how the time flies! See you later.  


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